Saturday, December 30, 2006

MY TOP TEN OF 2006 INCLUDES BOTH ME AND YOU DEAD... PLEASE FILL IN THE OTHER EIGHT SLOTS YOURSELF... Above -- Yet another shot from the 200LBU Holidaze party. Ricky belts out a heart wilting rendition of 'Too Deep Until Now' by Chain of Strength via karoke.

For those who care about that sort of thing, my fave crap of '06 can be found over at the FMU and Ecstatic Peace sites. I'll put links to it at the bottom of the post. Dig on it you sexy things, you. Since this was such a bonny year for music, there was a few things I totally forgot about when I scrawled down these pointless lists in an indecipherable scrawl (Praise be to Saint Laughner) Colossal Yes was played so many friggin' times around the Classon castle that it was sorta forgotten when it came time to make these lists. It's crawled into the walls like a cute dead squirrel whose stink smells like a scented candle from the classiest painted wagon in the nicest mall in New Jersey. I gotta copy of 'Tumbleweed Connection' hidden in my ascot and I'm not afriad to show it. Neither does Mr. Yes. I wanna hear more of these jams, but I want them to sound like Glyn Johns produced the fucker, not some hack from the early nineties. Shit...did I say that out loud? Gotta stop doing that...should make that a resolution for the new year ahead or whatever...

And another I forgot to list was Boxcutter's 'Oneiric' jam on Planet Mu. Mr. Barry Lynn made (to me) the only sit-throughable electronic groove full length of the year. As much as I love all these cwazy 12" singles I've accumulated throughout the year (Big up to Chamberweed and Dr. Don Cream for hipping me to alot of them) I gotta say when these Dubstep/Whatever cats shoot out a full length of the shit, I'm bored within the first fifteen minutes or so. It's not their fault though. Much like early Hardcore, the stuff's only good in short spurts when you're rockin' it at home. When you're out and about and within a crowd, it's a total different story. Or that could just be me. But I've spun this 'Oneiric' thing more than a few times and it still sends ice cold razor blades up my spine. Dig your nails into the ass of 'Sunshine VIP' and FEEL IT. Yup...she's a keeper...

Brooklyn B-Boys Blues Control don't need no nod and wink from yours twooly, but what the fuck? Let's do it anyways...All their cassettes jams (esp. the one on Fuck It) were sheer grace. Like watching Mike Post jam out in a Parisian cave. Can't wait to see what happens on the real deal full lengths coming out on Holy Mountain and Woodsist. Dig in and let's see what the Red and the Black has for us in the ought seven...

Like I stated in the post prior to this one, this is the first year in my life where I've ever felt conciously bitter and bored with music, even though there's been so much that's sent my heart a twitter. From Home Blitz to Violent Students to the re-issue of Jackie Mittoo's 'Wishbone' to all that output on Hot Flush and DMZ. Fucked Up sent my mind into too many inner debates regarding the idea of song as a celebration of oppression or spirtual arrival. But then the idea of abuncha maries slapping each other with their purses to 'Negative Approach' creeps into my head and I wanna move to a cave with nothing but a copy of 'Younger Than Yesterday'. I guess all I gotta do is never leave the house in '07 and have all my records and information delivered to me by small Peruvian boys and I'll be AOK. Anyone know any small Peruvian boys???

Oh yeah, go over and look at this kids' deal...I like his steeze...

And take a look at this friggin' rapist...


Tuesday, December 19, 2006

SHIT FROM A NEW YEARS NOTEBOOK -- AKA -- A FOOT WITH A MATCHING BULLET Above -- Group shot from the 200LBU Holidaze partee -- BACK ROW --(From left to right --Annonymous member of Satanic Witchery, Annonymous staff member of Dusted, Meadowlark Lemon, Devandra Banhart and annoymous 'guest' of Mr. Banhart FRONT ROW -- (From left to right -- Jimmy Pursey, 200LBU editor-in-chief Coach Smothers and 200LBU co-editor Tonya Loiterminn.

For some godforsaken reason, I’ve taken to ingesting the extract of watermelon seeds every few nights this week. While under the influence of that sweet, sweet shit, I‘ve taken notes in a ‘year end‘ fashion. It’s all a buncha hooey. A blur of Crisco and Rolex and all that kinda stuff. Take from it what you can…

Call off your dogs, I got nothing to tell you. Nothing more than what I’ve ever told you in a million other ways, being the whore that I am. New noisy punk dudes, kids in warm-up suits around South London, moldy favorites found under the bed…it’s all still news to me. Seems strange the first year I’ve actually felt bitter and bored with music is the same year I’m so blown away by most of what I hear. Let’s just say crowds give me gas and if you ever want to just come over and jam records, I’m down. It’s gotta be better than watching a thousand shlongs wag in motion, licking each other to the beat of acceptance.

I think Dolman said it a month or so back, but 2006 was certainly the return of the weird, cool idea of actually pressing up a few hundred singles of yourself and selling them. Sounds kewky , don’t it? There was the Home Blitz shit, The Jacks, Homostupids, Armas Huutamo, Velveeta Heartbreak, Sex Vid, the Religious Knives one, the list literally goes on and on. Some of them were great initially, until their veneer of intrigue was wiped away when you learned the artist posted on a message board twenty times a day and had a webcam. Mystery has been replaced with an unneeded knowledge of everything it seems. Not to sound like a blue hair with a cane underneath my armpit, but think about if The Misfits, Throbbing Gristle or Combat Stance Fanzine had the interweb in the day and time they existed. Would it have worked? Could they maintain that much of an image while telling you every time they took a crap? I’m sure brighter people than I have debated this issue, figured out the problem and then both ate and scored with Bernadette Peters and Shirley McClaine. Good for them. For now I beat on a rock and rock the seven inch jams of the year. Ain’t gonna make a list though…didn’t I already sorta do that up there? Leave that shit to the others. All I gotta say is these singles gave me a good amount of exercise running to and fro the turntable and that’ll add a year onto my life. Fucking great…

Jack off with pride in the year 2007 if you scored a copy of ‘For Sada Jane’. I’ve been watching the clock for awhile now and the arms keep moving real fast. I keep the thought of movement constantly in my mind. Stumbling is movement. Falling flat on your face is movement. Pushing the two actions together and holding them together with spit and chewing gum and keeping them intact is the job of the Markers. Anyone who has been watching for this whole time will tell you this is where the wormhole has been leading. ‘Shabbetai Tzevi/1666’ is a stoned gem that burns. Up and over, over and out…give me the time and I’ll tell you everything I heard from a twelve year old last week.

Sunday, December 17, 2006


Monday, December 11, 2006


Wednesday, December 06, 2006

I'M BACK SLEEPING OR FARTING OR SOMETHING (ALL YOU EMO KIDS WHO GOT THAT REFERENCE, TRADE ME THE NOT FOR THE LACK OF TRYING DEMO ASAP) Do you know how many times I've gotten this far? Went to the 'create post' screen, picked out some silly photo, threw it up there and just stopped. Didn't even get as far as staring into a blank screen. It seemed almost immediatly I would think "This is fucking is this going to get me money, drugs or pussy?" It was then I 'd retire to my bucket of Crown Fried Chicken and wallow in a pool of poultry grease and self loathing. But it was fun while it me sick, call me twisted (just don't call me late for dinner!) but there's something really beautiful and therapuetic in the act of renting bad movies and chronic scratching. Some told me I was crossing over into real 'Carl' territory for awhile there, but I think I'm back for now. It wasn't all totally pointless....The local Crown gave me a free bucket of chicken for that endoresement a few sentences back, so that's cool...

So what have I been listening to inbetween repeated watchings of 'Little Man' and walks to the store to get smokes? Let's go through this pile on the floor and take a look.... Although every fucking promotional blurb for this new 'Best Of/Retrospective' Josef K thing (entitled 'Entomology') would make the average blood pumper wanna wretch a pretty stream of blue ('For Fans of Franz Ferdinand') you can't deny the jams still sound real good. Shit man, do you remember when you could enjoy a good herky-jerky limey beat without some college grad mentioning some new school group of aqua net users? Those were good times...But one keen earfull of these Scots is all I need to watch the goggle glassed throngs blast away on a cloud of fart dust kicked up by whatever 'free folk' unit they're hyping this week. See you on the pages of Pitchfork assholes! You get all the gloomy hits from the Postcard releases (It's Kinda Funny', 'Forever Drone' ,and my personal fave, 'Heart of Song') and a throng of tunes from the always rumoured, never hoid 'rejecteted' 'Sorry For Laughing' lp. Tacked onto the end is their last Peel Session, which yields a confusing cover of Alice Coopers' 'Applebush' that makes me love these sad widdle boys that much more. I can't really remember any other re-issues that came out this year (I guess I'm still having some 'Carl' moments at this date) so for now, I'll say this is my 're-issue of the year' and be done with it and wait for Domino to send me a bucket of flan for this endoresement.

My boys in Philadelphia, Violent Students, have just done up a brand new spankin' CD-EP on their own Richie Records named 'Street Banger' and I encourage the purchase of it for the simple reason they hold compromising photos of me weeping in a pair of tighty whities while a copy of 'Tapestry' can be seen vividly spinning in the background. I love these boys so much, that I will personally make sure their long awaited opus 'Towelhead' will see release before the end of the year on a label that does packaging that looks strangely like this 'Street Banger' CD. Hmmm....

Also based outta Philly is that there Meg Baird who you might know from the Espers band. Her solo two song single goes by too damn quick for it's own good as far as this ole fat bottomed squirrel's opinion goes. The cover of my favorite Fraser and Debolt song is like some weird message from a satelite that runs on fried food and Yuengling that this thing had to have a home here in Classon Castle. Apparently, this single should be treated as some sorta 'teaser' to the upcoming full length to be released by Meg in the new year. Consider me teased. Hopefully filthy Tonya Vodges still has some floating around his Tequila Sunrise fortress. Contact the ole boy here and find out --

A few months ago, in a fog of double chins and wooded wangs, someone handed me a personalized package of sounds that I thought was real sweet. The look and feel of the object just shreiked care, and I was touched. That was until I threw the thing into the disc player. After listening to it, I felt 'touched' in a different way. Since I'm the type who showers in a wetsuit, I can't really point to the spot on the doll where I feel 'touched', but trust me, it's there. Did I hear someone go to the bathroom? Did someone just half assly quote 'All Cried Out' by Lisa Lisa? Why are a bunch of crazy bitches telling random bad jokes on top of one another? ..And it begins again. The CD-R is question is 'The Lexie Mountain Boys Play Sexy Fountain Music' by the Lexie Mountain Boys and it can be obtained at --

I can't help but look at the cover of this Never Healed 12" and think it looks like the soundtrack for 'The Blair Witch Project III -- The Search for Curley's Release demo', but I gotta say the thing kicks ass. Imagine if Rorschach drank and fucked more and listened to Motorhead instead of Slayer. This group of Northern Cali kids get the goat moving when all it wants to do is eat cans. Apparently a fuckload of these were damaged when someone told Frich Slappendorf (CEO of Parts Unknown, the label that released this album) there was a copy of the Pratt lp hidden somewhere in the shipping. So you know what that supplies of modern Hardcore at rock bottom prices on eBay! Ha-cha! Whoever scores me one of those Never Healed/Violent Minds split singles first will get constant mentions in my writings for years to come! No flan required! Just score me that record! For now, send your money to Parts Unknown and Crazy Jay will send you a copy in the next year or so --

Alright, that's more than enough. Hopefully I'll come back before the year is out and talk about the Skream lp and other shitte. For now, to join in with the big boys in webtastic functions, please take part in 200LBU's 'Best of '06' polls. Post your ballots in the comments section. Tanx!

