200LBU

2009-02-21T14:10:00.000-08:00

WHAT CAN I SAY? YOGA CLASS IS STRESSFUL!

Where have I been? The question is where the fuck have you been? Cause I know where I've been, pal. Stacking beers inbetween the screen door and house door of celebs, toking doobage with members of Violent Apathy...you know, the usual shit. I've also been staring at this flyer for hours on end wondering how this show would of went down. It never did (of course) but the idea of hearing 'Outcast' in the same night as seeing Tomata Du Plenty is too much for even my jaded as shit brain to handle. Shit, I woulda sat through Jerry Vile & The Boners to see this...and that's sayin' somethin'.

So..so...oh yes. I guess this Eskimo King CD-R named 'Satelite Decisions' has been on the market for awhile now, but I just stole it a few nights ago, so bear with me sweetcheeks. I know you and you're thinking 'Side project of Mouthus? My guess is cock splewey noise and I've heard that already'. All I gotta say is you're a douche nozzle supreme, jack. The first half of this disc is some pretty dope sketches of acoustics and keyboard that sound like 'Close to the Edge' fed through the brain of a tin pooping robot. The later half gets electric and certainly loudy, but it's not like it's scary or nutin'. In fact, I'd say it's roar is down right fuzzy. The perfect balance of the bitter and the sweet. Can you dig it? If you can't, please go and purchase a Porcupine Tree dildo. Ouch! That smarts, Boyd! http://ourmouthrecords.com/

If I've listened to anything more than the unreleased Violent Apathy 7" (do I sense a theme here?) it's been this disc by the Netherlands #1 Satan worshipping act, The Devils' Blood. Again, this band might be old hat to you hip young black clad thangs, but they're news to my old, dumpy jeaned self. I've listened to this disc - entitled 'Come Reap' - more than a few times now, and I'm still sorta confused. Jefferson Airplane on a dose of the Devil's blotter? This reeks not one iota of any rock music made within the past 30 years and that might be why it's such a winner. Who out there is going to go see them open for Pentagram? I might be tempted if someone promises freshly baked cookies right after they play. I'm looking at you Liebling! http://www.allthatisheavy.com/info.asp?item_num=ATH-5606

Uh..,that's pretty much all I got right now. Expect more and more sporadic postings as I work more and more on my book. I guess in the time being, make up your shit or read more Kanye West interviews. God knows they're more interesting and hilarious than I could ever hope to be.

2009-01-23T12:03:00.000-08:00

I'VE NEVER FELT ASHAMED FOR HAVING NOTHING TO DO OK..here goes. Been trying to get the first stages of the Detroit Hardcore book out of the way. Lotsa interviews and lotsa procrastinating on some of the interviews. Lots of Kombucha and wheatgrass. Lotsa bathroom breaks. All I know is it's been way more fun to listen to these records than update this bloog --

Egg - 'The Polite Force' (Deram)
Eric Burdon & The Animals - 'Winds of Change' (MGM)
Frank Sinatra - 'Watertown' (Reprise) (The record that makes 'Berlin' sound like The Association. Suck it long and hard, Louis!)
Camel - 'Mirage' (Deram)
This Heat - 'Repeat' (These)
Der Teenage Panzerkorps - 'Games for Slaves' (Siltbreeze)
GBH - 'Leather, Bristles, Studs & Acne' (Clay)
Various Artists - 'Sunday Sunshine - The World of SNB Records' (RPM)
Caravan - 1st lp (Verve Forecast)

2008-12-04T08:58:00.000-08:00

SMOKING MENTHOLS AND EATIN' KOBE BEEF NEVER TASTED SO GOOD -- AN AFTERNOON MEDITATION ON PUSSYGUTT AND STORY OF RATS Despite my undying love for the Virgin Prunes and the sporadic donning of black eyeliner before I head down to the local Key Foods, I'm not that 'dark' of a guy. Although I'm obviously down with the drone, Sunn and all their followers never made sense to me. It just seemed they took a great sound and dumbed it down for metalers and other mouth breathing types by adding alotta horseshit to it. Whenever I see a black record cover with silver ink, I usually fall asleep by the time I have a chance to laugh at the band name and/or record title. Hey...whatever floats your rod in the water and puts asses in the seats, I guess.

When and if I do throw some sounds on in this bunker these days, it's usually something I'm familiar with and/or something that doesn't require too much listener/sound participation. Alittle A.F. when the tub needs a hard scrub, some Dusty when some wine is being sipped and spilled, etc. New vibrations don't get too much spin time 'round here, but once in awhile someone will slip me something they think I'd like and I throw it on and by god, they're right to think I'd dig it. Such is the case with this double LP entitled 'Sea of Sand', a collaborative effort between Boise, Idahos' Pussygutt and Seattles' Story of Rats. I was firstly taken with how beautiful the package was. A jet black gatefold with paste-on artwork that must of been glued on by the most OCD person in the universe; totally immaculate. The sounds that take up both these slabs are certainly heavier than a two ton turd, but it's an effortless vibration that seems to just naturally permeate from the sound. The first record in the set sounds like it was one continuous jam spread out between the sides. For most of it, the amps humm and purr as if they themselves (not the humans in the room) are actually waiting for the riffs and drums to kick in. When they do show themselves, they're perfectly brief and direct and burrow back into the clouds of roar to await their next outing. Since I didn't look at the clock once while both of these sides heaved mighty grey smoke from their surfaces, I'm supposing this record must be good.

An actual violin played like it actually should be played opens Side C while field recordings of dry leaves crunch off in the distance. Somewhere down the line (Once again, I lost track of time) strings ring open and randomly hang/float, making me think more of the Dead C. than former members of False Liberty in bathrobes. Side D is heavy, slow and minimal but in a pretty engaging way. It might be that my ears are tuned differently, but when I hear this slow sludgy thing done right, I envision the songs that closed out both Infest 7"s going on forever like I wished them to all those years ago. Somewhere in all the strumming and clanging, in comes the ringing of bells and the quacking of ducks in the far distance and the record is over.

It's been awhile since I've actually got lost in a record; let alone a double set. These people have actually put together a record that's an experience; something you can't just make the bed and sweep the floor to. Put it on, sit down and take it in, chief.

P.S. -- Do not handle this cover after the eating of greasy foods. You'll just ruin it.

2008-12-01T04:59:00.000-08:00

SOME OF MY FAVORITE STOLEN THINGS PART ONE...The quote below was stolen from Ronny Little's Barebones Hardcore blogspot. The interview was posted back in '05, but it was ripped off by me circa now...

Porcell -- One of the first times I ever went to CB's was to see Agnostic Front (before United Blood was out), Death Before Dishonor (Mark Supertouch and Mike Judge's first band), Balls (Don Fury's band) and Skinhead Youth (Alex Cause For Alarm's skinhead band with Raybeez on vocals). I took the train in from my nice upper middle class whitebread neighborhood and let me tell you, that was the sketchiest, scariest crowd I had seen in my life at that point. I was practically the only kid in the pit with hair! Skinhead Youth came out and played racist songs like "Black Plague" and had a song about fag bashing, which they dedicated to Harley (who wasn't even in the Cro Mags at that point but was somehow still the star of the scene). I was like "I'm not in the suburbs anymore man!" While DBD was playing, I was moshing and I felt something hitting me repeatedly in the back of the head. At first I thought it was random elbows until I turned around and saw Jimmy Gestapo in construction gloves staring me down, I guess he didn't like my skater cut. Then AF took the stage, and for some odd reason Matt Dillon (of "There's Something About Mary" fame) was in the crowd, he was all punked out like a poser with a trenchcoat, boots and a bandana around his head. AF dedicated a song to "that f'ing faggot Matt Dillon who better get his ass back uptown if he knows what's good for him!" Needless to say, he left. AF were so incredible, people were losing their minds singing along, it was all these sketchy inner city kids who lived on the streets and you could tell this was all they had, it was intense. Then to top it off, as I was exiting, a guy named Tony Ultraviolence beat up a skinhead named Steve Hate with a wine bottle, splitting his head open. High school seemed really boring on Monday morning.

2008-11-23T06:37:00.000-08:00

UNLESS HE'S STEVE ALLEN, WALTER'S STEALIN' MY BIT!

Although I don't know how to feel about his twee version of 'Society Suckers', I gotta admit Walter Schreifels hit the nail on the frickin' head here with this quote of his I stole off the Radio Silence site --

'Hardcore is American folk music at heart, celebrated and imitated around the world, like Levi’s, Coca Cola, Airports and Spaceships. It’s influence continues to be felt not only in music but in art, fashion and graphic design. Ian MacKaye is our Woody Guthrie, Agnostic Front our Carter Family.'

Right on N.D!!!

On a non-Hahdcaw note, the new season of Russell Brand's Ponderland started a few weeks ago over the pond. Hey...I guess I'm a moron 'cause I still find the guy funny, even with the Adam Sandler connections and crank calls and huge hair and all. Here's a lazy YouTube link to a good 'un -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lv5IWwSOTLA&feature=related

And that is all.

2008-11-21T16:28:00.000-08:00

PUNK ROCK NERD Q&A = A FATE WORSE THAN DEATH
Above -- A huge Tom Trocolli's Dog fan poses a question to Joe Carducci last night at the Spoonbill and Sugartown book store in totally gay Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Just thought I'd drop by and let you know about a few things a brewin' (if you care) I did my part in getting the word out on Joe Carducci coming to Brooklyn to read. Check out all I done did here --http://www.villagevoice.com/2008-11-19/books/sst-to-bklyn-joe-carducci-speaks/

and here -- http://www.swingsetmagazine.com/pages/index.php

An article I did up on the A7 reunion going on at the Knitting Factory next month will be running in the Voice the first week of December. In the past week I got to talk to Johnny Waste, Jerry Williams, Jimmy Gestapo and Jism from Ism for the piece. Wudda life!

Check out the new 'Icons' issue of Swindle for an interview I did with Penelope Houston. They don't have the piece on line, but you can order from their website if you live under a rock and can't buy it near you – http://swindlemagazine.com/

What else...what else...The Detroit Hardcore article that ran in Swindle last year is being turned into a book. I have signed my life away to a certain publisher and I have to deliver in a years' time or I will be subjected to listening to End of a Year and Whirlpool until my ears bleed. Anyone out there who thinks they got something that'll be good for the book and wasn't used in the article, get in touch.

