THE MAN PICTURED BELOW IS A RAPIST -- AN INTERVIEW WITH THE HOMOSTUPIDS

Day in and day out, my mailbox brims with utter crap that I have no use for. Letters telling me what I owe (Good luck getting it, dipshit) and what I need. Those manila enveloped, official looking jobbies that are merely ploys to join some white slavery ring organized by non-profit groups posing as white slavery rings….you know the drill. And then there are those mountains of garbage promo CD’s that can make a good man go bad. How Brian Turner and people of his ilk don’t go up to the nearest bell tower and start picking people off with a high powered rifle while uttering ’So many Jade Tree promos…So many Jade Tree promos’ is beyond me.



But, every once in awhile, a surprise comes in the mailbox that makes it worth putting on pants and leaving the house at dusk. One such surprise is a three song 7” recently released by a group outta Cleveland named The Homostupids. As soon as I opened the anonymous packaging and saw the name of the band and the cover of the single (A real dumbo drawing of a skull with a thunderbolt slashing through it) I was smitten as shit. It was almost like I didn’t have to listen to it! Thank God I did. In this past year, witnessing the utter brutality of units like Philly’s Violent Students and Pissed Jeans, Ohio’s Lambsbread, etc. has given me a giddy spark that the fucked up kids who love The Cro-Mags AND The Brainbombs AND The Dead C. AND Keith Hudson will finally have their say. Throw The Homostupids in that mix of kids. Recorded in the red and out the door, this single has a dunderheaded mean spiritedness that sucks in all the above mentioned sound burglars and shits it out totally splatter effect stylee. You could do no worse than to go to their MySpace page and pick up one or two or the entire pressing. Go to -- http://www.myspace.com/homostupids and shit’ll be sorted.




The following is an interview I conducted here at the 200LBU offices with one Steven Peffer, who claimed to the bass player in The Homostupids. As of ’press’ time, we have no proof. But if you could see the dent he left in our supply of Wild Turkey and all the blood he left on our collection of Bad Brains bootlegs, there’d be no doubt in your mind that this guy was both homosexual AND stupid…read on….