BEST TELEVISION SPECIAL OF 2006 -- A) Scott Walker and Clay Aiken -- A Mother and Son Reunion Live From New York B) 'A Very John Allen Christmas' Christmas Special C) 'American Pioneers of the 20th Century -- Sid Sludge'

>BEST BAND OF 2006 -- A) The Sandpipers B) The Byrds C) Fucked Up

> BEST SHOW OF 2006 -- A) Two dudes at bar during Magik Markers set at Northsix B) Max Eisenberg appearence at Bernstein/Miller wedding C) Dancefloor inbetween XO4 and Blues Control last Friday night

BEST RECORD COVER OF 2006 -- A) Donna Roitminn - 'Harshing My Mellotron' B) Mouthus - 'I Trust My Cock, Etc. (i.e. -- Balls)' C) Lambsbread - 'Water Damage'

If you have any other 'honorable mentions' for 2006 PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE submit them (to me) P.S. -- Co - written by the beloved Grimace...

Monday, November 13, 2006

Ten years ago, Nick Forte and I were just like these two random youngster douches I just stole from the internet. Ski-capped, high as hell and, most importantly, bearded. We were running high on the fumes being kicked out by the Forced Exposure mail order lists and whatever Actuel we could find that week. Those was the daze... If you told me then I would be listening to more Warzone than MEV in my old age, I most likely would of crawled into a small hole and wept, but I was a total faggot back then, so whatever. Nonetheless, all the new sounds we were discovering inspired us to put together a fanzine named The 200 Pound Underground. The first issue came out 10 (fuck!) years ago this month. K-wazy! In the past ten years, I managed to kick Nick to the curb (I'm a total dick) and squeeze out 5 (fuck!) issues by myself. Some people have shown interest in seeing those early issues, so without further a doo-doo...

I have done up a limited (100) re-print of the first issue of 200LBU. It features interviews with Brian McMahon of The Electric Eels, Eddie Flowers of Crawlspace, Mooseheart Faith as well as fiction written by the dearly departed Jim Shepard and a tour diary from New Zealand's Brother Love. There's also a review section where everyone from The Grateful Dead to The Infections to NNCK to DJ Spooky (Please, don't axe...) get much love. If you're interested in getting a copy, e-mail me at -- t rettman at hotmail dot com and we'll work it out.

Next time, I'll talk about musik...right now, I want your money...

Saturday, October 21, 2006


When I was just a mere nipper of a napper, my family and I used to take yearly vacations down to the Jersey Shore. Most of the time they were pretty uneventful visits. My older sisters would get drunk and try to hook up with guidos from North Jersey while my parents and their friends would get drunk in our bungalows while playing cards. Which left lil old me with really nothing to do. In my sad little mind danced a bizarre (Bizarre for a twelve year old) obsession with the Beach Punkers of Southern California. Skate parks, dudes wearing leather jackets in ninety degree weather, turf wars, etc. All this stuff was implanted in there by numerous readings of my older brothers’ issues of Flipside, We Got Power, and other SoCal Punk rags. I thought that maybe, just maybe, there had to be something similar going on at the sandy terrains in our state. No such luck, shmuck. I would ride my skateboard up and down the boardwalk hoping to find one kindred soul or even someone who would beat me up for being a poser, but there was nothin’ doin’. Little did I know there was that whole Mutha scene going on somewhere near by, but even though it was close to the beach, I wouldn’t really consider any of those bands ‘Beach Punk’. Most of those guys just looked like they wanted to be in The Anti-Nowhere League and seemed pretty tame and lame at the time. If only I knew then what I know now. I’d be a proud property owner from all the copies of the Send Help single I woulda scopped up at that weird ass record store on Morley’s Pier! But I digress…

If only I had found The Jacks ‘Concrete Death’ single amongst all the musty second hand copies of ‘Nantucket Sleighride’ and Chronic Sick singles back then, I would have been psyched . In typical shitty fashion, I find it twenty something years after the fact when I can't stand on a skateboard for five seconds without crashing to the ground in an elderly heap. But I’m still psyched I found out about it. Awesome mid-tempo beach moves with hooks a plenty and a real dense though fitting recording job. And they're from the Jersey Shore man! And even though the idea of something like this in this day and age might sound abit cheesy to the bitter contingent reading this (Hello brothers!) it ain’t. Lyrics about cruising down North 35, feeling weird about trading your stick in for a job in the city, smelly book smart hippy punks, etc. Shit man, where’s Mark Chesley when you need him to put this shit out? I guess these guys are just gonna hafta reap the benefits of these swell sounds by releasing it on their own. If I coulda sandwiched these tunes in between some Symbol Six and Simpletones on the mix tape I blasted on my walkman those lonely days down the shore, it wouldn’t have been so bad. I guess for now I’ll just sandwich them in between some Agitation Free and Distance on some CDR and be happy with it. Check these cats out on their MySpace page and buy a couple copies of the single off them while you’re there.

And while you’re still using this glorified typewriter, splooge on over to the Wounded Galaxy blogspot and check out David’s rather awesome observations on music and fun. This Canuck has got the fever and it won’t go down.

…And check out Jay Hinman’s newest blog-o-sphere entitled Detailed Twang, an obvious reference to everyone’s fave Brit art punk nutises The Door and The Window. I knew you couldn’t keep the Hin-mann down…

So, I guess that’s about it for now…next time perhaps some musings on more gemstones of sound of an interview or just plain ole bellyaching…either way, you know you’ll love it…

Sunday, October 15, 2006

I'D TELL YA...BUT YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE IT... Once again...So sorry for the lack of correspondence in the past few weeks. I was tieing up some loose ends with actual writing that will actually pay, so you can understand why typing away at something that will be seen by no one but the converted might go to the back burner. No offense to you old chum, old pal, old one last ticket for the ten o'clock showing of 'The Marine', but sometimes (believe it or snot) I got bigger fish to fry. Yeah...It shocks me too. Nonetheless, expect more than usual in this space in the next few weeks. Aren't you exicted? Yeah, I can feel it, man...

The other reason I haven't been floggin' at the bloggin' is that I haven't really had much scratch to spend on records these days. Been diggin' through the crates lookin' for gems of yore that put a spark under my booty after I sparked the buddah back in the daze. One gem I re-discovered was that Harsh Reality jam 'Heaven & Hell'. I remember checking this out due to some parakeet like dude telling me it had some sorta Sensational Alex Harvey Band connection. After much research (Pre-internetting, fools) I found it in fact didn't have any connection to SAHB and felt somewhat roked, but once I started to jam the platter, I felt an immediate connection. A good feelin' to know. The tracks are sorta all over the place in a good way. One minute you're listening to a Brit blues jammer, the next some sorta melancholy Procul Harum shit and before you know it, one track will sound like it should be off of 'Mr. Fantasy'. Not to say this is all some second tier compilation record of British Rock of the 60' sir. Just giving you an easy understanding of what you're getting into. That's my job. My non-paying, self-assigned job. Yeesh. Just lettin' you know it's a good one to discover again or discover right now. As far as I know, even the CD re-issue of this is OOP, so hopefully you can find it used somewhere. If you wanna an OG vinyl copy of it, prepare to chop off a limb or a relatives'. I guess you can get it at one of those new fangled 'file sharing' sites the yobs all talk about. I'm too much of a stinkin' hippy to do such things.

I sure did see that 'American Hardcore' film. I sure did...I sure as hell did...What? My opinion? has YDI footage...that it sure did...hmm...I wish they interviewed more women than coatracks...It's easy to wipe your hands clean after 1986. Harley rules. MDC are talked about for 15 minutes and the beginning of their portion starts off like 'Star Wars'. What the hell is that? These guys had one good record...if that. Pfft. got my blood angered up. Did I tell you there was YDI footage?

I interviewed Princeton prodigy Daniel DiMaggio (AKA Home Blitz) for Uncle Eddie Flowers' truly happenin' Slippy Town Times website. Check it out here -- Yes, that is right...I'm real lazy.

Sometime in the next week, either here or on the FMU site, they'll be more writing. Most likely about Fucked Up making the record of the year (Did I stutter?) The re-emergence of shore core with The Jacks, The two most recent cassettes by Car Commercials, and how I have convinced more than one person that one of my heroes is a rapist. Keep on sploogin'...

P.S. -- I forgot to mention I have finally gone totally helmo and started a MySpace page...Will you be a froid on MySpace? Will you let me meet you on MySpace? Will you let me show you some lame ass picture I took of myself in the mirror on MySpace? Will you find me in the toilet on MySpace? Will you suckle at the teet of Fritz on MySapce? Will you read me your life storyon MySpace? If so, get with me'friend'....(I wanna die)

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

The sound of urine hitting the bottom of a trash can is a normal occurrence in my nape of the neck, but sometimes it’s special. The other night I was out on the roof when I heard that usual gentle gushin’. I looked down to see if maybe I was missing some sorta watersportical hooker moves, when lo and behold, it was none other than Zachary Davis from that infamous Ohio improv crap rock band Lambsbread. Zac was scoring this new heroin/Gatorade hybrid drug on my corner and just decided to take a wee. How quaint! He tolds me they was in the area to both score drugs and play down at that wine cellar known as Tonic. He said I could get a ride with them if I promised to play ‘The Cinderblock Game’ on the ride there. Just then a chunk of wax the size of Bea Arthur’s clit fell out of my ear and I knew I was in for serious bidnit. The ride to Tonic found me chucking the cinderblock at this one cat with a blue bandana hanging out of his right pocket. Fucked him up bad. I came this close to spilling my mudslide down the front of my M. Ward t-shirt when we finally hit the Tonic. Outside were all these kids who were turned away from the Harley’s War show at CBGB’s. They all had on leg warmers and were jaggin’ to the beat of ‘We Gotta Know’. Fuckin’ total Nicole Ritchie shit. I was in their heads bouncing off their brains and they didn’t even know it. Blah.