That's all I got for now. Just wanted you guys to know how great I am.

2008-10-16T08:39:00.000-07:00

HEY! LET'S ALL GO DOWN TO THE SODA SHOPPE WHILE THE MEXICANS TAKE OVER THE COUNTRY!
Sometimes when I'm bored, I will still listen to new music and try to evaluate it. I find the task to be mind numbing and pointless. Who cares what I think and why should I write about the few records I purchase these days? I'd rather sit here and ponder on the second season of '30 Rock' now that it's on DVD and wonder why Tracy Morgans' character seems so called in and distant from how great it was in the first season. Just mutterings of stupid sayings and catch phrases. I'm not saying the whole shebang is a dud. Quite the opposite, but it just don't feel like the first time, Mr. Foreigner. We all know second seasons are hard to work with, just like second albums. You're expected to top your first offering whether or not it blew the roof off the sucker. I read a quote once by Bruce Springsteen that read something about how easy it is to create when no one is paying attention and you're wishing they were. When 'they' are paying attention, you wish they weren't so you wouldn't be so hung up on pleasing 'them'. Who knew the king of the boss liquid was so plugged in. I wonder if he said that before or after losing his 45 of 'Mountain of Love' in Landaus' bunghole. Oh my! Snarky rock critic references! I certainly have come full circle to eat my own tail, haven't I? Anywhos, I guess some people got their second album right; so right it muted the first one out of the water. Let's see....there's 'Traffic' by Traffic...'Put The Music in it's Coffin'...'Bryter Layter'...I'm sure there's more, but I got a bucket of chicken in front of me I wanna dig into.

I'm old and slow and I just gotta hold of the second seven inch by Swinehood from Sweden and it certainly don't go up in the leagues of the records mentioned above (I'm not that bored...c'mon) but I played it more than twice and contemplated bringing it along when I was asked to D.J. a wine and cheese party Mind Eraser played the other week. Internetting tells me there is some sorta Brainbombs connection here, which would totally thrill me if I got into Hardcore through Floorpunch and just discovered saying the 'N' word can make me feel real naughty. Shit...will I be this nasty when 'the kids' finally pick up a copy of 'Child is Father to the Man' in a dollar bin? Hmm....hopefully by then I'll be too submerged in a fog of sausage makers and the green, green grass of home to care. We'll see. But yeah, this Swinehood stuff sounds pretty legit in it's nasty ass sound. It's hard not to sound studied when playing mean spirited Punk Rock in 2008 (I just discovered that fact actually!) but the shit's got the same feel as that Brainbombs stuff. Not necessarily in sound, but in the 'I think these guys might be serious' feeling that shot down your spinal column the first time you heard 'Lipstick on my Cock' or maybe even 'Megan's Gyspy Eyes' (totally unrelated I know, but the Koop pays me a saw buck a mention if ya didn't know) They/he/whoever is Swinehood gots a new seven inch out, but I haven't got a hold of it. I MySpaced the fucker asking how to get a hold of it and he ignored me like the sellout hippy I am. Eh...I'm sure it'll show up in two years time in someones' distro here in the states while I'm trying to stuff a rabbit into a sausage maker. I'll never know the ending!

Alot of words and phrases get thrown around these days...'Maverick'...'Hockey Mom'...and, most of all, 'Shit-Fi'. As a fan of some of the lousiest Hardcore recordings of the eighties, I'm down with appreciating the sound that has been so easily sown up into a catch phrase, but I think something's got lost along the way. I severely doubt when the Shitlickers or State Children walked into the studio on that fateful day they actually came out and said to the engineer 'Yeah...could you make us sound as lousy as possible? Could you replace that drum set with wet cardboard and tin foil? Oh yeah...also...could you stick a switchblade into my guitar amp's cones? Thank you so much' These recordings were done on the cheap 'cause these guys hadda lack of coin due to cider addiction and other such things. If they had the chance, I'm sure they would of wanted it to sound like a million bucks. For a generation of people who have got the full Lama discography downloaded to their laptop to 'try' to sound shitty is gross to me. This is obviously not a diss towards the website or that Stuart guy or anything like that, so please stop right there.This is just an observation of some shit I have listened to recently when I've been down at the local teen post selling outdated Juji Fruit to ClockCleaner fans, OK? There's no way you can stop the kids, so let 'em ape everything instead of getting gnarly and inventing some new game to fuck up the oldsters. If they're gonna ape anything, why don't they dig on this Van Sac single some nice person did up recently. Apparently this was a demo of some post Anti-Cimex thing from '86 that the Distort label outta Wallington, New Jersey (what?!?) found in a dustbin somewhere and decided more people needed to hear it. Wow...wudda noble effort. As expected, it's total Discharge worship recorded real shitty, which is worth at least five bucks anyway you slice it, but the thing I find real intriguing here is the vocalist who sounds like some drunk off the street making up words as he goes along. Whenever his brain is dry, he just lets out a string of laughter. Twisted beyond the usual 'D-Beat' stuff (my teeth grit as I type that phrase) of both the past and present, this is one to reinstate some faith in turd recording. Only 200 pressed apparently, so jump on it you sexy mouth breather, you.

Damn, this is going on for awhile! Kinda wish I ate that chicken before I started on this...Speaking of studied, I got this Obliteration seven inch sitting here too. Now, before I start, I want you to know when I say 'studied', it's not a bad thing. Personally, I always thought it was how you studied that made the difference. You can be a nerd and ask alotta questions and get things down pat and buy a shitload of expensive records and ask more questions and then think you now know exactly where to put a distorted bass break or a violin scrape or whatever. Or...you could just buy the expensive records, listen to them, absorb them for a year or two and let it fly. That's considered studying too, ya know. It's the difference between Matt Valentine or No Neck....Wooden Wand or Chasny...lemme stop before someone threatens me to a slap fight. So, Obliteration is some members of some big named current Hardcore bands doing up their BritCore tribute, complete with a shitty xeroxed sleeve (there's two to choose from!) and song titles like 'Fascist System' and 'Megatons'. Yeah, it's pretty over the top, but when it boils right down to it...fuck it...it sounds choice. Echoed-out vocals, power mower guitar sound..you know the drill. It still seems weird to me that someone has to make a record like this; a record that looks and sounds a certain way. At one point in time, people just put out records like this, period. Do you get my drift? Nonetheless, I'm glad someone is putting out a record that looks and sounds like this. I dig it and that is that.

OK...I can't take it anymore. I need to eat this chicken. Everyone buy the Radio Silence book and don't listen to anything I write or say. I'm a just a handsome dude who is never content and flies off the handle too much over shit he claims he doesn't care about. I could go on more about bands I've never heard and how much I hate them, but again...I got the chicken here...

Props to those who wish this was a joke....

2008-08-29T12:16:00.000-07:00

YOUNG, DUMB AND FULL OF FEAR OF WOMEN Above is a younger version of myself somewhere I most likely shouldn't of been at my age. Dig the Bodies In Panic graffiti slighty obscurred in the background! I have no idea why my right eye looks like it was sown shut, but it could of been because I talked too much smack about either Chronic Smog or Neurotic Impulse. I really can't recall at this codger like moment in my life. Thanks to Ken Salerno for digging this image up and reminding me that once upon a time, I was actually much smaller.

200LBU TOP 5 AS OF 8/29/08

1) Bread 'n' butter pudding at the Blue Pig Tavern in CMNJ
2) Pale Saints - 'The Comforts of Madness' (4AD)
3) Red Eyes - 'Demo '02' (self - released)
4) Tornado Dog at Hot Dog Tommy's in CMNJ ('Big Bad' style of course!)
5) Underwear Jones - 'Nude Renaissance Faire Blues' (WFOT)

2008-08-22T09:15:00.000-07:00

CAN YOU SMELL WHAT THE BUCK IS COOKIN'???Finally, a fucking new release worth giving a shit about. On September16th, Lindsey drops a new jam named 'Gift of Screws' and I couldn't be more excited. Fuck all your pre-meditated faves in faggy Donovan hats and bow down to the OG one-man band weirdo. Expect live appearences, talk show things and all such bizz. Can't wait to see the man on the tube and what have you. Should be a great time just to be alive.

On a completely unrelated note, how come no one told me about this Garage D'or label re-releasing all the Reflex tape comps on CD? It says here on the Kill from the Heart site that these things have been out since 1997? Where was I? More importanly, WHERE WERE YOU? In the words of Sir Ian MacKaye 'Thanks alot, friends...'

I was always curious about these tape compilations Bob Mould did up on his label in the early 80's and now (better late than never) I can check 'em out. A mish-mash of dumbo thrashers, art punkins and various uncatagorizable unknowns rub ashy Midwestern elbows on both the discs, 'Barefoot and Pregnant' and 'Kitten'. I can't say these discs have given me any answers to any of life's questions, but I can say they've made me grin here and there...which is something.

The 'Barefoot and Pregnant' one starts off with some tracks from the pre-Soul Asylum Loud Fast Rules. They are neither loud nor fast, and they certainly do not rule. I mean, Jesus...this shit makes 'Runaway Train' (George Wendt mix) sound like Straight Ahead. The super underappreciated duo of Rifle Sport and Man Sized Action turn in some great live tracks of their off - kilter Midwestern meets Manchester style while this Lou Santacroce fellow sticks out like Harry Chapin at a Suburban Mutilation gig. Mecht Mensch got some decent live cuts and then there's the unknown-to-me Red Meat who might be my favorite out of both the discs here. Let's just say if you could teleport them to 2008, there'd be a pretty vicious slap fight among the new weird punkers on whose new weird punk label was gonna release their single in an edition of 300.