200LBU --Have you seen my pipe?
Steven Peffer :What do you mean? What kind of question is that?
200LBU --Never mind…How and when did you start jamming? Were there any other bands y'all were in prior to the Homostupids? How did you homos get to know one another?
Steven Peffer: Maybe a year and a half ago, I had an idea for a band I wanted. Simple repetitive bass lines under thin wanking guitar with simple song structure. I did a 4 track thing and enlisted some help from a friend or two. It came out good, but not what I was shooting for with an actual band idea. That recording will be titled “The Brutal Birthday" e.p. and it will be released as a 7” on Richie Records out of Philadelphia. Anyway, I found 2 dudes I didn't know before hand through just asking around over and over. That's Dale and Josh. They're great and the sound I had in my head kinda morphed into the 3 of us playing whatever it is we're playing, which I guess is very close to what I hoped for. I was listening to the Dwarves "Blood Guts and Pussy" album, The Grabbies and Supercharger. That was kinda the inspiration. I guess that's not a clear answer to your question right?
200LBU --Not even close, but who cares? Where exactly do you live in Ohio? Do you play out a lot?
S.P: We live in Cleveland and I like it here. It’s cheap. Food is cheap and rent is cheap and girls here have nice round full breasts. They don't come to see us though. I don't know what the reaction is. it's hard to gauge something like that I think. People tend to be drunk and dishonest, so I don't know and don't care too much. We just keep to ourselves and play once every other month or so. No other bands here play similar sounding music to us it seems, which me thinks good.
200LBU--If you could back in time to see any band perform live, who would it be and why?
J.P: Maybe when Metallica first got Newsted in the band and they would play secret club gigs as Vertigo. That would be cool! Share a small stage with Kirk and the boys!
200LBU--Yeah, I’m sure Kirk would love sharing a small stage with some boys. Are there any bands around now that you feel some sorta kinship with?
S.P : I don't want to say "kinship" but I like very much The Clockcleaner and Out With A Bang from Italy, also Shoot It Up from California is very good music makers. I like Cococoma from Chicago very much. Who else is good for me? Let's see... Throbbin Urges have an LP on Dead Beat that is over the top and right to the point and loudy too. I like that.
200LBU--How did you become pals with them there Violent Students?
S.P: Well, John jr. is the drummer I think, right? He moved to Cleveland for like 2 years and we were roommates. So I've known him well and good for like 5 years or so. I think he's the one who got me mixing tuna in with macaroni and cheese, which I still do. So he's my ‘in’ with that band. Richie, the basser in VS is a buddy of John Jr. so I know him through him and so on. They are nice dudes and have helped our band quite a bit whether they know it or not. I don't know what Richie's diet is like, but John Jr. doesn't seem to eat as much meat these days. I like the stuff and usually in the summertime I don't eat much meat. The heat limits my appetite, but this year red meat has been on the menu every week just about. Meatball sandwiches, kielbasa, bratwurst, salami, Lebanese bologna. all that shit.
?#6--Um…O.K. So, what are the future plans of Homostupids? Shows? Records?
S.P: Not much I think. We're recording an LP this weekend so we'll see how that goes. We play in town like I said, about once every other month. We have some out of town stuff lined up but we're limited to what we can do. Josh has a wife and a daughter and we don't have much money or reliable transportation. Also, we don’t have much motivation to go out of town and suck each other off or whatever.
200LBU--Again…‘Um, OK…‘ So, who is going to put out this LP? How many tunes will it be?
S.P.: It's kinda up in the air as to who's gonna release it right now. I'd like it to be on both vinyl and disc at the same time, so whoever can do that and pay for the recording wins!! I think it'll be like 10 songs… maybe 12. It depends how many come out the way we like. We'll record 15 songs total though, all live. My friend Paul just built a lovely very accommodating studio and has a large tile bathroom that we will set up in. we'll see how it goes. Blown out I hope.
200LBU--How did you come up with that rad ass name?
S.P: My first year outta high school, I started listening to alot of high energy garage stuff. My friend Stephe and I would eat some acid and for the first wave of it, the speed would slowly ride up. So, during this part we'd jam out Supercharger and The Mummies and shit like that. Jump up and down and sweat, then the mellow paranoid part would come in and outside we'd go. Then, the speed would come back when the mellow washed away and then hell crept in. So, while on the initial speed rush we brainstormed our high energy slop-o stupid as shit inept garage band and it'd be called the Homostupids. There you go. This was 9 years ago. We had one practice and that was it. I folded up the name and kept it in my pocket until I needed it again.
200LBU--Let’s do some word association….Jackson Browne…
S.P:Rapist.
200LBU--Necros
S.P.: Overrated
200LBU--Wait a second..You think the Necros are overrated?
S.P: They are pretty good I guess. I just don't think they are as special as people make them out to be. Don't get me wrong though, they are better than most Ohio Hardcore bands from that time I guess? Better that Articles of Faith... YUK! Lyrically and musically they seem kinda Hardcore by the numbers, that is Necros not AOF. AOF is just plain g-a-y.
200LBU--AOF were from Chicago, but I guess we’ll just skip that…back to the word association…Bella Donna…
S.P: Injun
200LBU-Painkillers…
S.P: Penis
200LBU --Fucked Up…
S.P: Canada
200LBU -- DubStep
S.P: Kit Kat
200LBU -- Neil Young
S.P:Danny Whitten
200LBU: And finally…Max Milgram?
S.P : Penis penis.
200LBU: Very good…end transmission.

I CAN DEAL WITH CHICKS SINGING AND THAT'S ABOUT IT -- PART ONE

A few months back, Jay Hinman called me his bro-in-arms or something regarding our love for the girlie sounds. He wrote something about him and me being the only ‘dorks’ that care. DORKS? Sir, we are not dorks! I’ll tell you who a dork is! A dork is someone who weeps when their CDR limited to 5 gets hosed down by a D.J. just trying to show a crowd abit of fun. A dork is someone who discovered the Circle Jerks last year and then wants to debate on the proper way to mosh during Hair Police. A dork is anyone who writes an eight hundred word review on anything musical. But most of all, a dork is anyone who doesn’t have virtual air conditioning rushing through the cracks in their toes when they hear something as vital and alive as Twinkle’s ‘What Am I Doing Here With You?’ or anything off of ‘Dusty in London’.