As my hands started to swell back to their normal size, I had this weird flashback to a time I never had as a child. Riding bikes down a barren suburban road with a blonde haired girl. There was a chill in the air and some sorta (Jesus Christ) hint of hope riding through the electricity in the spokes. There’s just one thing…I never learned to ride a bike. Damn you Daniel DiMaggio! As you know since you’re such a hip motherfucker, Daniel is this kid outta Princeton, New Jersey who records under the moniker of Home Blitz. He put out this three song 7” earlier this year that sent many old men into heart attack mode. I was no exception in the situation, except for the fact I am not THAT old yet…dammit. He just pooped out another one entitled ‘Live Outside’ and where the first one brought jumbled visions of too many pixie sticks and not enough ass ointment into my preverbal ‘mind’, this one gets me all wistful and makes me wish I hadda window to stare out of that wasn’t caked with dust and splatterings of Taco Bell Fire Sauce. Gives me some sorta flashback to innocence I suppose…remember that shit? Yeesh…Maybe you won’t get so fruity when you listen to this and treat it as an actual frickin’ object. Get at Daniel and he’ll hook you up

So back at the club, Lambsbread hear the news that Britney Lohan had her second kid and they burn a dumpster fulla weed in celebration. No wait…I meant to say they burned a dumpster fulla homeless people in celebration. Either way, it’s awesome. Afterwords, they decide to play and burn on fumes of utter nothingness with contempt that’s got some expectation in it’s corners. I remember this time when I was a dumb ass kid and I took too many of these pills that Rosenburg nicked outta his Dads’ medicide cabinet. His Pops had some sorta back problem and these things were supposed to help it abit. All it did was make me wanna run up and down the street yelling ’Senior Week!’ I then felt like I was gonna shit my pants, but I was still happy to be alive. This is how Lambsbread make me feel. I know they would be so proud. Ten minutes is all you need of their blowout and you feel fucked. I wish that was how long my whole ‘trying not to shit my pants/running down the streets of Newtown’ episode went on for. Sadly, it went on for awhile and we missed going to see Unwound because of it. I guess I did us all a favor…Hi-Oh!
Lambsbread got shit’s coming out on Parts Unknown, Ecstatic Peace! and ninety million other labels ‘cause niggas wanna piece of the flavor. You want a piece too, dontcha? Too bad…go back to your studio apartment you faggot ass! Things will never be the same ‘cause you never treated people right! At least that’s what someone told me… if you wanna get with the ‘Bread.
I really got nothing else to tell you. Why don’t you tell me something? That would be interesting…

Friday, August 25, 2006


Day in and day out, my mailbox brims with utter crap that I have no use for. Letters telling me what I owe (Good luck getting it, dipshit) and what I need. Those manila enveloped, official looking jobbies that are merely ploys to join some white slavery ring organized by non-profit groups posing as white slavery rings….you know the drill. And then there are those mountains of garbage promo CD’s that can make a good man go bad. How Brian Turner and people of his ilk don’t go up to the nearest bell tower and start picking people off with a high powered rifle while uttering ’So many Jade Tree promos…So many Jade Tree promos’ is beyond me.

But, every once in awhile, a surprise comes in the mailbox that makes it worth putting on pants and leaving the house at dusk. One such surprise is a three song 7” recently released by a group outta Cleveland named The Homostupids. As soon as I opened the anonymous packaging and saw the name of the band and the cover of the single (A real dumbo drawing of a skull with a thunderbolt slashing through it) I was smitten as shit. It was almost like I didn’t have to listen to it! Thank God I did. In this past year, witnessing the utter brutality of units like Philly’s Violent Students and Pissed Jeans, Ohio’s Lambsbread, etc. has given me a giddy spark that the fucked up kids who love The Cro-Mags AND The Brainbombs AND The Dead C. AND Keith Hudson will finally have their say. Throw The Homostupids in that mix of kids. Recorded in the red and out the door, this single has a dunderheaded mean spiritedness that sucks in all the above mentioned sound burglars and shits it out totally splatter effect stylee. You could do no worse than to go to their MySpace page and pick up one or two or the entire pressing. Go to -- and shit’ll be sorted.

The following is an interview I conducted here at the 200LBU offices with one Steven Peffer, who claimed to the bass player in The Homostupids. As of ’press’ time, we have no proof. But if you could see the dent he left in our supply of Wild Turkey and all the blood he left on our collection of Bad Brains bootlegs, there’d be no doubt in your mind that this guy was both homosexual AND stupid…read on….

200LBU --Have you seen my pipe?
Steven Peffer :What do you mean? What kind of question is that?
200LBU --Never mind…How and when did you start jamming? Were there any other bands y'all were in prior to the Homostupids? How did you homos get to know one another?
Steven Peffer: Maybe a year and a half ago, I had an idea for a band I wanted. Simple repetitive bass lines under thin wanking guitar with simple song structure. I did a 4 track thing and enlisted some help from a friend or two. It came out good, but not what I was shooting for with an actual band idea. That recording will be titled “The Brutal Birthday" e.p. and it will be released as a 7” on Richie Records out of Philadelphia. Anyway, I found 2 dudes I didn't know before hand through just asking around over and over. That's Dale and Josh. They're great and the sound I had in my head kinda morphed into the 3 of us playing whatever it is we're playing, which I guess is very close to what I hoped for. I was listening to the Dwarves "Blood Guts and Pussy" album, The Grabbies and Supercharger. That was kinda the inspiration. I guess that's not a clear answer to your question right?
200LBU --Not even close, but who cares? Where exactly do you live in Ohio? Do you play out a lot?
S.P: We live in Cleveland and I like it here. It’s cheap. Food is cheap and rent is cheap and girls here have nice round full breasts. They don't come to see us though. I don't know what the reaction is. it's hard to gauge something like that I think. People tend to be drunk and dishonest, so I don't know and don't care too much. We just keep to ourselves and play once every other month or so. No other bands here play similar sounding music to us it seems, which me thinks good.
200LBU--If you could back in time to see any band perform live, who would it be and why?
J.P: Maybe when Metallica first got Newsted in the band and they would play secret club gigs as Vertigo. That would be cool! Share a small stage with Kirk and the boys!
200LBU--Yeah, I’m sure Kirk would love sharing a small stage with some boys. Are there any bands around now that you feel some sorta kinship with?
S.P : I don't want to say "kinship" but I like very much The Clockcleaner and Out With A Bang from Italy, also Shoot It Up from California is very good music makers. I like Cococoma from Chicago very much. Who else is good for me? Let's see... Throbbin Urges have an LP on Dead Beat that is over the top and right to the point and loudy too. I like that.
200LBU--How did you become pals with them there Violent Students?
S.P: Well, John jr. is the drummer I think, right? He moved to Cleveland for like 2 years and we were roommates. So I've known him well and good for like 5 years or so. I think he's the one who got me mixing tuna in with macaroni and cheese, which I still do. So he's my ‘in’ with that band. Richie, the basser in VS is a buddy of John Jr. so I know him through him and so on. They are nice dudes and have helped our band quite a bit whether they know it or not. I don't know what Richie's diet is like, but John Jr. doesn't seem to eat as much meat these days. I like the stuff and usually in the summertime I don't eat much meat. The heat limits my appetite, but this year red meat has been on the menu every week just about. Meatball sandwiches, kielbasa, bratwurst, salami, Lebanese bologna. all that shit.
?#6--Um…O.K. So, what are the future plans of Homostupids? Shows? Records?
S.P: Not much I think. We're recording an LP this weekend so we'll see how that goes. We play in town like I said, about once every other month. We have some out of town stuff lined up but we're limited to what we can do. Josh has a wife and a daughter and we don't have much money or reliable transportation. Also, we don’t have much motivation to go out of town and suck each other off or whatever.
200LBU--Again…‘Um, OK…‘ So, who is going to put out this LP? How many tunes will it be?
S.P.: It's kinda up in the air as to who's gonna release it right now. I'd like it to be on both vinyl and disc at the same time, so whoever can do that and pay for the recording wins!! I think it'll be like 10 songs… maybe 12. It depends how many come out the way we like. We'll record 15 songs total though, all live. My friend Paul just built a lovely very accommodating studio and has a large tile bathroom that we will set up in. we'll see how it goes. Blown out I hope.
200LBU--How did you come up with that rad ass name?
S.P: My first year outta high school, I started listening to alot of high energy garage stuff. My friend Stephe and I would eat some acid and for the first wave of it, the speed would slowly ride up. So, during this part we'd jam out Supercharger and The Mummies and shit like that. Jump up and down and sweat, then the mellow paranoid part would come in and outside we'd go. Then, the speed would come back when the mellow washed away and then hell crept in. So, while on the initial speed rush we brainstormed our high energy slop-o stupid as shit inept garage band and it'd be called the Homostupids. There you go. This was 9 years ago. We had one practice and that was it. I folded up the name and kept it in my pocket until I needed it again.
200LBU--Let’s do some word association….Jackson Browne…
S.P.: Overrated
200LBU--Wait a second..You think the Necros are overrated?
S.P: They are pretty good I guess. I just don't think they are as special as people make them out to be. Don't get me wrong though, they are better than most Ohio Hardcore bands from that time I guess? Better that Articles of Faith... YUK! Lyrically and musically they seem kinda Hardcore by the numbers, that is Necros not AOF. AOF is just plain g-a-y.
200LBU--AOF were from Chicago, but I guess we’ll just skip that…back to the word association…Bella Donna…
S.P: Injun
S.P: Penis
200LBU --Fucked Up…
S.P: Canada
200LBU -- DubStep
S.P: Kit Kat
200LBU -- Neil Young
S.P:Danny Whitten
200LBU: And finally…Max Milgram?
S.P : Penis penis.
200LBU: Very good…end transmission.

Friday, August 04, 2006


A few months back, Jay Hinman called me his bro-in-arms or something regarding our love for the girlie sounds. He wrote something about him and me being the only ‘dorks’ that care. DORKS? Sir, we are not dorks! I’ll tell you who a dork is! A dork is someone who weeps when their CDR limited to 5 gets hosed down by a D.J. just trying to show a crowd abit of fun. A dork is someone who discovered the Circle Jerks last year and then wants to debate on the proper way to mosh during Hair Police. A dork is anyone who writes an eight hundred word review on anything musical. But most of all, a dork is anyone who doesn’t have virtual air conditioning rushing through the cracks in their toes when they hear something as vital and alive as Twinkle’s ‘What Am I Doing Here With You?’ or anything off of ‘Dusty in London’.

Like most things, I don’t consider myself some sorta ’real life’ expert on these sounds. The reason for this could be because of my humble, self-deprecating demeanor. Or it could be because I fear a nation of cardigan sporting dudes who live in their moms’ basements telling me my girl group tastes are ‘pedestrian at best’. Nonetheless, I know what I like’s and that’s all there is to it. On these past days of absolute swelter in the shelter, I cranked up the A.C. as high as it could go, put on my beehive wig and white lipstick and jammed the jams that make women swoon, men shudder and take cattle off their feed. Here’s a sampling --

Dusty Springfield - ‘I Start Counting’
Sort of a cheese bag fusion-like intro kicks this lush one off and then that voice that could sooth the harshest of sun blisters kicks in and makes me wish I had some sorta consistent hook-up on pills that make everything look like a scene outta ‘Casino Royale’. I could never go into the technicality of the actual sounds created here…I’m too much a dolt on that front. All I know is this lady’s voice has made my life seem not so shitty from the deserts of New Mexico to the grey tinged streets of Bed-Stuy. I’ve lifted many a gin and tonic in my living room on a lonely night to her. Maybe you should do the same…just make sure no one’s around.

Val McKenna - ‘House for Sale’
Like I stated above, I don’t claim to be some know-it-all on this shit. Most of my ‘knowledge’ of it comes off the beyond excellent ‘Dream Babes’ compilations that the ever lovin’ RPM label has been shooting out over the past few years. All I know is Val busted out some singles in the mid-60’s with James Page on them that are quite stellar. This one isn’t as dreamy as some of the other jams that’ll be listed. Even though it’s got kind of a sad vibe to it, this tune’s gotta hip movin’ feel about it that might get you either sympathy sex or two minutes on the dance floor with an actual girl. The decision is up to you.