The 'Kitten' one seems to have abit more Hardcore damage than 'Barefoot..' with lots of one-off generic types taking up most of the space, although Tom Hazelmyers teenage thrash act Todlachen sound totally hot, dumb, fast and fumbly (all my favorite things!) Supposedly they recorded a 7" for Reflex back in '82 that never saw the light of day. What the hell? Unleash those tapes Mould or I'll play 'Man on the Silver Mountain' at you 'til your butt and ears bleed. I remember those Ground Zero and Willful Neglect records being pretty cruddy when I was kid, but their tracks on here aren't so bad. They are not as great as the Todlachen ones, but they have that same crumbly generic thrash feel and sound pretty inspiring blaring out right now. Inspiring enough to track down their records again? Hell no! For now, they sound dumb, young and scarred of girls and that's AOK for this time of the morn. Red Meat make another showing on here and stick to their disturbed throb thang and sound pretty fucked in the process. The Huskers tracks on this one are choice and unheard. 'Drug Party' is just silly and 'It's Not Fair' ends with a long feedack drone that would make you think Surface of the Earth landed somewhere on your deck. For the Todlachen tracks alone, you should own this.

http://www.garagedor.com/old.html

Until then, all I gotta say is 'Sticky toffee pudding'.

2008-07-13T11:53:00.000-07:00

DIS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THE JUG IS PLUGGED FOR TOO LONG...The word ‘bitter’ has been thrown around to describe me in the past few months and I gotta say I’m more than a little teed off about it. I’m certainly paranoid…but bitter? Isn’t anyone allowed to just be bored anymore? Most new sounds that people recommend don’t move me, plain and simple. I know right now your licking your lips waiting for me to rail off a list of disapproved one-manned flavors of the month, but I’m not gonna give ya that satisfaction. If ya dig ‘em, good on ya. Buy up all the cassettes and seven inches and whatever and be happy as a pig in plop (sic) I’ll be content with turkey stew, a cold shower and repeated listenings to ‘Going Blank Again’, thank ya very mooch.

And, speaking of ‘Going Blank Again’, it is true that I’ve revisited my shoe gazing past these last few months. Records by Prince Valiant hairdo sporting types that were traded in for Free Jazz rarities all so long ago have been re-bought, downloaded, re-issued, re-packaged and re-evaluated like the vulgar pictures they are. Never content with simply enjoying something, I have tried to delve deep into my brainbox as to why now I’ve rediscovered this plop at this particular time. I wouldn’t say it was nostalgia, ‘cause I don’t really remember those post-core neophyte pot smoking days to be all that great. My nineteen year old self in a Gap purchased stripped shirt didn’t really bring out the best of my bulk, so I was always left high ‘n’ dry after the Boo Radleys shows waiting for my ride while my compadres scored phone numbers, drugs and saucy parking lot encounters. Maybe it’s because the music doesn’t necessarily confront me. It could also be the fact that those records are a familiar sound. I know exactly what’s coming next, like a movie watched dozen of times on cable TV during your summer vacation. But in all this familiarity, I’ve discovered some bands I had no clue on that I feel like a downright dumb fugg for never knowing about then. How did I live without knowing about The Pale Saints for instance? A saddening embarrassment washes over me at the thought.

So, a few months ago I was trolling through T.J. s’ blog when I saw him mention a duo outta Baltimore named Rosemary Krust who apparently self proclaimed themselves to be new school shoe gazers. ‘Hmm…sounds interesting’ I said to myself as ‘Celia’s Dream’ unfurled itself outta the laptop. I quickly (and virtually) sent some scratch out to the land of Omar and waited to see how shiny these Krusts’ shoes were. When I got the package of gear a few weeks later, I was more than happy with what I got, but not for the reasons you might think. This was not the bump-free ride of cloud discovery I was expecting. If these guys are gazing at anything, it seems it would be out of a grimy attic window down to a desolate beach where a lone skin bather reads ‘The Insulted and Humiliated’, walks in circles from time to time and counts the crashing waves. Unlike most of the four track brigade clogging the underground these days who use their lack of prowess and recording funds as a crutch rather than a place to explore, Rosemary Krust seem to create their own world out of their limitations, which is what it’s all about in the first place…right? The CD-R that documents their first two weeks of playing together, titled (surprise, surprise) ‘The First Two Weeks of Rosemary Krust’ is abit more noisy and baleful than some of these later recordings. It sounds like Katherine Plummer and William Hardy (the two that make up R.K.) are both discovering and destroying their equipment to make that dusty carpet appear to be ridden into oblivion. A cloudy take on Teenage Jesus and the Jerks’ ‘Orphans’ is thrown in to prove the point of shrouded nihilism on the bands’ part and ‘The First Two Weeks..’ is over.

The seven inch which I believe they self-released sometime last summer, tells a great story of which I’m still trying to figure out the ending. Most of the tracks are such short snippets of slow mo-ed fragile thought; it’s hard to get a grasp on them before they drift off into the ether, which brings you back to try and catch ‘em again and again. The definite ‘lead’ track off the disc is ‘Blank Stare’. Stripped of the effects-laden cocoon it inhabited on the ‘First Two Weeks…’ CD-R, the track is a bare boned declaration adorned with perfectly simple hooks and vox. Is it cool to
mention some parts remind me of The Swirlies? Are The Swirlies cool to mention?

And then a few weeks ago, I received a new full length CD-R in the mail from these two entitled ‘Slow Light’ which was released on the Spleen Coffin label. I was in the middle of a pain in the ass move out of my apartment, so I put in it a box somewhere and remembered to remind myself to listen to it when I wasn’t so bogged down with boxes of records and feelings of rage towards bug eyed pillow case wearers. So a few days after a grueling session of carting some twenty-one boxes of records up a combined total of three flights of steps, I felt I was ready for ‘Slow Light’. As expected, it was just the sorta soothing and disorienting balm I needed after such laborious tedium. Loops of tapes and tapes of loops have seemed to work themselves into the duo’s repertoire and make me feel submerged in a sea of sound not unlike a gnat in vinegar. Interspersed between all the abstractions are potent, simple tunes that might seem abit dreary and limey damaged…BUT SO WHAT? I’m a dreary fuck and I love limeys. Mitchell and Webb…Richard Treece…Peter Cook…Garry Bushell…name me a limey I don’t love and I’ll show you my stunned face. To think this thing will fall into obscurity due to it’s miniscule run (an edition of 45?) is sort of a bummer, but maybe (just maybe) that means it won’t fall into the hands of some ding dong with an agenda and it’ll just exist as is. Quite a concept.

All these discs come wrapped up in hand done covers and the whole bit and the look and feel of ‘em will hopefully give you (read – me) hope in sonic humanity in this day and age of dickless ding dongs that I don’t even know nor care for anymore.

http://www.myspace.com/rosemarykrust

Oh yeah, you probably already heard about this, but just in case…check out the itinerary for Byron’s ‘No More Bush’ tour. Looks like it could be enough of a good time to lock up the bobcat in the barn and come on out. The Philly show will hopefully behold the debut reading appearance of Tom Lax. Inside sources say the guy is trying to wrangle out of it, but I think if all you die-hard Siltbreeze fans send in those postcards and photos of yourself wearing your homemade Pink Reason ponchos, he’ll just HAFTA do it.

NO MORE BUSH TOUR DATES

FRI AUG 1, 7:00 PM sharp
Artifacts 21st Century, 28 North Maple Street. Florence MA 413-320-9480

Zaika/Jack Rose/Valerie Webber/50 Foot Women + Axolotl/Byron Coley/Matt Krefting/Dredd Foole/Thurston Moore

SUN AUG 3, 7:00 PM sharp
UAG Gallery, 247 Lark Street, Albany NY 518-426-3501

Zaika/Jack Rose/Valerie Webber/50 Foot Women + Axolotl/Charles Plymell/Kate Village + John Morton/Wovoka/Byron Coley + Ziamaluch

MON AUG 4, 8:00 PM sharp
PA’s Lounge, 345 Somerville Ave. Somerville MA617-776-1557

Jack Rose/Valerie Webber/50 Foot Women + Axolotl/Byron Coley/Kate Village + Bill Nace/Sunburned Hand of the Man/Damon Krukowski/Bobb Trimble

TUES AUG 5, 8:00 PM sharp
Café Nine, 250 State Street New Haven CT 203-789-8281

Zaika + Paul Flaherty/Jack Rose/Valerie Webber/50 Foot Women + Axolotl/Byron Coley/Matt Krefting/Bill Nace + Jacqui Ham

THURSDAY AUG 7, doors open 9:00 PM
Velvet Lounge, 915 U Street NW, Washington DC 202-462-3213

Zaika/Jack Rose/Valerie Webber/50 Foot Women + Axolotl/Byron Coley/MV+EE+ special guest tba

FRIDAY AUG 8, 9:30 PM sharp
Tarantula Hill, 2118 West Pratt, Baltimore MD 410-945-7825

Charles Plymell/Zaika/Jack Rose/Valerie Webber/50 Foot Women + Axolotl/Byron Coley/Roxie Powell/MV+EE

SATURDAY AUG 9, doors open 7:30 PM
A secret location in Philadelphia 215-694-5861

Charles Plymell + Mike Watt/Zaimph/Tom Carter + Willie Lane/Jack Rose/Valerie Webber/50 Foot Women +Axolotl/Byron Coley/Tom Lax/MV+EE

MONDAY AUG11, 8:00 PM sharp
Knitting Factory, 74 Leonard Street, NYC 212-219-3132
Charles Plymell/Zaika + Loren Connors/Jack Rose/50 Foot Women + Axolotl/Valerie Webber/Byron Coley/Gary Panter/MV+EE

And until then…PHHTTT.

(Is all that enough to quailify to be mentioned on the Six Organs site again? I really hope so)

2008-05-16T09:26:00.000-07:00

2 YEAR OLD INTERVIEW WITH PETE ZELEWSKI OF NEGATIVE APPROACH AND THE ALLIED (DONE BY ME OF COURSE)
In celebration of watching the greatness of Mr. Brannon sporting bi-focals while hunched over the lyric booklet of ‘Total Recall’, I am ‘printing’ the full interview I did a few years back with Pete Zelewski, original bass player for Negative Approach and founder of The Allied, the early 80’s Detroit Hardcore band that time forgot but nerds didn’t. One day when I’ll be wearing diapers involuntarily (unlike now) their slim recorded output will make it out to the Punk Rock public. For those who are actually familiar with their mighty Oi! tainted roar, dig in and enjoy this in-depth Q&A. For those who ain’t, read on and imagine.