Like most things, I don’t consider myself some sorta ’real life’ expert on these sounds. The reason for this could be because of my humble, self-deprecating demeanor. Or it could be because I fear a nation of cardigan sporting dudes who live in their moms’ basements telling me my girl group tastes are ‘pedestrian at best’. Nonetheless, I know what I like’s and that’s all there is to it. On these past days of absolute swelter in the shelter, I cranked up the A.C. as high as it could go, put on my beehive wig and white lipstick and jammed the jams that make women swoon, men shudder and take cattle off their feed. Here’s a sampling --

Dusty Springfield - ‘I Start Counting’
Sort of a cheese bag fusion-like intro kicks this lush one off and then that voice that could sooth the harshest of sun blisters kicks in and makes me wish I had some sorta consistent hook-up on pills that make everything look like a scene outta ‘Casino Royale’. I could never go into the technicality of the actual sounds created here…I’m too much a dolt on that front. All I know is this lady’s voice has made my life seem not so shitty from the deserts of New Mexico to the grey tinged streets of Bed-Stuy. I’ve lifted many a gin and tonic in my living room on a lonely night to her. Maybe you should do the same…just make sure no one’s around.

Val McKenna - ‘House for Sale’
Like I stated above, I don’t claim to be some know-it-all on this shit. Most of my ‘knowledge’ of it comes off the beyond excellent ‘Dream Babes’ compilations that the ever lovin’ RPM label has been shooting out over the past few years. All I know is Val busted out some singles in the mid-60’s with James Page on them that are quite stellar. This one isn’t as dreamy as some of the other jams that’ll be listed. Even though it’s got kind of a sad vibe to it, this tune’s gotta hip movin’ feel about it that might get you either sympathy sex or two minutes on the dance floor with an actual girl. The decision is up to you.


The Caravelles - ’Hey Mama You’ve Been On My Mind’
Another one off a ’Dream Babes’ comp (Volume Five) that’s like a gush of strong sea air rushing through my constantly retreating hairline. Total limey Spector worship done by two London office girls that went by the names Lois Lane (!) and Andrea Simpson. This track mixed with a little weed, and a little a.c. will make you feel like you’re in heaven…or at least in someone else’s living room.


The Supremes - ‘I Wish I Was Your Mirror’
I don’t care what anyone sez…the Ross-free era of The Supremes is staggering. The whole record this one comes off of (‘New Ways But Love Stays’) is a blurring trip of good vibes. It could be World War Three outside while this song is on and I’d still be all smiles. Have you ever seen me smile? It’s quite an occurrence when it happens….trust me.


Twinkle - ‘Take Me To The Dance’
Hinman wasn’t too impressed with ole Twinkie, but I think she’s the Brit girl shit. Most of her self penned tunes are heart string pullers about boy pals dying in motorcycle crashes and the like, but ‘Take Me To The Dance’ is a groover about nothing but the simple joys of being out and about with a person whose company you can tolerate for more than five minutes. I wish I could find that sorta bliss…

Abit ‘cut-off’ I agree, but I got more writing to do, hairs to be cut, rooms to be cleaned, and Odyssey records to listen to. If you’re in the Brooklyn area tomorrow (8/5) come on down to the Hook in Red Hook. Monotract is having a party for the release of their CD on Ecstatic Peace, ‘Xprmntl Lvrs’. So far, it’s one of my favorite things I’ve heard all year. It makes my hips move like rubber wheels and I can’t say that about much else out there. You’ll also get the chance to check out Magik Markers, Mouthus and the NY premiere of Canada’s Panopiticon Eyelids, another thing that’s sure to turn your socks to shit. DJ’s will be DJ Beard, DJ Gray and DJ Gaye. See you there…