The Caravelles - ’Hey Mama You’ve Been On My Mind’
Another one off a ’Dream Babes’ comp (Volume Five) that’s like a gush of strong sea air rushing through my constantly retreating hairline. Total limey Spector worship done by two London office girls that went by the names Lois Lane (!) and Andrea Simpson. This track mixed with a little weed, and a little a.c. will make you feel like you’re in heaven…or at least in someone else’s living room.

The Supremes - ‘I Wish I Was Your Mirror’
I don’t care what anyone sez…the Ross-free era of The Supremes is staggering. The whole record this one comes off of (‘New Ways But Love Stays’) is a blurring trip of good vibes. It could be World War Three outside while this song is on and I’d still be all smiles. Have you ever seen me smile? It’s quite an occurrence when it happens….trust me.

Twinkle - ‘Take Me To The Dance’
Hinman wasn’t too impressed with ole Twinkie, but I think she’s the Brit girl shit. Most of her self penned tunes are heart string pullers about boy pals dying in motorcycle crashes and the like, but ‘Take Me To The Dance’ is a groover about nothing but the simple joys of being out and about with a person whose company you can tolerate for more than five minutes. I wish I could find that sorta bliss…

Abit ‘cut-off’ I agree, but I got more writing to do, hairs to be cut, rooms to be cleaned, and Odyssey records to listen to. If you’re in the Brooklyn area tomorrow (8/5) come on down to the Hook in Red Hook. Monotract is having a party for the release of their CD on Ecstatic Peace, ‘Xprmntl Lvrs’. So far, it’s one of my favorite things I’ve heard all year. It makes my hips move like rubber wheels and I can’t say that about much else out there. You’ll also get the chance to check out Magik Markers, Mouthus and the NY premiere of Canada’s Panopiticon Eyelids, another thing that’s sure to turn your socks to shit. DJ’s will be DJ Beard, DJ Gray and DJ Gaye. See you there…

Thursday, July 20, 2006

I could care less. You’re all fools. I can’t wait to see you fall..and Winter…and Spring! This weather sucks. I swear I saw the devil in the living room last night. The following tunes cools me...

Esther Williams - ‘Last Night Changed It All’
Homostupids - ‘Caveman’
Still Life - ‘October Witches’
Violent Minds - ‘Hit List’
Carl Carlton - ‘I Won’t Let That Chump Break Your Heart’
Awesome Color - ‘Ridin’
Burial - ‘Distant Lights’
Velveeta Heartbreak - ‘I Shot The Invisible Man’
Monotract - ‘Projectus’
El-B featuring Juiceman - ‘Buck & Bury’
Jimmy Pursey - ‘One Night in Paris’
Digital Mystikz - ‘Ancient Memories’ (remix by Skream)
10CC - ‘Headline Hustler’
Geeneus - ‘Congo’
Funeral Shock - ‘Dead Scene$ter’
Dusty Springfield - ‘Bad Case of the Blues’
T.U.M.E - ‘Love Shortage’
My Own Hands - ‘The Sound of You Slowly Dying’

Now go enjoy a nice bit of crack and read
  • THIS
  • . It’s all you really need. Whether you like it or not, you pathetic trend-hopping loser. See you down at the Tonic!
    P.S. -- Do I need to leave an emoticon to show the sarcasm in that comment?

    Sunday, July 09, 2006

    WOULD YOU TRUST THIS MAN WITH YOUR OSCAR? I DIDN'T THINK SO... Above -- Ben Chasny relaxs in the backyard of famous Pornstar Seymore Butts before shooting his cameo for 'Sex Organs Of Admittance -- Get Your Freak Folk On...'

    I look around at the piles of dirty socks and empty boxes of smokes on the floor. The other half of the double bed is a pile of old fanzines and mustard bottles. About twenty times a day I think I should get my act together and become an actual fucking adult. But just when the upstanding gentleman in me starts to take over, the phone rings and some sorta codger is yapping down the line to me about his dogs’ eating habits and tales of amps being traded for dope money and I sit there in rapt attention while ants crawl out of my laptop. I know I sound like a broken record, but I gotta say it’s a sad though interesting existence. People are nice enough to send records and they just sit there while piles of Dubstep 12”s’ are purchased and ‘Blue Letter’ gets played over and over again. But I took the time to listen to this Velveeta Heartbreak single that came in the post the other day. The A Side is a good enough lo-fi faux glam rave-up. This Michael Bowman character (A.K.A. The V.H.) is most likely some sorta Pop prince, so he might not understand I’m praising him when I say the riff that drives this track sounds like a leftover from ‘Rock ‘N’ Roll All Over’. But I’m praising you man…trust me. The B Side is a sorta sappy piano jam about the death of a Wilson brother that kinda mad me uncomfortable in the same way a weeping man on the corner does. Yikes. Nonetheless, ‘E’ for effort and all that. Get a copy at --

    Zac ‘Mild’ Davis unloaded a crapload of stuff on his Maim & Disfigure label on me awhile back and I never talked about it. I’m a dick and many people can attest to this. The majority of it was stuff by his bombastic Blast!-meets-Blue Humans power trio Lambsbread and all that shit kills, no doubt. But my fave amongst the lot was a solo jam from Zac that he calls Sky Juice. The CDR he passed off was entitled ‘Live At Brokeback Bridge’ and it’s a disorienting, low budget stew of Melvins riffage, loner/stoner folk and basic fuckedness. The boys’ not right and that’s why I think I might have had some drunken one night stand in Ohio when I was 10. It coulda happened! But one look at the handsome laddie will tell ya I had no hand in the doing of his making. Wait..wasn’t I supposed to be talking about a CDR or something? Oh yeah, so this Sky Juice jam, like all the Lambsbread jams, is available through Maim & Disfigure. Give Zac some time to recharge and have some juice and he’ll send out your shit post haste.

    Alotta man bitches like to talk shit, but then they realize ‘Gilmore Girls’ is off the air and they tie their shoes. Those types won’t be diggin’ the roar of this Violent Minds CD recently released on the Parts Unknown label. This sucker collects both the 7”s’ they released in 2004 and a cut off the ’Town of Hardcore’ 7” comp from the same time. All eight minutes of it bring to mind The Abused, Blitz, Negative Approach and Court Martial. Can you ask for more? Well, in the next month or so their full length entitled ’Eyes of Death’ will be out. Is that enough? How about this quote about V.M. from Don Rettman himself?. -- ’I guess Pig Champion didn’t die in vain!’ What else do you want? RIOT! RIOT! 1200 Pound Gorilla approved.

    Can anyone get enough Afternoon Penis? I for one cannot. I can take it anytime, anywhere. A new A.P. jam entitled ‘Up All Night’ is out on the Our Mouth imprint and it’s a ramshackle, raw percussion jam for all those who enjoy long toilet breaks and giving out cigarettes. Lotsa hip shakin’ homemade beats rise outta all the whining feedback and make me night dream about Nasty Nate doing a collabo with either Skream or Mick Fleetwood. I’m still not sure yet. Get your copy from the Fusetron empire or from Nate directly at

    There’s tons of other stuff that gives me a charge these days, but it sure ain’t music. Sleeping in my own filth, drinking Blue Moons, plotting revenge, staring at walls…these are the things that fuel me to occasionally lift a lip. Oh yeah, there’s also both of those Digital Mystikz 12”s’ that just came out on Soul Jazz. Buy that shit if you’re not too much of a mouth breather. If I only I could find a publication to fund my trip to South London to see this team in action so’s I could lose control of my ‘number two’ functions in the most dignified way possible. I’m sure with the right sound system, this shit makes Deathpile sound like Juan Denver in comparison. Why am I such a jerk? Because I’m fat, bitter and never been loved. I thought you knew that already.. Get both these twelves from Forced Exposure and tell ‘em no one sent you.

    Next time, they might be an interview with a mystery guest….there might be more reviews…there might be more pathetic bellyaching…Hey, who knows? I’m not in control here. See you on the corner of 7th and A….

    Friday, June 30, 2006


    200LBU endorses all the above. Run out and consume. Or read a book or smack a bitch or something constructive. Happy burfday AmeriKKKa! -- EL STINKO.

    Wednesday, June 14, 2006


    Last night, Max Milgram (vocalist for the always ready-to-ruck Violent Students) flew into my window in the form of Beki Bondage (above) and told me to tell ‘the kids’ about this show. You’re pretty much gonna get to see three of the best bands rollin’ right now for FREE! Is it worth the trip? You betcha! Will I be there? Well..if I didn’t have to take care of my World Cup Fever…maybe…but I got a serious case. But don’t let that stop you from going…it’s gonna be a corker!

    Magik Markers Lambsbread Violent Students June 18 2 PM free! Tequila Sunrise Records 525 W Girard Ave Philadelphia PA

    Also, for all you floppy haired Brooklynites, Pissed Jeans will be playing for FREE outside of OfficeOps this Saturday at 4 PM. As some of you know, these guys are the flakiest of the flakes, so a live show is a rare occasion. Go there and get your Sup Pop single auto-mo-graphed! Office Ops is at 57 Thames St. in Williamsburg.

    ‘You should really sit down and listen to ‘Tusk’ in it’s entirety one day, you pussy….

    Tuesday, June 13, 2006


    So sorry for the lapse in correspondence, but I actually have to pay bills and eat cheeseburgers and get through this awesome third season of ‘Black Books’ and take muscle relaxants and all such business. Sometimes, when I’m in the wonderfully foggy magic moment of a waking medicated dream, I imagine a lovely English country row full of green and mist. I walk stridently down the row unencumbered by normal, everyday shackles and seem to be….like….happy. It’s then I stumble upon a record shop (or ‘shoppe‘) that fits all the American stereotypes of quaint Englishness. Cobblestone tea coseys and all such bizz. It’s just then I usually awake to cries of ‘YOU A FAGGOT ASS NIGGA!!!’ coming through my bedroom window. It’s then I get up, eat a pot of buttered noodles and try to forget mostly everything, including the dream. Something tells me if the dream continued, I would walk into that record store to find either a too tight Uniform Choice shirt or a nice vinyl copy of Keith Cross and Peter Ross’ ‘Bored Civilians’ album. Either way, I’d be something of a winner. Some of you hardnosed Prog rockers might know Keith Cross as a member of T2, who put out that monster LP, ‘It’ll All Work Out In Boomtown’ on Decca in 1970. Some will know him as the guy who tried to screw your mother. Whatever. A couple of years after T2, Cross teamed up with Richard Thompson sidekick Peter Ross to do up the ‘Bored Civilians’ album. Those who like to take it free and easy in the countryside of their living room will take to this like ducks to duck sauce. English pastoral grooves that’ll please anyone whose ever dreamed of waking up at Headley Grange with a head fulla cheese and pills. Dig that cover of Fotheringay’s ‘Peace In The End’! And check out the line-up on here….Nick Lowe! Billy Rankin! Dee Murray! Jimmy Hastings! I know these names mean nothing to you noise helmos, but one day you’ll understand. And that gives me enough warm fuzzy to get through another painful fucking day…that and this CD re-issue of the above mentioned record. Si-Wan in Korea re-issued this awhile back…dunno if they still got it. If you wanna take the chance, go to their website - By the way, I could care less if you don’t understand one word of what I wrote. Get on the bus or get on your bike, fruit loop.