200LBU -- Give a brief description of how and where you grew up. If you didn’t grow up in the Midwest, where did you grow up and what lead you to this area? Do you think the environment you grew up in was one of the factors that got you interested in Punk.

Pete Zelewski --I grew up in a very middle class suburb of Detroit called Grosse Pointe. Life in Grosse Pointe was probably like a million other soulless suburbs throughout America, which was the perfect breeding ground for me to engross myself in punk rock. I always felt like an outcast in High School and the local community and found that by submerging myself in music, art and writing I could just about survive the normality of the local life. Punk Rock not only gave me an outlet to vent my frustrations (through music, bands and fanzines) but also an identity that was unique to me at the time.

200LBU -- How did you first become aware of Punk Rock?

PZ -- I was into music long before I discovered punk rock mainly due to the influence of my older brother. There was always musicians hanging around my house and it was natural for me to follow in the same direction. Although my brother was more into traditional rock, musically I was always drawn to bands that were less on the mainstream side of things. One summer a cousin came to visit from London and for the first time I was exposed to all sorts of bands that were happening in the UK punk scene at the time (The Sex Pistols, The Jam, The Clash, The Ruts etc.). Although I used to read about punk in magazines like Creem, for one reason or another I never took them seriously. Out of curiosity I bought the Sex Pistols ‘Never Mind The Bollocks’ and from the moment the needle hit the turntable I was hooked. It was the calling I had been waiting for and from that point on there was no turning back. Within a week I cut and dyed my hair, ripped up my leather jacket, learned a few guitar chords and formed my first punk band called ‘the Sleeves’.

200LBU -- What were some of the first Punk records you got? What are some of your favorites out of the lot that inspired you to start bands, etc. What records prior to being aware of Punk do you think factored into you getting interested in Punk.

PZ -- The most liberating thing for me about Punk Rock was that anyone could do it (and anyone was welcome). One of the most influential albums for me before hardcore was ‘Rocket To Russia’ by the Ramones. As a struggling guitarist I managed to learn the entire album in a weekend while my older brother and his friends painfully spent weeks learning chord progressions to Pink Floyd’s ‘Dark Side of the Moon’. Since I had no set agenda musically I was very open-minded and would buy anything that looked interesting (The Jam, Eater, Sham 69, The Clash, The Buzzcocks etc.). What I loved most about punk rock at the time was that visually the records were often as exciting as the music on offer. I was very into art at school and found the imagery used in record sleeve design very stimulating. This inspired me not only musically but also the fanzine graphics and gig poster design I later was heavily involved in.

200LBU -- Describe what the Midwest music scene was like at the time before you guys started playing out. Name specific bands and clubs and what kind of ‘scene’ went on there and how you felt about it. What were the bands (prior to the HC explosion) in your area that you thought were doing something viable and inspired you to start playing music.

PZ -- Before the hardcore scene evolved there really was no scene to speak of in Detroit. Because of licensing laws (I was 16 at the time) it was almost impossible to see bands in the few clubs that had punk rock on offer. The punk scene at the time had more of a new wave slant and consisted of a few places like Bookies, Nunzios, The Red Carpet and a few irrelevant others. In the early days, myself and John Brannon (NA singer) would go to check out local Detroit bands like Coldcock, The Mutants, The Sillies who were all ‘supposedly’ punk rock. We found it very disheartening, and if anything, it made us more determined (by their lack of conviction) to start a band that was relevant to kids our age.

Through our never-ending search for good music we luckily befriended a girl called Larissa Stolarchuck who sang in a band called L7. L7 were a huge breath of fresh air for us and the only Detroit band we could take seriously at the time (not hardcore but very uncompromising in their approach). We took every opportunity to see them live and became real fans. Larissa also wrote a fanzine called ‘Anonymous’ which certainly inspired my fanzine writing later on. Larissa was a very interesting person and highly knowledgeable musically and responsible for introducing John and I to the Necros.

200LBU -- How did you find out about the west coast Punk stuff? Slash? Flipside? Where did you find those magazines in the Midwest? Did you do a lot of mail order? What record stores out there stocked this stuff?

PZ -- It will come as no surprise that my musical influences in most cases laid on the other side of the Atlantic so at the time I wasn’t aware of Flipside or Slash. I used to travel about 50 miles to Ann Arbor (a small college town in Michigan) to buy the New Musical Express and Sounds just to read about British punk rock. If the NME wasn’t in stock I would pick up anything else that might look interesting and slowly I built up a huge collection of fanzines, which helped to further expand my musical knowledge with what was happening outside of the sterile confines of the Detroit music scene.

200LBU -- Did you skate? If so, how did you get into that and how did you find out about pro skaters like Alva, Adams, etc. How long were you skating for before you found out about Punk? How do you think skating and the HC scene worked together? Through HC, did you meet any of your skate heroes? If so, which ones? Any good stories?

PZ -- I always found it odd (and still do) between the connection of skateboarding and punk rock. Before my punk days I was heavily addicted to skateboarding and used to spend months on end at the local skate park. I was really into Tony Alva and all the Dogtown skaters and even got caught by the police one summer for spray painting ‘Dogtown Skates’ on a local shop wall. When I discovered punk rock, skateboarding just seemed so irrelevant and I immediately swapped my board for a guitar.

A few years later a friend who was still into skating told me I had to come back to the skate park because all the skate kids had cut their hair and were full into punk rock. Because finding local punks my age was the equivalent of discovering life on Mars I went straight over there in the hope of finding some like minded band mates. I was slightly disappointed with my discovery when I realized that most of the skate kids had very little interest in music (Devo was a favorite amongst them?) and were really just using punk rock as a way to emulate their skate heroes in California.

200LBU -- How did you get to know Tesco Vee? What was the first time you met him? What records/mags/cultural things did he turn you onto?

PZ -- Tesco was a great guy and hugely influential to the Midwest hardcore scene. We were introduced to Tesco shortly after we met the Necros. Touch and Go was the Midwest hardcore bible at the time and very well respected in the underground American music scene. Because of this status whenever Tesco wrote about a group it was instant publicity. He conducted the first ever Negative Approach interview (in a toilet) before we even played a gig and our popularity just seemed to grow overnight. If anything he made us feel like a band worth listening to and really gave us the confidence to push on. Tesco was never really a big fan of the Allied, but I always respected him because he gave us a fair hearing and wasn’t so quick to judge us like many others from that scene.

He was also highly knowledgeable musically (never limiting himself to just hardcore) and had a huge record collection (the only one to rival Barry Hensslers’), which as a record nut, I was in complete awe of. Through his fanzine Touch and Go we were exposed to all sorts of West Coast and Washington D.C. music that most of us would never have had the chance to read about.

200LBU -- How did you become aware of the slam dancing/stage diving ritual of Hardcore? Did you read about it? I know this sounds like a totally retarded question, but I’m just sorta curious of how you found out about it.

PZ -- The whole slam dancing thing was very a west coast thing and I was completely unaware of it until I first saw Black Flag (with Dez on vocals). The Necros were obviously well into it and the moment Black Flag hit the stage the floor exploded with slam dancers with elbows and fists flying in every direction. It was never really my thing but it certainly helped to make hardcore gigs a real spectacle.

200LBU -- When and how did you guys get to know the kids in the D.C. scene?

PZ -- The Washington D.C. connection happened through Barry, Todd and Corey from the Necros. They were well into the whole D.C. scene long before us and exposed us to all the great music that was coming out of the area. We first met the D.C. kids when Minor Threat played a gig to about 30 kids in a bar in Windsor, Canada called the Coronation Tavern. Seeing Minor Threat live for the first time was an experience I’ll never forget and certainly in my top 10 gigs of all time. At the time John Brannon and I just formed Negative Approach and we quickly realized that if we were going to be taken seriously as a hardcore band in their league we had some serious work to do.

200LBU -- What do you remember about the following bands --

Harold:
PZ --A joke-ish band fronted by a guy called Davo (I think). If my memory serves me correct Harold used various members of Youth patrol as a backing band. Never my sort of thing but always very humorous. Frontman Davo took some great photos from the early Freezer days some of which I used in my fanzine, the Real Threat.

200LBU -- Youth Patrol

PZ --Youth Patrol were one of the earliest hardcore bands along with the Necros and Negative Approach. I have vague memories of myself playing guitar for them in the early days but left after forming Negative Approach. OP and Graham who later joined NA were both members of Youth Patrol. Their singer (Spike) also played bass in the first line-up of the Allied. For one reason or another no one ever took Youth Patrol as serious as they did Negative Approach (they were a few years younger) but they weren’t a bad band considering they were all about 14.

200LBU --Bored Youth

PZ --Easily the most underrated band from the Detroit hardcore scene. They weren’t technically a thrash/hardcore band but they had a real style of their own and hugely influenced me when I put the Allied together. Musically their songs were slower than the bands at the time and they definitely had an English influence to their sound mainly due to singer Rob and drummer Fred being huge Eater and Sham 69 fans. Having said that lyrically they were in a league of their own and sang songs, which really hit home about what life was like being a teenage punk in Detroit (check out their song ‘Outcast’). Their singer Rob Michaels was a good friend and a great guy. He sang for the Allied for a short time when Bored Youth broke up but left the band to attend college.

200LBU -- English Oi! Music played a big part in the early Midwest scene. How did you become aware of these bands? What was your interpitation of these bands? Did you find the idea of English music to be exotic? How much of the English skinhead ideals come into play into play in the Midwest scene?

PZ -- It’s hard to deny the fact that the English Oi bands had a big influence not only on the Allied but also on quite a few of the hardcore bands. I was an avid reader of UK magazines like NME and Sounds so even before my introduction to hardcore I was used to reading about bands like Sham 69, the Cockney Rejects and Blitz. Although the similarities between the Oi bands and the US hardcore bands are few, the common link, which really brought them together, was the whole chanting thing with everybody in the crowd singing along. The Necros used to cover Sham 69’s ‘Rip Off’ and it would always get the whole crowd singing/chanting along which also started having the same effect on their other songs. I never limited myself to just buying music from the US, so although bands like Minor Threat and the Necros were a big influence, I was also checking out all the new Oi bands from the UK. I remember sitting down with John Brannon after hearing the first Blitz single and we were completely blown away by it. We then bought the first Oi album and immediately fell in love with the 4-Skins and even covered ‘Chaos’. Although Negative Approach weren’t an Oi band we were without a doubt heavily influenced by it.