    And now I’ll talk more shit…The summer disastour to end all summer disastours will start this weekend. Those infamous cheesecake warriors The Magik Markers will take off to the west coast with the new breed of real deal miscreants, Ohio’s Lambsbread. Here be the dates…be sure to be there and to bring lots of pills. Those kids can eat the hell outta some pills…

    6-16 - Brooklyn, NY - Syrup Room 6-17 - New York, NY - Tonic 6-18 - Philadelphia, PA - TBA 6 -19 - Columbus, OH - Skylab Gallery 6-20 - Cleveland, OH - The Church 6-21 - Chicago, IL - Empty Bottle 6-22 - Iowa City, IA - Hall Mall 6-23 - Minneapolis, MN - TBA 6-24 - Minneapolis, MN - TBA 6-25 - Minneapolis, MN - TBA 6-26 - St. Louis, MO - Spooky Action Palace 6-27 - Kansas City, MO - Record Bar 6-28 - Oklahoma City, OK - TBA 6-29 - Denton, TX - Rubber Gloves 6-30 - Houston, TX - Proletariat 7-1 - San Antonio, TX - The Lounge
    7-2 - Austin, TX - Emo’s 7-5 - Los Angeles, CA - The Smell 7-6 - San Francisco, CA - Hemlock Tavern 7-7 - Eureka, CA - Synapsis 7-8 - Portland, OR - Towne Lounge 7-9 - Seattle, WA - Gallery 1412

    …And then those kids in Awesome Color are going on tour with those pros in Sonic Youth. Anyone else out there think that new SY disc looks like an homage to the Necros ‘Sex Drive’ single? Is it just me? Hello? Christ, I’m a loser…Anywhos, this Friday (6/16) will be the record release/tour farewell party for the A.C. (The CD on Ecstatic Peace comes out today) Brooklyn cavemen Mouthus will also be playing and some asshole will play some records before and after them. Some other nice person will play records for the rest of the night. Guess which one’s which and I’ll buy you a beer. I’ll be the asshole in the too tight Uniform Choice shirt. The show is at the Cakeshop, located at 152 Ludlow on the (formerly) Lower East Side.
    I hope that’s enough. You don’t know how difficult it is to do this shit…and I’m not just saying that to impress you…

    Sunday, June 11, 2006


    All these gems come courtesy of Al Barkleys' awesome osxhc site, which you can find at -- This site also might contain an interview I did with Dan O'Mahoney when I was 16. Look and see...

    Wednesday, May 31, 2006

    I AM NOT ABOVE SELF-PROMOTION...OR TOUCHING YOU FOR A REASONABLE FEE... Above -- Lloyd Barnes is like 'I think I need more speakers' and his boy is all like 'Yeah, you do!' So he goes out and gets more speakers and they blast Uriah Heep and The Viletones 'til the weed runs out. True story...

    Hey there hockey pucks--
    Dig my review of the Howlin’ Rain CD that appears in this weeks’ Village Voice. I figure some of you outside of the glorious New York area might wanna check it out, so here ya go.,rettman,73355,22.html
    Other than that, I got nothing for ya. Too busy with the fourth season of ‘Home Movies’ and transcribing hour upon hour of tape containing old men telling me how skeevy the Freezer Theatre was. Life is many a splintered thang. For now, how about a half-assed list of music I listen to a lot these days? That should hold ya…

    Super Eight Loop - cassettes (Bloodlust!)
    Career Suicide - 12” (Parts Unknown)
    Voivod - ‘Nothingface’ (MCA)
    Mind Eraser - ‘Cave’ (Painkiller)
    HG/BXC - ‘II’ (Heavy Blossom)
    Fleetwood Mac - ‘Rumours’ (Warner Bros)
    Dirty B.S. - 7” (Slasher)
    Various Artitsts -‘Firehouse Revolution - King Tubbys’ Production In The Digital Era 1985 - 89’ (Pressure Sounds)
    James T. Pursey - ‘Revenge Is Not The Password’ (Turbo)
    The Twinkle Brothers - ‘Dub Masscre Part 3’ (Twinkle)
    Loefah - ‘Goat Stare/Root’ 12” (DMZ)
    Vex’D - ‘Bombardment of Saturn’ 12” (Planet Mu)
    Violent Minds - CD (Parts Unknown)
    Various Artists - ‘Darker Than Blue -- Soul From Jamtown 1973-80’ (Blood and Fire)
    Pat Boone - ‘Departure’ lp (Polydor)
    Junior Delahaye - ‘Working Hard For The Rent Man’ 12” (Wackies)

    Please remember, there’s no such thing as ‘guilty pleasures’. It’s all in your head…just like your ‘god’. Got it? Good….until next tymee….

    Thursday, May 25, 2006

    What can I tell you people? Life is a strange, salty wind these days. One day I call out sick to work just to stare at the walls and the next one some MTV employee is telling me he tried out for Amon Duul 2. It’s crazy I tell you…crazy as hell. When I wanna wind down from all the shiny balls and general confusion, I throw on the slippers and watch the new Negative Approach DVD entitled ‘Fair Warning Volume One’. I guess the thought of a Negative Approach DVD is sorta preposterous to some people. Sometimes I think I might be one of them. But once I get an eye fulla Detroit’s baddest roaring blast furnace style off the stage at Traxx, I’m gobblin’ the shit up like a kiddy boy. Four sets are included. The first is an early one where JB is sporting a homemade magic marker made Black Flag shirt. Witnessing that is worth the price of admission alone, Jack! The set is honestly kind of boring but you get to witness Brannon pull off the lamest stage dive known to man during their cover of ‘Chaos’. Splendid! The next is a set from Traxx in ‘82 that is pure bootboy insanity. ‘This one’s for fun…it’s by Blitz’. That’s all ya gotta know. Now if someone can pull an Oi! Division DVD outta their ass, I’ll prepare them a cob salad! Third set from Paychecks’ starts out pretty crappy where all you can see is some fly cat sporting half a pair of eye glasses. Then you get to see Larissa start the pit and all is forgiven. Last gem is Pappy B. rockin’ out with The shit! When I was twelve, I would of given you my dads’ nuts for this footage. Nowadays, I got these guys sending this stuff directly to my friggin’ house. I love both technology , the postal system and old dudes who’ll talk to you for hours on end about both Bookies’ and Nunzios’. Spot the number of times you see Andy Necros in this DVD and win a gravestone signed by Doyle and a years’ supply of bath salts. And now…here comes that pain again….You can order this from the Negative Approach myspace page -- A special ‘F-You’ to all those people that do their shopping on St. Marks Street…

    And when I wanna wind down from THAT, I just throw on this new Axolotl 12” on Gypsy Sphinx entitled ‘Chemical Theatre‘. Both sides are custom made for late night stoning sessions where you can’t find your feet or your shoes. Terry Riley re-born as a Jersey pothead? Sounds fine by me! Makes me eagerly await some more of all this other shit Axo got comin’ out (A split with the Skaters on Catsup Plate, another full length jam on Psych-O-Path, etc) I think for now the only source for this disc is the Volcanic Tongue site over there in Scotland. There’s only 500 or so of these and I’d hate to think of you without it.

    Sorta feel like a douche sleeping on this Magik Markers 12” on Hospital for so long. I just figured someone would fling it outta van window at me someday, so why care? I should care a lot more I guess. Listening to this, I don’t feel I’m listening to the Markers, but an anonymous rip in the fabric beyond thickness. You say you gotta boy over there wrapped in the blackest of cloaks who once heard an MP3 of Negative FX? How quaint. I will cue this sucker up, play it down the phone at you and watch you curdled like the brain turd you are. ‘Inverted Belgium’ (the record I’m sorta talking about) is going fast since Pete Nolan is so damn hot, so you better act quick on this un too. While you’re virtually ‘there’, compliment Hospital proprietor Dominick on his lips. He likes that…

    Man, I gotta another Vex’D thing that I thought was pretty gnarled. This ‘Bombardment of Saturn’ 12” is a lesson in monotonous aggression that every tape wielder should be forced to listen to. It’s sort of a shame so many turn to smoke machines, phony Black Metal fans and bologna by the barrel when there’s something pretty vibrant and fucked with this Dubstep crap. There’s that Skream shit too that’s just as disorienting as spinning in place while reciting the lyrics to ‘Take ‘Em Up’. I can’t claim to be the most knowingest cat on this stuff, but as I consume, you will hear it about it. Lucky, lucky you… For now, just going to some of these spots might sort you out --

    OK…that’s all I got in me at this late hour. For anyone that would care, this Saturday morning at 9 AM EST, I will be doing the listener hour on WFMU. If you wanna hear abuncha stuff you don’t care about, tune in. I’d be glad ya did.
    Who knows when there will be a next time here. Who knows what I’ll talk about. Who knows why I’ve been carrying around this chicken carcass in my saddle bag for so long. I know I like that Black Market Baby discography that came out last month. I know I like Coach McGuirk. That’s all I know right now. So, with that in mind, let me go and gargle bleach…

    Tuesday, May 09, 2006

    IT'S AMAZING THE AMOUNT OF ASS SOMEONE CAN GET BY JUST READING WIKIPEDIA...OR.... HOW I LEARNED TO LOVE ASKINSTOO.................................... Above -- letters in the sand between GD + TV...ain't that sweet....

    Well…long time, no corny ass bloggin’. So sorry, but I have been embroiled in so many god damned things lately. Besides producing the upcoming Apple Hub Bub Gang 7” (entitled “Now That’s What I Call Bleech!”) I have been playing phone tag with Pappy Brannon as well as feverishly checking the Livewire message board for more talk of Chain of Strength and Free Jazz. Hot damn man! The kids are finally having their say! I have also been huffing much Freon and checking out tunes. “Rear Deliveries” boy himself hipped me to the sounds of the DJ duo outta London Town named Vex’D. Now, I know all this will be old hat to you hip young things with your Palmolive flavored drugs and big ole t-shirts, but this crapola really knocked me on my cute lil’ rear. It’s a knotted sound with jarring electro-shocks and jolts that sends sheer paranoia up the spine. And now I get to say the thing my parents used to say about The Meatmen….’HOW DO YOU KIDS DANCE TO THIS?’ Seriously, I could only see moving to this in a slow shuffle with your arms dangling like snakes. Or maybe I’m just not that good of a dancer…For those who don’t want to get into the murky depths of collecting all these 12” singles and crap, Planet-Mu did up most of their 12” jams on a two CD set named ’Degenerate’. It’s provided many a confusing night here at the cabin since it came through the doors. Perhaps it could do the same for you?

    Another thing that has been fucking me up lately is these CDR’s from Ohio’s Lambsbread. The sets they laid down while on the east coast a few months ago were holy gnarled godhead. If I ever have children (Rickles forbid!) I’d like ‘em to be like this lot of hooligans. Messed up on cough syrup…spinning ‘The Age Of Quarrel’ and ‘Demolish NYC’ back to back…writing ’fag’ on a mattress and setting it in front our neighbors’ window…cute scamp stuff, y’know? Most of their stuff comes out on band member Zach’s Maim & Disfigured label. My favorite out of the lot is ’Water Damage’, which not only destroys, but might win the 200LBU ’Best Cover Art’ award hands down this year. Shrieks and shards of feedback, hot leads and a drummer whose not sure whether to be the dude from Infest or a deboned monkey. You make the call by getting in touch with Zach at --
    Be on the lookout for a CD on Parts Unknown and a U.S. tour with The Magik Markers this summer. I can smell the burnt skin already…

    There are grizzled dudes who sit in poker sheds all day and all night for years playing every crappy record in the world. And then there are college grads who are slumming it until they inherit their daddy’s shoelace factory. Consider Burnt Hills in the former. As history has proven time and time again with everyone from Magic Muscle to The Screamin’ Mee-Mees, (not to mention those apple cheeked/ mentioned above Magik Markers) there is a strange and tempting allure to letting it all go in a basement, especially when you’re smoking toenail clippings out of a soda can. A thirty plus minute jam that is constantly shifting into the red eye zone, this is the type of stuff that makes bunk greens THAT MUCH better. Edition of 99 or something fucking retarded like that. Chrissy at Fusetron has it.