To be honest I think we were all too young and naive to really understand the political agenda of a lot of those English Oi bands. For me it was just great, raw explosive music and although I was aware of some of the extremist views of a lot of the bands (SKrewdriver being one) I tried my best to ignore it. Although I considered the Allied a punk band first and foremost we unfortunately started attracting a following that were hugely into the Oi/skinhead thing. In a naive way they took the skinhead thing far too serious and the level of violence at our gigs was really starting to escalate. It made no sense to me how Sham 69 used to sing ‘If the Kids Are United’ and here were a bunch of skinheads beating everyone up around them. I hated all the violence that surrounded the scene and without a doubt it was one of the main thing that made me turn my back on it.

200LBU -- Tell me how Negative Approach formed

PZ -- John Brannon and I lived in Grosse Pointe just streets from each other and went to the same high school. We were both the only punks in Grosse Pointe (and complete outcasts) at the time and struck up a relationship instantly. At the time I was playing bass in my band called the Sleeves and John was in a band called Static. Static were very glam punk in the vein of the New York Dolls and the Stooges and I was doing my best to be Paul Weller with my band the Sleeves. Although musically we’re on opposite sides of the fence it was inevitable that we would end up in a band at some stage just because there was no one else around like us at the time. We started hanging out and going to gigs more frequently and eventually, through meeting the Necros, discovered hardcore.

From that initial meeting with the Necros (and seeing Black Flag live) we both knew instantly we wanted to form a hardcore band. John had put a lot of work into Static and was hesitant to leave but listened to my advice and followed me in our first musical venture by forming Negative Approach. We recruited a local skater Rob McCulloch on guitar, who I had met through some skate kids and we brought along an odd Iranian drummer named ‘Zuheir’ to keep the beat. Before we knew it we had a band name, six songs and we started spray painting ‘NA’ all over Detroit!

200LBU -- What were the first NA shows like? What was the reaction?

PZ -- It’s got to be said that John Brannon as a front man was really the star of that scene. He was the sort of guy who was always meant to be on stage and came alive because of it. In our early bands (Static and the Sleeves) we probably never played to more than 20 people but as soon as NA was formed we instantly started attracting a huge die-hard following. John thrived on this and all the crowd participation/chanting and really transformed himself into an amazing front man.

The early gigs were explosive and with each one we played there would be another 30 or so kids in tow with NA stencilled on their shirt or jacket. We never expected to be in the same league as the Necros or Minor Threat but the support we were getting was very strong and so instant we literally moved into the hardcore premiership overnight. What started out as a cool name written on a wall was now a band that was turning into a real force in the Midwest hardcore scene.

200LBU -- How long were you in NA?

PZ --Probably about a year. John and I were still great friends but musically we were really drifting. Although I loved the impact we were having in the scene I was concerned there was no room to develop musically. I was getting really bored with the 30-second songs and full on thrash approach. At the same time I started getting into the Effiges from Chicago and Iron Cross from Washington D.C. who seemed more in tune with where I was coming from musically. Since the scene was really now starting to take off I also felt it was a great time to produce my first fanzine (Real Threat). Although I always loved playing music my first love was art/photography/journalism and I just saw this as a great chance to get my fanzine started (something I had always wanted to do). It felt like a good time as any to leave the band and I called it a day. John was disappointed but cool about it and immediately they had more like-minded band members in the shape of the OP and Graham from Youth Patrol. Although I was proud of forming NA and steering John in the right direction the new band members really turned them into what people know them for today.

200LBU -- When did you decide to form The Allied? What was the reason behind it?

PZ -- I felt very stifled by the music I was playing in Negative Approach (hence my departure) and after I got my fanzine (the Real Threat) going I felt the urge to start playing music again. Although the music scene in the Midwest was traditionally very diverse, the new bands starting up seemed to lack any really originality and this inspired me to form a band that didn’t follow the hardcore/thrash rule book. Influenced by bands like Iron Cross in Washington and The Effigies in Chicago I had a clear idea what I wanted to do with the Allied and enlisted Doug Bashaw on vocals who also shared my views. I loved the energy of hardcore but I wanted to slow the pace down and in a way offer an alternative to what my peers were doing. Although we had a healthy following I was always surprised by the negative reaction to the band just because we were trying something different.

200LBU -- The Allied seemed a bit more into Brit punk than the other Midwest bands. I mean, NA covered Oi! bands and stuff, but you guys seem to have this legend around you that you were more Brit influenced than the others. Was this a conscious decision?

PZ -- You can’t ignore your influences, and for better or worse, my musical influences were always rooted deep in British music. From the Stones and the Beatles, to the Clash and the Jam to my current favourite bands like the Arctic Monkeys and the Kaiser Chiefs my musical tastes have always predominantly resided in the UK. Naturally when I put NA and the Allied together my musical influences came across in our sound. Having said that it was never a conscious effort to sound British, and lyrically we sang about the same issues most teenage punks sang about and not about being on the dole and drinking in pubs (we were all straight edge anyway).
It always amazed me how the British influenced tag went against us. We were constantly being accused of not supporting local bands, which couldn’t have been further from the truth. It was precisely because of local bands like the Necros that I had the confidence to put a band together that reflected my true musical tastes.

200LBU -- What were some of the most memorable NA and Allied shows?

PZ -- For me it had to be the Freezer Theatre gigs. I spent years going to punk shows in Detroit and the attitude towards anyone under 18 was always so negative it was so refreshing to have the Freezer, which was a place where we made the rules. When hardcore bands used to play, there was sometimes as many as 6-7 bands on the bill. You would be in the crowd one minute and the next you were on the stage. To me this was what punk rock was all about.

200LBU -- In the American Hardcore book, author Steven Blush makes some accusations that The Allied wanted to be the American version of Skrewdriver. This isn't true, is it?

PZ -- This was really disturbing when I first heard his comment. I have never met Steven Blush but he obviously knows very little about the Allied or me to come out with nonsense like that. To publish such a strong statement without even bothering to contact me (or any of the other band members) in the first place is just irresponsible journalism.

For the record, The Allied had no political agenda and, at the end of the day we just four middle class suburban kids playing punk rock. Obviously printing the truth about us wouldn’t have been exciting enough to help shift copies of his very inaccurate book.

200LBU -- Why did the Allied break up?

PZ -- I left the band in late ‘83, which really resulted in my complete exit from that scene. I was involved in the scene from day one and my life was completely absorbed in everything to do with it for 3 years. Although the early days were fantastic (when we were all united) the scene was really starting to divide as things progressed. The hardcore bands were becoming more and more like heavy metal bands (I detested heavy metal) and the violence that was surrounding the scene was really getting out of control. I just took a step back one day and realized I had very little in common with most of the kids involved. Punk rock to me was always very liberating but I found the close-mindedness of a lot of those kids very difficult to stomach.

Regarding my departure from the Allied, I spoke about it with Allied singer Doug Bashaw at length, and although disappointed, he completely understood my reasons for leaving. There were no hard feelings; it was just that I needed to move on. Coincidentally, I only found out recently that they continued as a five piece for another three years (with members of the Displaced) after I left the band.

200LBU -- When was the 1st NA show?

PZ -- The first Negative Approach show was at a party in the basement of Todd Swalla (Necros drummer) in Maumee, Ohio. We had only been together a few months and were completely un-rehearsed but it was an amazing gig. Both John and myself had been in bands before and were used to having NO audience participation (except people throwing things at us) but this gig was completely different. All the Necros and their friends got right behind us with their support which really helped to calm our nerves (we were very nervous). It was that kind of support that really helped to install confidence in us as a band.

200LBU -- Talk about your fanzine Real Threat and what inspired you to do it. How many issues did you do? What were some memorable reviews or interviews that were in there?

PZ -- Although I was always in bands in one form or another I never wanted to pursue music long term as my real passion was always art and design (I’m a graphic designer today). Playing music was always secondary to me so getting the Real Threat off the ground was a big ambition of mine. My inspiration came from all sorts of UK fanzines like 48 Thrills, Sniffing Glue and Ripped and Torn, which were sent over from a cousin of mine in London. These fanzines to me really represented the DIY ethics of punk rock. After the hardcore scene started taking off I started getting into local fanzines like Anonymous, Touch and Go and most importantly the Smegma Journal which Barry Henssler used to publish. Barry taught me the art of photocopying, letrasetting (a primitive form of desk top publishing) and exposed me to a whole range of US/west coast fanzines, which I was completely unfamiliar with. The Midwest scene needed another fanzine to document what was happening and I also saw it as a great opportunity to write about bands a lot of the local kids would never have been exposed to.

I loved the whole fanzine process and was amazed at the reaction I used to get from kids all over the world. To this day I still have the original letters from all sorts of Real Threat readers including Thurston Moore, J Mascis, GG Allin and Mensi from the Angelic Upstarts.

Because producing a fanzine in 1981 was very time consuming (no Apple Macs, no internet, no email etc) I only ever published two copies of the fanzine. The third issue was just about finished (with an enlightening interview with Ian Mackaye) when I left the Allied, which also shut the doors on the Real Threat.

200LBU -- What was the Midwest’s problem with T.S.O.L.?

PZ -- Henry Rollins and the whole Black Flag crew had a big impact on hardcore, and when he left SOA to join Black Flag, a whole new macho attitude seemed to creep into the scene. There were stories of Rollins doing push ups and pumping iron before Black Flag shows and a lot of kids from our scene also adopted this macho stance (myself excluded). TSOL were notorious for wearing face makeup and this was something no self-respecting hardcore band was supposed to do. For everything great about the hardcore scene it was backward attitudes like this that really showed how narrow-minded some of the thinking was. I always found it slightly ironic how a band like the Misfits (who funnily enough also wore face make-up) were completely idolised in our circles whereas TSOL were despised. I personally never liked TSOL, not because they wore make-up (that I didn’t have problem with) I just thought they were a dreadful band.