    At this time, I’d like to remove my pants and tell you that I’ve enjoyed many a good live show lately. The double whammy of The Believers and Awesome Color at the Cakeshop was a good drunken time for anyone who testifies in warm sludge and nice buns. The Believers opening with a scorching version of the Beach Boys’ Wild Honey’ and then moving into new material that’s the ultimate in sludgy love rock. Awesome Color provided the only kind of Psychedelic muscle you can get from smoking’ bowls, thrashing pools and jamming both the Shitlickers and Randy Holden. Y’all who are out of range of NYC could do yourselves a favor and check this unit out when they open for Sonic Youth in the southern area of our fair country. Go to Awesome Color’s myspace page and get the dates. If you expect me to give you a link, you can also expect to get herpes sometime soon. Then there was that hipster concentration camp show at the Syrup Room with Om/Endless Boogie,/Major Stars/Michael Hurley. This show was a fun time despite a sorta crappy p.a. and a constant foot in my groin. Major Stars brought the riffs and sex faces for all the yellow sweatered masses. Endless Boogie peaked and vallied through their set, but made up for it the next weekend at the Cakeshop with delivering one of the best set I’ve ever seen them do. Times New Viking were also on this bill and proved why they make so many blogboys hearts go atwitter. Twas a good night. I’m looking forward to more evenings of too much booze and not enough Blitz references. I hope you do the same.

    NEXT TIME (IF YOU’RE LUCKY…) Talk of the brand new Negative Approach DVD? Some old interviews out of the 200LBU dustbin? Maybe a new interview? Maybe I get a life? Well, as Lil’ Stevie Winwood said himself, ’Who knows what tomorrow may bring?’
    Now please drop dead…

    Friday, April 21, 2006

    Every once in awhile, some young buckaroo will try to play me some new fangled Hardcore band they think I’ll like. ‘Dude, they sound just like (fill in the blank), you’ll love it!’ The situation usually ends up with me playing the recurring role of the jaded old fart. ‘Jesus Christ! This shit is so retro they might as well be playing stand up basses and wearing pompadours!‘ I drunkenly foam into the poor kids’ face who was nice enough to play the record for me. After that, I normally go on about how forced the anger is and how their guitar sound is too thin before passing out on their couch in an inebriated clump. The sad thing is, I wanna like the stuff. I wanna believe ‘the kids’ will actually have ’their say’ one day. I’d hate to think all my finger pointing and jumping on other young boys’ heads was all in vain, y’know. And so enters Toronto Canada’s Fucked Up. I heard their name thrown around here and there among the hip Hardcore kids I’ve been known to give candy to time and time again, but never really investigated them until one of them played me one of their many seven inchers. I was immediately floored. ‘This is some legitimately pissed off shit!’ I thought. I was already too late in the game to collect all the singles they released, but luckily they’ve all (more or less) been collected on the CD format by the Deranged label with the title of ‘Epics In Minutes’. One earful is testament to the fact that Hardcore is the Blues for the alienated Suburban youth. It might be the same three chords and the same lyrics about cops and confused anger, but it’s what’s behind it that makes it what it is. The band usually keeps everything at a mid-tempo, which reminds me of the more Oi! Inspired tracks by Negative Approach. One thing is for sure, if their track ‘Police’ doesn’t make you wanna punch some random pretty person in the face and/or explode (whichever comes first) you should have your Hardcore hall pass taken away, post haste. The end of the disc contains their demo and some tracks recorded live. Both batches of jams sound so dense and distorted, you’ll think it’s some new noise joint on the Hospital label or something. Strangely, next up for the band is a seven inch on Vice (?!?) and then a full length on Jade Tree (?!?) But don’t let that deter you. This is thee angry for both the young and the old.

    Check out Fucked Up’s bloggo --

    Other than that, I’ve had a very weird obsession with the first side of Fleetwood Mac’s ‘Tango In The Night’ as of late. Anyone who can explain this event (‘cause god knows I can’t), please do so…

    Monday, April 17, 2006


    Like most loser boys who grew up in the late 80’s, I hadda major wood problem whenever that laugh parade known as ‘Married…With Children’ came on the T.V. set. Remember the episode when Kelly Bundy did that super hot dance routine with the janitor at the talent show? I’m sure you do. Well, I know I do at least (How sad) So many years and buckets of spuzz later, it seems sorta strange that my teen dream queens’ mother herself put out some sorta whacked out soft pop record in her time and prime. Who woulda thunk it? Who woulda cared? Well, I care! (How sad) Nancy Priddy not only mothered Veronica Corningstone, but she also released ‘You’ve Come This Way Before’ on the Dot label back in 1968 with the help of our old hero John Simon and the production credit of Phil Ramone (?!?). The recent CD re-ish on the always impeccable Rev-Ola label outta the U.K. is something that hasn’t left the CD player in quite some time and if you’ve ever clutched a glass unicorn, you’ll understand why. Sure, there’s plenty of brass flourishes and sunny day vibes all over the thing, but there’s certainly something screwy going on in the corners of this raisin fest. Check the doomy and creepy anti-war sentiment of ’Ebony Glass’ and tell me you can take a late night trip to the bathroom in the same state of mind ever again. The track ‘And Who Will You Be Then?’ also has the same sullen feel with plenty of weirdo moog blurts and bubbles adding to the disorientation. But yeah, there’s plenty of rainbow licking on here too. ’Mystic Lady’ is the number one track to throw on when you’re stoned out of your gourd and wanna get all lollipop on yourself. The thing I find funny is Pretty Purdie was the drummer on this session. I get a vision of him there, cig dangling from his lips, gettin’ slimy and down in the dirt for some of the funkier shit on here (like the title track, for instance) Then I picture him knee deep in disgust playing the happy white people beats on some of these tracks. Hey, it amuses me…I’m sorry. I’m not even gonna get into the track based on an Andrew Wyeth painting. It’s conceptual before Jon Anderson ever delivered a bottle of milk. And that’s a pretty heavy statement, no?
    If this sounds like your bag of candy, go here --

    For now, all I can tell you is if you live anywhere near this crud hole we call New York City, make sure to be down in the basement of The Cakeshop (152 Ludlow between Stanton and Rivington ) this Friday (April 21) when Midwest-cum-Bushwick psychsters Awesome Color share the stage with Northern Massachusetts’ sexiest sludge rockers, The Believers. It’ll be a love fest to end all love fests. I recommend donning ’protection’ prior to leaving the house. You have been warned…

    Friday, April 07, 2006

    NEW YORK AND LONDON PAIR WITH EUNUCHS...EVERYBODY TALK ABOUT ROBIN SCOTT... Above -- Rettman looks into the window of the future and sees this image; still confused.

    If memory serves me right, my seventh birthday party wasn’t the greatest of occasions. Sometime early in the proceedings, I was stung right in the face by a bee and some kid wet his pants just so he could go home early. Not only that, but a family member decided to play ‘deejay’ for the soirée. Plenty of dummy kids and their dummy parents were serenaded and marinated to the strains of such hits of the day as ‘Hey Saint Peter’ by Flash and the Pan and ‘Straight Lines’ by New Musik. And then of course, there was the incessant spinning of ‘Pop Musik’ by M. Whenever I hear that track, my brain soaks itself in bee juice and kiddy urine to remind me of what a shit start I had on this life. So, when I heard a few years ago that the ‘mastermind’ behind ‘Pop Musik’(Robin Scott) cut a record of acidic folk rock for the highly collectable and totally awesome Head label in the late 60’s, I was sorta puzzled. The record was always out of my price range when I would see it in Euro record lists. I’m not too sure of the exchange rate in Ratland, but I was pretty sure I didn’t have the equivalent of 2000 ganips in the bank. This situation really started to irritate me when I found out his backing band on this album was none other than Mighty Baby, a late 60’s U.K. hippy band held in the highest esteem by me and probably about three other beard wearing wanderers. Well, sometimes good things DO come to those who wait…and wait…and wait. The Sunbeam label just re-issued the thing (Entitled ’Woman From The Warm Grass’) on tinfoil and it lives up to all my bad toothed hippy dreams in some aspects. The tunes where Scott is backed by the Babe are spectacular stoned out grooves with MB guitarist Martin Stone practically bleeding his soul out. The English take on the west coast laid-backed-smoke-a-garbage-bag-full-of-weed sound will always prevail in my Anglo fixated mind, folks…sorry. The tracks where it’s just Robin and his acoustic can be affectively brooding, but nothing that’ll make you make up some lost love to weep about. I mean, why dole out the cash for this when you can buy the double ‘Early Years’ set of Al Stewart for a couple bucks at your local basement shoppe? His imitation of Dylan on a few tracks sometimes rivals Mike Hart, but that’s just sometimes. An interesting artifact? Sure. But let’s just say I’m glad I never gave Paul Major my first born for this. Then I would have to convince myself it was great.

    Robin Scott - ‘Woman From The Warm Grass’ available through --

    In the past week, when I’ve been ignoring paying bills or attention to the outside world, these are the things that have been entertaining me -- (dudes, you gotta update this bloggo more often! I need more!) (the greatest blog ever? perhaps…)

    …And finally, I give you the wit and wisdom of the man I consider both my soul mate and guiding light in life…

    There we go…just how I like it…short, sweet and to the point. Dig on it or go dig a grave…

    Friday, March 31, 2006

    THE GHOST OF WALTER GLASER HAUNTS THE WINGS OF MY GHOST DAD...SEND HELP! Above -- Son of Earth trio causing mass destruction opening for Bulldoze, Marauder and Fury of V. Photo credit -- B.J. Puppies

    Just when I was ready to don my beehive wig and let you know the real me via a lengthy discourse on Evie Sands, Peanut and The Goodees, this brand spankin’ new tape from Violent Students plopped it’s way through the mail slot and into the deck. Sounding like it was recorded on a ninth generation Realistic C-60, this cassette entitled ‘Bitchy Woman’ (get it? get it?) further extenuates The Studs non - existent curves and displays them for the solid block of grey, grey meat that they are. Someone yells at a black chick. Some dude throws up. It’s heavy, man. Dig it up via the Maim and Disfigure label.