200LBU -- How did you guys stumble upon the Freezer theatre? Describe the place as vividly as possible. Who was the initial person who found it? Who was the main person who booked it? When did it start having shows? How long did it last? What were the most memorable shows from there? Describe the space the best you can.

PZ -- I actually played at the Freezer a year before the hardcore gigs started. I wouldn’t say I discovered it but I certainly played a part in getting hardcore bands to play there. When I was playing bass in my first band the Sleeves we found it impossible to get gigs locally because of our ages (we were only 15/16). One night I attended a Rock Against Racism gig at Wayne State University and hooked up with a promoter who also ran the Freezer and I talked him into letting my band the Sleeves play at their next show. Because Rock Against Racism was big with punk bands in England (and I was wearing a Brigade Rosse t-shirt – to look like Joe Strummer) the promoter put us on the bill without even hearing us. We played our first gig at the Freezer with all sorts of Reggae, Soul and Calypso bands. We used to cover (very poorly) Junior Murvin’s ‘Police and Thieves’ and also the Slickers ‘Johnny Too Bad’ and that was enough to get us several more gigs at the Freezer with the RAR crowd. I also helped John Brannon’s first band Static get a gig there but the politically correct audience didn’t take to John rolling around the stage on broken beer bottles and smothering himself in toothpaste (Static had a song called ‘Toothpaste and Pills’)

Once we met up with the Necros we told them about the Freezer and Corey (being the shrewd business man that he was) made a few calls and the next thing we knew there was a gig with about 7 hardcore bands on the bill.

The Freezer itself was nothing more than a deserted shop front stuck in the middle of the Detroit’s Cass Corridor (very dangerous and run down area of Detroit). The club itself would hold about 150 people and was without a doubt the home to Midwest Hardcore. We graffited the walls, built the stage and turned it into a place of our own. My most memorable gigs from that time were at the Freezer (especially supporting Minor Threat the night it was closed down) just because it felt like home to most of us.

200LBU -- What was the first show you guys went to see out of the Midwest area (NYC, etc.) What did you think of it? How was it different from what was going on in the Midwest?

PZ -- Washington D.C was the first place that I played outside of Michigan (besides Ohio) and their scene was very different from ours. Because they were really the originators of hardcore there was almost some snobbery to how they treated us. I wouldn’t say they were rude (quite the opposite) but we were always made to feel like predators on the wrong turf.

Chicago was quite the opposite and a scene I felt far much more comfortable with. We befriended the Effigies and their manager John Banham soon after I formed the Allied and they really took us under their wings. They supported us when most people from our own scene turned their backs on us. We were huge Effigies fans (my main inspiration for forming the Allied) so to play with them and some of the other great Chicago bands like Naked Raygun and Six Feet Under was a real honour. I still consider the Effigies to be the best band from that era and although I listen to very little hardcore today those Effigies records just have a timeless feel to their sound that proves what a fantastic band they really were.

200LBU --How did you feel once you left the Midwest and found out people knew who you were and knew your songs? Were you surprised?

PZ -- Completely surprised! Funnily enough it still happens to this day. The biggest shock came a few years ago when I was at a White Stripes gig in London and I met up with Ben Blackwell from Detroit’s Dirtbombs. He told me their guitarist (and most of the band) were big Negative Approach fans and they even did a Negative Approach cover at their soundcheck! It was just hard to believe that a band I helped form over twenty years ago still had some relevance today. At the time we thought the band would last about the duration of one of our songs (30 seconds) but somehow we’re still talked about today.

200LBU -- What kind of impact do you think the Midwest scene made on the HC scene back then? What kind of impact do you think it made on culture in general?

PZ -- If you talk about American hardcore you can’t deny the influence and impact the Midwest had on it. Each scene in the US was very different but I do think the bands from the Midwest certainly had a uniqueness that wasn’t displayed in some of the other smaller scenes throughout the country. With bands like the Necros, Negative Approach, L7, Violent Apathy, The Meatmen and the Allied they all had something different about them while still retaining loyalty to each other and the scene around them.

Although I didn’t agree with all the attitudes that surrounded the Midwest Scene (which were quite sexist and very homophobic at times) at the end of the day it gave many kids the opportunity to look outside the small insular communities they came from and to help them develop ideas of their own to branch out and move forward. To me that’s what punk was really all about.

200LBU -- How do you feel about the legacy the Midwest scene has left? What do you think it was about the Midwest scene that left such an impact? Do you even consider it a legacy?

PZ -- I’d say a legacy is a bit of strong word to describe what we left but if we had some impact, and influenced others to do something equally creative, then that can’t be a bad thing. My only concern is that I feel kids today should be looking forward not backwards musically and concentrating on developing a scene or musical style that is unique to them (like we tried to do). Punk to me was all about youth and change and progression and it would be great to see another movement which is as exciting as what was happening with punk/hardcore in the early 80’s.

200LBU – Will any of the recorded output of the Allied ever see the light of day?

PZ -- It was unfortunate that the Allied never released any material in our day. Our John Kezdy produced ep on Ruthless Records never saw the light of day mainly because I left the band shortly after the recording. I’m not one to get caught up in anything nostalgic (certainly never a reunion) but it would be good to release those tapes just so people can make their own minds up about the Allied. A lot was said about the Allied (some good, plenty bad) and I’d prefer to let the music do the talking so that people can make their own minds up about the band.
It has taken me over two years to compile all the early recordings (and live DVD footage) including the John Kezdy produced Chicago sessions and it’s only a matter of time before we release something. We’ve had a few record labels approach us and we’re just deciding the best way forward to get a comprehensive package out there to as many people as possible.

200LBU -- What have you been up to since you left the Allied?

PZ -- During my time in Negative Approach and the Allied I never saw playing music as being a long term thing for me. Although it was fun at the time it was always really just a stop gap for me before I left Detroit and embarked on my real creative passion which is art and design. Once I left the Allied, I concentrated on getting out of the Midwest and eventually moved to Europe and settled in London (where I still live today). I studied design and I now work as a graphic designer in both print and web, which is now the main focus in my life, which doesn’t leave time for much else. I do still play guitar although these days it’s more likely I’ll be playing jazz and blues standards as opposed to anything by Negative Approach. I have been in several bands since my punk days (and done some solo acoustic work too) but right now I’m more interested in building up my vintage guitar collection than I am in playing guitar on stage again.

2008-05-07T11:16:00.000-07:00

AMERICA'S HARDCORE INTERVIEW ON THE DOUBLE CROSS SITE (DONE BY ME OF COURSE) If you told me when I was sixteen I would interview Kurt Loder when I got older, not only would I have not given a shit, I wouldn't believe you. If you told me when I was sixteen I would eventually interview Danny Slam, the vocalist for America's Hardcore, not only would I have shat my britches, I wouldn't believe you (I sense a theme here)

For those who are not Hardcore nerdboys, lemme tell ya that AHC are certainly the most underrated/unknown band to emerge from the early 80's SoCal Hardcore scene. They were an interesting band as they seem to be one of the first (if not THEE first) SoCal 'Core units who were dipping more into the well of the Midwest and D.C. sound rather than apeing anything from their own area....you know...the area that more or less 'invented' the whole shabang. They managed to chuck a few songs here and there on a few Mystic compilations and even got to make shirts that members of Minor Threat eventually put on their backs when they got back from tour (Check the back cover of the 'Salad Days' 45) The summer my brother started taking me to Hardcore shows, it seemed every band I saw had AHC stickers plastered on their gear. I distinctly remember Die Kruezen having one on their boombox. They were always one of those bands I wanted to know more about.

Well, fast forward to nowsville and lo and behold, I'm interviewing Danny Slam of AHC for the beyond excellent Double Cross site done by my old buddy Tim McMahon and his faithfull sidekick, Gordo. It's up there right now and the link to the site is right over there on the right with all the other links. If there's any difficulty in finding it, please call the nurse so's she can snuff you right now once and for all.

2008-04-16T10:41:00.000-07:00

IF YOU HEAR/SEE SOME DOUCHE NAMEDROP 'MANIAX' IN A MONTH OR SO...YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO BLAME/SHOOT ME... In the annals of Punk Rock history, there are bands upon bands who are the Hardcore equivilent of 'one hit wonders'; bands from outta nowhere who had that one cut on that one compilation that set both your body and imagination on fire. Even though the sound of that one song was great in itself, the nerd in you had to ask (to no one else but yourself of course) 'What else did they have up their sleeve?'My personal Hardcore annal (guh whuh?) heaves with such names as Hostile Youth, Shit S.A, Double Cross, B.I.U, The Conservatives, Crankshaft and (of course) Demented Youth. On the tipity top of that teetering list is Fresno Californias' Maniax who supplied us with the beyond classic anthem 'Off To War' on the beyond classic 'Not So Quiet On The Western Front' double LP compilation in 1982. For nigh on twenty five years now, this track has intrigued the fuck outta me. Althought the sentiment of the song fit the time and place it was plunging from, the sound was a broadcast entirely of its' own. With the buzzsaw guitar dipping in and out of the 'mix' while a barely pubescent vocalist drones on and on recieting the words 'Off To War' over and over again, this wasn't your average young kid thrash-o-thon for sure. I always wondered if their other songs were this disorienting and wonderful. Well, I need not wonder no more! Maniax vocalist Gregg Mitchell has finally found the time to share with us the 'lost tapes' of Fresnos' youngest early 80's Punk band and it's every thing I've dreamed it would be and more. 34 tracks of bedroom recorded early teenaged Punk Rock anthems about dead dogs, posers and having a crush on Wendy O. Williams. Are they using an air organ on track 29? What the fuck? THE MOST ESSENTIAL AND NEEDED POSTHUMOUS PUNK ROCK RELEASE OF OUR CENTURY AND I MEAN THAT. Even though I really hate how nothing of the past is left to the imagination anymore these days, I gotta say my brain is exhausted after twenty something years of wondering what those other Maniax tracks sounded like. Thanks for the rest, Gregg.

I know for a fact that raw foods enthusiast Chris Freeman has a few copies of this Maniax CD rotting away at the Fusetron compound. Bug him to sell you one. He's over there to the right in the linkage department.

And right now I'd like to say the only dude writing about music right now that I trust and respect is Chris Corry. Some of you might know CC as a member of Mind Eraser or F.Y.A. Some of you might know him as the mind behind the excellent bid hardcore blogsite. Me? I just know him as the only dude right now who sets my mind rotating with his insights into Hardcore and Punk (Kinda like Country + Western) He sometimes worries me at how much he cares and disects things on two levels. On the first, I worry he might just be spending too much time losing himself in his own world of cataloging numbers, matrixes and demo tapes. Don't become one of those guys! On the other, he's got me sitting here wondering if I missed something along the way as far as all the demos and seven inches I considered 'secondary' in my days of Hard 'Yore'. 'Did I miss something as far as True Colors or Fit of Anger goes?' I ask myself sometimes after waking in a cold sweat. Unlike the recent crop of kids who wanna write about Punk Rock from some sorta self-made thrown where they suck all the fun outta the situation with their text paper like analysis of the illegibilty of politics in Punk Rock or whatever drywit fuck concept they shat out this week, Chris keeps it down to the magic sounds and how they zapped his brain. When he does analize the situation, he does it with humour and insight. Dig on the boys' review of the Hellhammer boxset at the Shit-Fi site and lemme (and he) know what you think. Here's an unfancy link to the piece --

http://www.shit-fi.com/Reviews/Hellhammer/Hellhammer.htm

Linkage to Chris' normal blog over there to the right with the Fusetron link you should use to buy the Maniax CD mentioned up there. Dig on it!

Until next time, buy whatever records the other blog dudes tell you to buy and keep up with the scene and wake up in a year to the same thing...only slighty different. The whole process will kill time before you eventually die. In the words of co-worker and resident insane Jamacian Daniel Smith 'Wudda life!'

2008-03-26T08:53:00.000-07:00

ROCK WRITING IS OVER! (IF YOU WANT IT TO BE) 'Music columnists are imbeciles waiting for some of you screwballs to just fuckin' end it by slamming a lamp over their thick skulls crushing their craniums once and for all. The few who would actually be worthy columnists are too clever to ever actually take part in the charade.' -- Uncle Jim

The above quote from the 'Uncle Jim' persona of whatever Bishop brother maintains that side name/project were the truest words about the mastabatory cul-de-sac known as 'music journalism' I had ever read in my time of cookie eating. Trouble is he had it printed it in a publication that's the very fucking example of what he's writing about. The second issue of this Bixobal magazine gives late 90's mags like Halana and Opprubium a run for their money with it's humourless, friend wrangling pointlessness. Review upon unchalleging review of Wire approved improv pooh dominates the bulk of this rag while Richard Bishop (how many 'cred' points is that guy worth to the editors?) rattles on again about traveling around in India. When this guy starts keeping journals on being kidnapped and forced to work in a sweatshop in one of the countries he loves so much, maybe I'll be interested. You know what would be real interesting? Reading a diary Richard kept on AN ACTUAL JOB he's held down in his life. Aside from a rather touching and informative obit about Charlie Nothing done up by Keith from No Neck, this thing comes off like a mid-afternoon wank session with sandpaper in your palm. I see from the inside cover these guys have started a record label as well that serves up 'limited edition' records by all their improvising/noodling/cacophonous contributors. Boy, do you guys know how to make friends! Shit rags like this are the very reason I bide my time these days listening to the same five records over and over and never leaving the house. Are the editors of this mag 'here' for the music? Or do they publish this thing just to rub proverbial elbows with guys who should be (at least) supermarker managers at this point in their life. My brain barely agitates to come to a conclusion on that one. Now where are my back issues of Not For The Weak?

2008-03-12T08:55:00.000-07:00

200LBU'S SOUTH BY SOUTHWEST SHOWCASE!!! (LAST MINUTE) Sorry for the late notice, but I just thought I'd let you all know we have managed to throw down with a last minute showcase at that cavalcade of lost souls and sleaze merchants going on this week in Texas known as South By Southwest. Like all good blog nerds, we here at 200LBU have thrown countless artists to the wayside once more than fifty people had finally heard of them. They are all meaningless fodder to us as we tell everyone how great their new limited to five three inch CDR sounds while secretly listening to Everything But The Girl 'Best Of' CDR's burned and compiled by our nieces. Luckily, we have secured a venue in haphazard fashion down there in the land of Marching Plague and the Bang Gang to showcase our new crop of here-today-gone-tomorrow favorites. All the following bands will be performing this Saturday at The Chain Drive at 504 Willow Street in Austin at 2 a.m. Be there or be considered not relevent! The line-up is as follows --

STUBRETTH -- The hottest hipster Black Metal group going on today. They have never actually played an authentic Black Metal show nor actually gone to a Black Metal concert as a spectator, but that's not the point! The point is they have more CDR's of Greek Black Metal bands than you do! Who cares if they don't even own a copy of 'Sin After Sin' ? Their new CDR entitled 'From The Loins of Falsities and Flossies' will be on sale at the show.

WARNING FART -- Blazing 'old school' thrash that sounds like a cross between PTL Klub and Stukas Over Bedrock. Rad! Remember -- The 50's are now the 80's and the future will be never! Release on No Way Records imminent.

GOOP "I" -- You want mystery? You want elusiveness? You want non-commitment? Than the one manned Goop "I" is for you! We felt intrigued when Goop annonymously sent us his debut CDR 'The Cold Breaking Wind Feels Like Hot Rain'. We felt even more intrigued when he sent us numerous annonymously written e-mails asking us what we thought of his CDR and then we were totally intrigued when he bought off the rest of our Jandek vinyl collection for a mere $5000. This guy is so sensitive and forlorn, he might not even make it to his in-store appearence before the gig! Poor, poor pitiful him.

CINDERBLOCK DONKEY PUNCH -- In the past few years, most hardcore Power Electronics fans have complained how their beloved noise had become diluted and weak, but luckily Herbert Jamittinn (A.K.A Cinderblock Donkey Punch) is here to rescue the genre from the clutches of these new jack perpetrators. Speaking from his mothers' basement (which he rarely leaves) he says, 'Domick Fernow and all of them have taken it all and made it all 'Tiger Beat'. Fuck that!'. Herbert will be bringing the noise to our South By Southwest showcase for all the loser misogynists who fell in love with this sound all so many years ago in their mothers' basement. His latest cassette releases 'Shit Slot', 'You Broke My Heart, So I Broke Your Hello Kitty Collection' and 'My Father Was Very Distant and That's Why I'm The Way I Am' will all be for sale at the show.

It's gonna be one helluva show. Hope to see you there!

ALSO -- I will be leading a panel discussion on Friday afternoon entitiled "LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME! -- The History of Assholes in Music'. Hope to see you there too...asshole.

2008-02-14T09:29:00.000-08:00

'...I AIN'T GAY OR NUTTIN...IT'S JUST I LIKE READIN' QUEER BOOKS IS ALL...' ‘They’d come into it because they thought ‘What’s got coloured hair?’ They were looking for things that were fashionable’. – Mark Perry
The Wire January 2000

It was a sad day in my young life when I came to the realization that the very foundation on which I staked my whole life was a teetering and stinky pile of horseshit. ‘Punk Rock’ (that is the 1976 definition of the words) when it really boiled down to it, was more or less some vehicle for some carrot topped halfwit to sell a box full of torn t-shirts to a bunch of rich kids from the London suburbs. I think the idea finally hit me halfway through the snooze fest that is ‘England’s Dreaming’, that oh-so-exciting pile of pages written by the rockinest Grandma in ole Blighty, Jon Savage. It certainly didn’t make what Punk inspired any less of itself, but it still saddened my tiny twenty year old head to think something as earnest and close to my heart as Minor Threat was drawn from something that was all about ‘Pose, pose, pose’. I pretty much settled on the fact that Punk’s initial spark rested on getting over on someone to make a buck. What a bummer.

That idea sat in my brain for awhile and bobbed around in my gray matter here and there, but it floated to the front again whilst reading ‘Berlin Bromley’, the Punk memoirs of Bertie ‘Berlin’ Marshall, the flaming side mouse to Siouxsie, Steve Severin and the rest of the Bromley contingent. If there’s one person that defines the consciously vacant poser of King’s Road fashion of ‘76/’77, it’s this guy. If you go by the quotes on the back of the book (‘…A remarkable record of a defining moment in musical history’) you’d think you’re getting the lowdown on Brit ’77 action in all its glory. Instead, you get breakdowns on what was worn the first time Berlin went to see the Sex Pistols. The actual music? You’re gonna hafta consult someone else on that, lovey. But fuck, I guess cheesecloth is the defining moment of this music. Here goes that bummer headache again…

‘It’s a lot better now than it used to be. When it started it was all the art college lot, now it’s working class kids. You’ve got the Upstarts, the Rejects and us, just kids playing for the kids. And you don’t have to buy a thirty quid pullover or hang around the King’s Road anymore.’ -- Peter Chinhead
Sounds 7/5/1980

If you strip this book of having to do with anything remotely about music, than I’d say it’s a naughty little read full of mindless decadence written in the style of someone who IS there just for a cheap thrill and maybe a quick butt load of splooey. Soon after ‘discovering’ Punk, Berlin left his safe home in Bromley and became a rent boy lying in beds and man-doing everyone from National Front skins to Fat British businessmen with flatulence fetishes. Even though he never touched her, he caught crabs from Nancy Spungen (wudda honor!) and cryptically reveals that Stevie Jones and Cookie might have been doing one another. A book crammed with posing, sulphate, man love and catty wordage, ‘Berline Bromley’ is a fun, quick read that’s sorta like eating a Turkey and Ice Cream hoagie or a night out on the town with Lady Boys; easily regrettable but too much fun to pass up.