    But it hasn’t been all vomit and racial slurs around the boudoir lately. No surrey bobcat. This new CDR release by the Son of Earth trio entitled ’Erotic Empire’ has made sure of that. As some of you might know, the S.O.E. are capable of creating sounds that are barely there and only sonically readable by their pulse and presence. This new batch of jams kicks it up a few notches. We’re not talkin’ Montrose or anything, but the electro-squeals are abit more apparent and all the twinkling/tinkling sounds alittle more aggressive. Dare I also say it all sounds sorta…sexy? You know, the kinda sex you would have in a dank cave on a pile of scrap metal. And we all know that kinda relations is the best kind of relations. Why dontcha mosey on over to the Apostasy site and score one of these chumps, chump. P.S.-- If you reside in the Canadian area, be sure to check out the love sludge rawk of The Believers (Two out of three S.O.E. members in that unit, y’know) as they strangle their way through your town with Sunburned Hand of the Man. Dates? I got ‘em -- March 31 --Montreal/April 1 -- Montreal/ April 2 -- Ottawa

    I don’t know where your asshole self resides, but from where I’m sittin’, Spring is coming on full and strong. As the windows open wider and the beer gets drunk earlier in the day, I need a soundtrack for this new lease on life. Luckily this copy of the Howlin’ Rain CD came in the post on the sunniest day thus far to make life just THAT MORE livable. Ethan from Comets on Fire and John Maloney of Sunburned Hand of the Man team up to produce the most legit beard swayin’ tracks to come out since The Suntanama decided to sequester themselves in the uptown lab. Shit…is that Ethan bustin’ out the Terry Reid impersonation that would make Chris Robinson hide in shame? Is Maloney bustin’ out some sweet Mick Fleetwood beats? Total good time jams for the gold tinted station wagon. And remember…don’t be afraid to Poco.

    Sometimes beauty comes in strange places. The weirdest place I’ve experienced such exquisiteness has been on this new Religious Knives single (‘Blackbird’ b/w ‘Wax and Flesh’) The destruction of past experiences has been put aside for ghostly, head spinning tracks sure to wake you from dreaming destruction on all and everyone…but that could be just me. The A Side finds Maya’s voice soaring and soaring into the phony heavens while Mikey plucks, scrapes and drops various stringed thangs in a reenactment of Black Lodge rituals. Flipside’s got a fog of droning organs and delayed beats that bring to mind mountain tops I never really knew. Rad. Hey man, bliss is cool again!

    And while we’re on both the bliss and Heavy Tapes tip…Mike gave me a whole satchel of new HT jams a few weeks ago. I must admit I’ve been listening to the second side of Fleetwood Mac’s ’Mirage’ too much to really delve into the whole batch, but the cassette that’s really stunned me thus far has been Family Underground’s ’Risen Under Altar Souls’. It seems every F.U. thing I’ve had the pleasure of hearing thus far has been a mystifying experience. Delay mania and slowly enveloping pulses might be old hat to some, but it’s the way they just throw things in out of fucking nowhere to break the tranquility that intrigues me. I think these kids might be honestly insane, and that’s why I love them. And its’ also why I love you…and you…but not you…you smell like whiskey and Demerol on a bad day. Yuck…

    Do you remember when we used to hang out and we knew what it was all about? Of course you don’t! But for those who do, step right up to Mike Simonetti’s NYHC flyer fanzine. Man, I’ve known who Simo was before shit became shampoo. He was the ‘Supertouch’ kid! Always hanging from Mark Ryan’s sweatshirt hood begging to sell shirts for the band. Little did I know this kid would become the biggest tycoon in screamo-core. I shoulda been nicer to the dude. But man, he assembled this ‘zine of flyers from Hardcore shows in the late 80’s and it’s the total obvious trip down memory lane for this old, pathetic man I call me. I could go on and on about half these shows, but I don’t wanna bore you and I figure you all know what I’m gonna say by now. Good times…great oldies! I never got into that Project X show at the Lismar Lounge, tho’… Simo did. That kinda fries my fanny. Ugh.

    As usual, most of these titles are available through the Fusetron site. Go there and give Chris all your money. He needs new binoculars. Next time, I’ll talk big shit and think I’m the best. Please…put me to the test…

    Tuesday, March 21, 2006


    Once upon a time, I was an eager young man brimming with enthusiasm and hope. Wudda dummy thing to admit to. Somewhere around 1996 or so, I decided to totally ditch my britches on my Hardcore past and start this Psychedelic avant garde scum bucket type fanzine named The 200 Pound Underground. Wudda dummy move. A lot of people have shown interest in seeing the early issues from this time period, but I don’t gots. I guess as space/time/food permits, I will put up some of my ‘personal favorites’ from issues 1 through 3. I know this isn’t the same thing as holding the actual issue in your precious little hands. Tough crap. Accept loss forever and you’ll be the better man.

    Somewhere in the Spring of 1997, Jim McCarthy (formerly of The Godz) came into a record store a relative works in to take some photographs. Somewhere between the photos being snapped and the car being started, Jim’s phone number was taken down and I met up with a day or so later. I don’t remember too many details from the interview other than he wanted to get back to his apartment to yell at the handyman for installing the wrong handles on his kitchen cabinets. As usual, I am a fountain of information.

    Looking back, I see alotta cringe worthy things. A lack of punctuation, a fumbling lack of research (I really should of axed more questions about his solo LP, ‘Alien’) and a totally confusing earnestness. How the road lead from there to here, I’m totally perplexed by. If you can tell me how I went from this to that in fifty words or less, I will ride a winged serpent into your kitchen for Flag Day. No shit…

    I include the original introduction from the ‘zine as proof…

    In April of this year (1997) a blood relative of mine ran into Jim McCarthy at a local record shop. Luckily, Mr. McCarthy was cool enough to give out his phone number for a possible interview and the next thing I know I’m on the 2nd floor of some typical NYC deli having lunch and rapping with the man himself. I tell ya, sometimes it’s a sweet life. If you have yet to discover The Godz music, it’s imperative you do so immediately. Their sound reached beyone rock boundaries to scrape it’s fingernails on the walls of the great unknowable. They were soulful, chaotic, heartfelt and obnoxious all in one album. It was their music that moved Lester Bangs to scrawl down the immortal words ’Sometimes less is more’. Their first 3 releases (’Contact High’/’Godz 2’/’3rd Testament’) are the best place to start. For the less discerning types, might I also recommend Jim McCarthy’s solo LP, ’Alien’. It’s certainly not a free formed freak out, but it is an absolutely lovely little record (probably one of my all time fave ESP’s) rich with loose ’Basement Tapes’ like vibes and it’s complete with Jim doing his best Gary Brooker imiation. All the Godz records as well as ’Alien’ are available on CD via ESP XYZ and are most likely sitting in your local hipster records shop awaiting your consumption.

    Jim McCarthy: So what do you want to know?
    200LBU: I guess you all worked at a Sam Goody’s together, right?
    JM: Three of us did. Me, Paul and Larry worked there. Jay Dillon we met through Larry. He (Jay) was originally a painter. He also sold marijuana to pay the rent so that’s the main reason we hooked up with him. (Laughter)
    200LBU: So when did you originally get together to make music?
    JM: I was living at Larry’s house. I had just got out of the hospital with a case of hepatitis and had broken up with the woman I was living with, so I had to move out of her place and live with Larry temporarily. It was a pretty depressing time for me.
    200LBU: Oh really? You couldn’t tell that by the first record (obvious sarcasm followed by laughter)
    JM: Yeah…so me, Larry and Paul were hanging out one afternoon, getting high and there were all these percussive instruments lying around and out of total frustration, I got up and starting shaking a tambourine or something like that, and that’s how it all started. We all started to get up and make noise like a bunch of maniacs, expressing our frustration. Paul played guitar, Larry didn’t play anything at the time and he was working at ESP as a sales manager and he said ’Oh Bernard Stollman would love this!’ and I thought he was crazy. Up until that point, I had been in bar bands playing top 40 covers. I actually cut a record with one of them, The Dick Watson Five. The record was called ’Baker Street’ and it was our take on a Rock ’N’ Roll Broadway show. It’s pretty obscure. It doesn’t even have our names on it. I left the band because I saw The Fugs play and I was inspired by them. The reality of their music caught me and I thought ’Why am I fucking around singing other peoples’ songs when I should be expressing my own feelings?’ So I left the Dick Watson Five with no plans at all, and when we did that thing the one afternoon, it felt right and I was ready for it. So we started writing songs and then we would improvise on them. We auditioned for Bernard Stollman over the telephone.
    200LBU: Really?
    JM: We just called him up and were like ’Hey Bernard, check this out’ and we played some weird shit over the phone to him and he loved it. He gave us 2 hours of studio time to record a single and we ended up recording the whole ’Contact High’ album in that session. We recorded all the songs from beginning to end. Exactly the way you hear it.
    200LBU: Was there anyone else besides The Fugs that inspired you at the time?
    JM: Mostly English bands like The Beatles and The Stones, but it was The Fugs that definitely turned my head around. We lived in the same area as them and the whole mood of the Lower East Side at the time was right for us starving artistic types. I was searching my soul for truth and found it in what I did.
    200LBU: Did you have connection with the Velvet Underground?
    JM: When I was in the hospital for hepatitis, I was in the same ward as Lou Reed. He had hepatitis as well. Mine was infectious, his was serum. This was before either of us had recorded our first albums. We used to get together to smoke cigarettes in this little room outside the ward. We would listen to the radio and I remember his favorite song at the time was ’Red Rubber Ball’ by The Cyrkle and mine was ’I Want You’ by Dylan. After he got out of the hospital, I was walking from the east side to the west side and we both walked towards one another but didn’t say anything. When the first Velvet Underground record came out, I realized who he was and I found out that he had ’Contact High’ and liked it, so we had this mutual appreciation society. He hung out once in awhile and we played with the Velvet Underground at some place out in Long Island called the Action House. It was a big concert with The Ronnettes, The Rascals, and a few others. They had 2 or 3 stages set up for the bands to play and it was a very weird scene. I have vague memories of it because I was pretty stoned. The last time I saw Lou was after the ’Transformer’ record came out and I ran into him at Max’s one night and we just talked.
    200LBU: Did you guys have any connections with LaMonte Young?
    JM: (Confused look) Who?
    200LBU: The Theatre of Eternal Music?
    JM: (Same confused look) No. We hung out at a club called The Scene. The Scene was a hang out place for models and musicians and people would just get up and jam. Hendrix used to hang out there.
    200LBU: Did you feel any kinship with the more rock based ESP bands like Holy Modal Rounders or Pearls Before Swine?
    JM: Pearls we didn’t really care for much, but Holy Modal Rounders were cool. The ESP offices were on Fifth Street and they had a room across the hall from the offices that they were supposed to set up as a studio, but it never happened.
    200LBU: How steady of a live band were The Godz?
    JM: We played in every club in the city at least once, because after the first time, no one wanted us back. We auditioned at a club called The Night Owl which is where The Lovin’ Spoonful got their break. I’ll never forget the afternoon we auditioned, because we went into ’White Cat Heat’ and the door opened and the bouncer who was standing outside opened the door and looked at us with such incredible disbelief. It was something you had to see. Needless to say, we didn’t get the gig. We played Folk City in it’s original location. Café Wha?, Café A Go Go. I remember the Café A Go Go gig because we were thrown out of there for smoking grass in the dressing room.
    200LBU: Who were you getting to play with at these shows?
    JM: Mostly ourselves. The biggest gig we ever got was through a college rep in North Carolina at Duke University. It was after the 2nd album came out, which was our most successful period. We drove down and they put us up in these rooms over the library for the weekend. We played the Civic Center in Durham and it was a great show. There was a pretty good local blues band that opened for us and they were baffled out of their minds at why we had top billing over them (laughter)
    200LBU: So you were known outside of the NYC area at the time?
    JM: Yeah, but we’re more popular now than we ever were then.
    200LBU: Well that’s the way it always goes.
    JM: Most of our biggest fans weren’t even born then.
    200LBU: I wasn’t. Did you ever check out that Godz tribute record?
    JM: On Lissy’s? Yeah, I like it.
    200LBU: (Disapproving face)
    JM: Why? What’s wrong with it?
    200LBU: I’m just not too into those bands.
    JM: I’m just amazed someone took the effort to replicate the spirit of our music. The thing that amuses me the most is the detail they remember, because we never thought of our music in that way. It just happened.
    200LBU: I was looking at the recording dates on the back of the CD’s last night and it seemed like you guys were just kicking out the records one after another.
    JM: The first one was just like getting out foot in the door. Fortunately, Bernard loved it and put it out immediately and it fit the feeling of the music because everything happened so spontaneously. Even in the music, things just happened and it felt right.
    200LBU: I understand what you mean because The Godz were one of the first bands that helped me come to the realization that what I loved about music was the spirit and not the technicality of it. There’s things happening on those records that aren’t suppose to be happening and they’re creating these intense, heartfelt sounds.
    JM: We certainly let mistakes work in our favor. Art is about taking things that occur and letting them go and seeing what happens, and that goes for any art form. After the first album, our egos really pumped up. Larry kept insisting we were the American version of the Beatles (Laughter) By the second record, we got some decent instruments. Jay got an electric keyboard, Paul got a set of drums, Larry had my bass and I got a nice electric guitar. We played around with those instruments and got a different feel for the 2nd record. It’s the most cohesive. I recently played the CD for someone and I have to say I enjoyed listening to it. I can’t say that about the first one though, I cringe when I hear that album.
    200LBU: Really? I love that record. That was the first Godz record I ever heard. The next one I heard was the third one and I couldn’t believe it was the same band.
    JM: By the third one, we weren’t really a band. Jay had dropped out.
    200LBU: Didn’t he just disappear or something?
    JM: For some reason on another, he didn’t like how things were working out so he just went back to doing what he was doing before the band.
    200LBU: Selling pot?
    JM: No, doing artwork. At the same time, I had just gotten married and my wife was from Philadelphia, so I moved there because my father promised me a job there. I lived there for 6 months and hated it, so I moved back to NYC and we recorded the 3rd album. That record wasn’t done as a group effort, it was separate elements of our own put together. I had a handful of songs and I just went in and did them. The same thing goes for Larry. There was only one full group session.
    200LBU: Was that with the First Multitude?
    JM: We just invited all our friends down to the studio one night. Most of them weren’t musicians and we just told them ‘Play’ and it rambled on. By the time the third record came out, we had broken up and a few years passed. I started to write a lot of my own stuff and I feel that was my most prolific point. I was trying to put a band together and it just wasn’t happening.
    200LBU: What came first ‘Godzundheut’ or your solo album, ‘Alien’?
    JM: I’m pretty sure ‘Godzundheit’ came first. Larry put that one together. I just joined in for a few songs. It wasn’t a Godz record, I’ll let you that. Bernard was begging me to do a solo record and I didn’t want to record for ESP anymore. I wanted to record with a label with a good budget. Finally, I gave in and did it. We did an acoustic session first and I didn’t like it, so I talked Bernard into getting some guys together. The band on ‘Alien’ was basically a pick up band. There was a few guys from the Left Banke on there (Steve Martin and Paul Thorton -- Baroque Pop editor’s note) We ran through the songs once and all the songs on the record were done in the 1st or 2nd take.
    200LBU: Was ESP a well run label?
    JM: Bernard was a musician’s lawyer and he had clients coming in complaining about record labels ripping them off, so Bernard thought ‘Hey, why don’t I rip them off?’ (Laughter) I’m sure he doesn’t see it that way. He played his role in providing a forum for us, though.
    200LBU: Have you stayed in contact with him?
    JM: Yes. He still thinks of himself as a great benefactor. I haven’t received a royalty statement from ESP Disk since the earl 70’s.
    200LBU: You haven’t received royalties from the CD reissues?
    JM: No, Bernard made a deal with XYZ in Germany to press up a shitload of CD’s for a shitload of money and no one has seen anything. I know they’re selling…
    200LBU: It’s pretty ridiculous that he got as much money as you say considering most of those CD’s were mastered right off the vinyl.
    JM: I agree. What happened was when Bernard closed up shop and moved up state he gave the master tapes away to the bands. Larry has the master tapes for some of the Godz records. I’ve got the master tape for ‘Alien’.
    200LBU: Did you get to hang out with the Jazz musicians on ESP?
    JM: Sure. I actually worked as a photographer for Bernard when he wanted file photos for his artists. I shot Marion Brown, Gato Barbieri, etc. Marion Brown and I used to get high on the roof of the ESP building.
    200LBU: So there were no barriers between the Rock and Jazz people in ESP?
    JM: Not at all. The Jazz people dug us because we were improvisational. There was a common ground. We used to run into Sun Ra in the East Village all the time. He was a trip!
    200LBU: I can imagine. Was there anyone besides Lester Bangs who gave you guys a good write up? Maybe when you were around?
    JM: Yeah, but Lester’s thing was the definitive one on The Godz. He really knew where we were coming from. I remember the day I saw that issue of Creem on the news stand. I was working at a clothing store in the East Village and I was out on my lunch break and pick up the new issue of Creem and it reads ‘Lester Bangs on The Godz’. So, I flip through and there’s this huge write up with pictures. Lester and I spoke a few times after that. He then moved to NYC and we got friendly. At the time he was putting together a band and he wanted me to join his band.
    200LBU: Have you ever heard their record?
    JM: No, how is it?
    200LBU: He should of stuck to writing.
    JM: I went to one of their rehearsals and I wasn’t impressed.
    200LBU: So did everyone on ESP have to learn Esperanto?
    JM: Oh man! Bernard wanted us to sing in Esperanto! One time Bernard brought us into his office and he had this old geezer in there and he spoke in this Eastern European accent and he tried to teach us Esperanto and we could’ve cared less.
    200LBU: There was a study that said it would take over 200 years for Esperanto to progress over the entire planet, so it’s obvious Bernard really had a vision. (laughter)
    JM: Oh yeah! It was this exclusive upper society thing to be into Esperanto. (I had to flip the tape at this point and somehow I ended up here…) All we did was try to express our feelings honestly. We wanted to show you didn’t have to be a musical student to express yourself. Jay Dillion was the one who wanted to get intellectual with The Godz. He wanted us to go to school and teach kids how to play music.
    200LBU: What do you think of Larry’s new version of The Godz?
    JM: I think it sucks. Larry is a scary guy.
    200LBU: Mentally or physically?
    JM: Both. Back in the old days, he was real scary. We were good friends and I can’t say that anymore. The last time I saw him I couldn’t stand to be in the same room as him.
    200LBU: How long ago was this?
    JM: Three or four years ago. It was when Bernard tried to get The Godz back together. Apparently he had some gigs lined up for us in Germany and Holland. We did one gig at the Bitter End. The music sounded good but it wasn’t The Godz. We tried to record some songs and it really sucked.
    200LBU: I read a recent interview with Larry and he acted like the Godz never broke up.
    JM: In his mind they never did. He owns the name, so he thinks The Godz owe him. Paul and I were supposed to do something for that Lizzy’s comp but Larry went and did his thing.
    200LBU: That single is really bad.
    JM: I agree. The thing that pisses me off is that’s one of my songs (‘Radar Eyes’)
    200LBU: Do you still write music at all?
    JM: I don’t. I still consider myself a musician and music still means an awful lot to me but I don’t have the need to express myself through music anymore. What happened was, after the solo record so many promises were made as far as support and nothing happened. I just got turned off by music because of the music business.
    200LBU: Do you listen to any recent music?
    JM: I like The Wallflowers a lot. My musical tastes varies, but most new music I can’t get into at all. There’s not enough substance to grab on to. The most disappointing area is R&B. I remember real R&B.
    200LBU: It’s all about convenience. They just throw labels on thins even though it’s hardly what the label conveys.
    JM: I mean, I’m talking Al Green, Wilson Pickett, Otis Redding. THOSE are R&B singers. You hear them and it’s pure emotion. Even Aretha Franklin, one of my favorite singers, is singing shit these days! I’m sure there are bands just as good as them. I just don’t keep up with them.
    200LBU: Well, there’s plenty of bands keeping up the tradition of The Godz. I guess my main problem with that Godz tribute record is most of those bands are well known indie rock bands. The bands who are really sharing something with what you guys did press up their records in editions of 500 and sell them to their friends.
    JM: My basic interest is in roots music. Whether its roots rock, root blues, roots folk. I like all music as long as it’s got an element of soul to it. It doesn’t matter the category, it’s the emotion and that’s what I miss in music today. I go down to New Orleans every year for the Heritage Jazz Festival and to me it’s like Christmas. There’s this tall stage set up on a racetrack and all day long there’s music going on all the stages. You’ll see these old guys who probably have a job as a dishwasher every other day of the year, but that day they’re loved and they’ve been doing this for 40 years. They do it for the love of it, not for the money or the girls. It makes you feel good and others feel good.
    200LBU: Well, that’s what it’s all about.
    JM: Absolutely, man.
    200LBU: It’s one of those things where you can’t really put it into words, it’s just about the feeling.
    JM: Well, you know it when you feel it. I just bought the Al Green anthology last week and I’ve been a fan of his since the beginning. I put this CD on and his music still brings chills to my body and it’s so REAL and that’s what it’s all about.
    200LBU: Weren’t the Godz actually pretty good friends with Procul Harem?
    JM: I still am. The other guys weren’t so much as I was. I bought the 1st Procul Harem record at the same time I bought the 1st David Bowie and the 1st Velvet Underground album. I listened to that 1st Procul Harem records everyday regularly. In ‘68, I was working at the Sam Goody on 49th Street and someone said Procul Harem was staying at the hotel across the street. I went over there and picked up the house phone and asked for Gary Broker and he answered! So I went upstairs and introduced myself and he knew who The Godz were! The band had a photo session a year before at Michael Sullivan’s studio and he played a Godz record while he photographed them. Gary and I hit off as well as B.J. Oswald, one of, if not THEE greatest rock drummers ever. A real strong friendship.
    200LBU: My last questions is an obvious one. I guess drugs played an important role in The Godz’ music.
    JM: Yeah. We smoked grass and hash. We tripped on acid. Did speed occasionally.
    200LBU: From what I’ve read about NYC in the late 60’s, speed was pretty much the drug of choice.
    JM: We didn’t do it that much. We didn’t do acid that much either. Maybe like once a month.
    200LBU: Oh, once a month, that’s it? What was that? Doctors’ orders?
    JM: It was a required thing at the time.
    200LBU: It’s certainly required thing while listening to it.
    JM: It helps!200LBU: I know the first time I heard The Godz, I was incredibly stoned.
    JM: Well, if it’s any consolation to you, Paul still smokes joints like they’re cigarettes.
    200LBU: Yeah…that makes me happy.


    Sometime next time, we'll chat about the new Violent Students cassette on Main + Disfigured and Simos' flyer 'zine and the new Loosers thing on Our Mouth and other stuffs. Until then...don't bother me....I'm mulling...