2008-02-08T08:11:00.000-08:00

200LBU'S 'BAND TO LOOK OUT FOR IN 2008' Turkey Tips (pictured above) are a newly formed duo that are --

A) Groundbreaking
B) Mesmerizing
C) Wholly original
D) All of the above

They recently came to the attention of --

A) Dusted Magazine
B) A friend of Dusted Magazine
C) Someone from Dusted Magazine who was eavesdropping in on a conversation of someone from Pitchfork while he was sucking the privates of a contributor to Arthur Magazine for one-of-a-kind hippy hairtips
D) All of the above

Their debut LP will soon be released on --

A) Load
B) Troubleman Unlimited
C) What's Your Rupture?
D) All of the above

And it will be entitled --

A) 'Neck Zit Serenade'
B) 'Personable Man Servant'
C) 'Who Blew A Load In The Toad of Baskerville?'
D) All of the Above

They will be going on tour this Spring with--

A) Airel Pink
B) Blank Dogs
C) Robedoor
D) All of the above

Followed by a huge feature about the band in --

A) Arthur
B) Dusted Magazine
C) Pitchfork
D) All of the Above

Written by --

A) Doug Mosurock
B) Doug Mosurock
C) Doug Mosurock
D) All of the Above

They will be quoted as saying in the article --

A) 'Yeah, Thurston totally loves us'
B) 'We've been really into these movie soundtracks from Bologna that someone from Gang Gang Dance really turned us onto'
C) 'This hairstyle? Some guy from Arthur turned me onto it in exchange for some head'
D) All of the above

In a year from now, they will be bigger than --

A) Brightback Morning Light
B) Xiu Xiu
C) White Magic
D) All of those bands everyone loved a year or so ago who now can't get paid to urinate in public.

2008-02-06T09:25:00.000-08:00

MY FAVORITE DUDS
PART ONE (IN A HOPEFULLY CONTINUING SERIES)As I gaze upon my record collection, ravaged and raped by both age and thieves, I can’t help but notice how numb I feel. If ten years ago you would have told me a decent chunk of my vinyl would be floating somewhere in the nether regions of nowhere without a culprit in sight for the crime, I surely would of broken down in tears. Right at this very moment, I could care less. There seems to be no time in my day when I’m pottering around the apartment and stop and think ‘Damn! I really wish I could hear that Acting Trio record just one more time!’ Where as most of my big-ticket items were snatched, the ones that no one would be caught dead listening to stayed behind. Surprise, surprise…

And I’m thankful for that. For these dud records are the ones that I derive immense pleasure from; these are the ones no one would wanna come over and listen to. Guilty pleasures? I think not. I don’t believe in that sorta shit. You either dig it or you don’t, and if you don’t wanna hear it, stay offa the bus. Let’s say (…fer example…) I pulled out this fifth album done up by The Cockney Rejects titled ‘The Wild Ones’. Even people with no back-story on these louts would look at this thing and find it fishy. As some of you might know, these guys were the poster boys for the whole Oi! thing-a-muh-bob of the U.K. in the early 80’s. No matter what anyone might tell you, those first few singles by the Rejects still stand up, especially when you got an Afternoon Penis leading a room in the chorus of ‘Oi! Oi! Oi!’…lemme tell ya. But even before the Hardcore wagon would really pick up steam in the states, The Rejects were already trading boots and braces for leopard skin prints and B.C. Riches. Stories say The Rejects were fed up with being falsely associated with the right winged thugs rampant on the Oi! scene and decided their way out was jumping on the last crest of the New Wave of British Heavy Metal (NWOBHM for you winners out there) I recall peering endlessly at the cover of this record in the racks of my local malls’ ‘import’ section when it came out. I was all of ten or eleven years old, but I knew of The Rejects and their jams and being a junior Anglophile, I was intrigued as shit over the whole skinhead thing I was reading about in my older brothers’ copies of the NME. Where the covers of their past albums showed The Rejects clowning around and mooning the camera, this one had this real posh looking photo of the guys posing in front of London Bridge (that is London Bridge, right?) Two out of the four members had hair past their ears and the drummer (Keith Warrington, formerly of Angelic Upstarts) had this real foppish rock star stance going on with his hand of the back of his hip plus (PLUS!!!) he was wearing an American football jersey. What the fuck was that? I was confused even further when I flipped the cover over and saw still shots of the guitarist Mickey Geggus wearing leather gloves and a leather jacket with no shirt underneath. Their vocalist had changed his name from ‘Stinky Turner’ to ‘Jefferson Turner’. Guess he wanted to class himself up. Can’t really impress a heavy metal babe with a name like ‘Stinky’, can you?

For some stupid reason or another, I bought the fucking thing. I remember looking at the song titles on the back cover (‘Way of the Rocker’, ‘Rock ‘N’ Roll Dream’, ‘Victim of the Cheap Wine’) while walking up to the counter and thinking it must be crap, but I wanted to know for myself if it was crap or not. Well, let’s just say I really found out for myself how crappy it was. It was disappointment once the needle hit the record. . The opening lyric of the record was ‘I don’t worry/I don’t care/I get out of bed and I comb my hair!’ That pretty much did it for me. The second song had this horrid chorus where the whole band went ‘Doot doo doo/Doot di do/Do-do!’. To my puritan punker ears, it just sounded like lame Heavy Metal riffs while Stinky (oh…excuse me…Jefferson) did some horrid Bon Scott imitation. I believe it sat around collecting dust for a few years until it was traded in at some store in my teens.

About three years ago, I found the record again and bought it just to remind myself how crap it was. Yes, I am a glutton for punishment who can’t hold onto money…please help me. But this disc elicited a different reaction some thirteen years later. Time certainly didn’t make the actual record any better, but it did add some sort of unfathomable element of fascination to it. Having taken in enough NWOBHM records as well as a shitload of lousy ‘Crossover’ records in my teens, I could hear this record as a very strange and desperate cry for help. By the mid-eighties, there were enough Brit Punkers trying to go Metal that it was pretty common to see your heroes latest record adorned in a cover that looked like a Greenslade record. But this record was recorded in 1981; way before Discharge would write thirteen minute long opuses about heroin addiction and have H.R. heave bags of smelly garbage at them. The Rejects were in a sea by themselves going metal while The Exploited and Chron Gen ruled the U.K. charts. ‘The Wild Ones’ is as single minded in it’s pursuit of riffs and glory as any third tier underground British Heavy Metal record of it’s time, but the (dare I say?) charm of it lies in the fact that these guys ain’t too savvy on their instruments. The riffs are generic as hell, but they cut to the bone hard as the football Jersey sporting Warrington tries desperately to keep up. Producer Pete Way (of UFO) tries to mask all the unsightly holes in the sound with tons of reverb, but it’s a lost cause. And strangely, all the things I listed above are the reasons I pull this record out time and time again. As an artifact, it stands by itself in its timeframe. It would be four years down the road until anyone would have to suffer through the endless piles of shitty records Punks would make with dreams of zit faced No Cal longhairs moshing very clumsily in their heads. If anything, this is the record DYS wish they made in 1985 (and that’s saying a lot) From now ‘til the end of my time, it’ll be a fave to pull out to annoy, confuse and entertain the kids, which is the least I can say for (fill in this blank with whatever band is on your nerves this week)

Ta for now!

2008-01-31T11:21:00.000-08:00

EVERYBODY WANNA GO TO HEAVEN, BUT NO ONE WANNA DIE...
I'm not sure if anyone still looks here for anything, but I figured it would be the easiest way to let the free world know one of my all-time favorite films is finally somewhat available. When and if it'll get to DVD, who knows...for now, here is a link to it in the unfanciest way possible...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3KlvT2kUwQ&feature=PlayList&p=08E9CEFBBBE30908&index=0&playnext=1

My best of '07 should be up on Terminal Boredom some time soon and maybe a few other things spread out here or there. I'll let ya know...

2007-10-13T21:05:00.000-07:00

AUTUMN SOUNDS FOR THE PAINFULLY BONED (YOU CAN'T KEEP A GOOD JERK DOWN)

I wish I could tell ya I’m back and ready to strut through the doors of the local douche bag distillery with a cane in one hand and a tall boy of Steel Reserve in the next, but shit man, things will NEVER be that bad EVER AGAIN. While not running to this constantly dilapidating craptop to tell you about every hunk of vinyl people send me, I’ve been spending my time wisely…making extra money…shoving beer cans into chickens…watching the second season of ‘Twin Peaks’…shoving more beer cans into chickens (still don’t think I got it quite right)…working on my contribution to the ‘Anywhere, Anyhow’ book…and basically, chillin’…not paying attention to shit that don’t make me money and feeling better than I ever have in years. SO THERE…

I don’t really sit around and stew in my own filth and listen to records the way I used to. I think the only thing I listened to this week over and over again was Colin Blunstone’s ‘One Year’ and that’s about it and I’m pretty satisfied with it. New singles by obvious current favorites have been spinning every once in awhile. Government Warning’s ‘Arrested’ single manages to make the hair on the back of everything stand up listen after listen. Virginia Beach…O.C….what’s the diff? The title track is an anthem and a half. More pills for these kids toot sweet!!! Dry-Rot still makes me wonder with the latest ‘Subordinate’ 7” on Painkiller. A concept record of sorts on the subjects of submission and control with a filthy Void-core backdrop. I wonder what this band would do with a 12” canvas to spread their ideas on…Hmm…I wonder. I like that Uber single on the Professional Retard label too. Spanish duh-core never sounded so sweet. Pity that ODFX single went so quickly, but you didn’t deserve it any way…HA-CHA!!! That’s what you come here for, right? Abuse?

Oh yeah…I forgot…There were a few reasons I decided to swallow my pride and log on to this thing again. Firstly, for those who didn’t get a copy of the Swindle issue with my Detroit Hardcore piece in it, it’s available on line at their website. Here’s a non-fancy link to it –

http://swindlemagazine.com/issue12/detroit-hardcore/

Secondly, Olympia, Washington’s Sex/Vid will be rolling through the east coast and I am ACTUALLY GOING TO LEAVE THE HOUSE TO SEE THEM. Woah. They’re playing in Brooklyn at PassOut Records at 131 Grand Street in Williamsburg this Thursday (the 18th) sometime in the evening. The next day they’re playing in South Boston with Mind Eraser and then I think they’re off to Canada for the F’ed Up hoedown. Here’s unfancy link #2 to get you psyched up –

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SpFCQqi8VvY

And lastly, I will be playing records at the Destijl/Soft Abuse CMJ showcase this Thursday (the 18th) at the Cake Shop at 152 Ludlow between Stanton and Rivington on the Lower East Side of the Lower East Side Crew 7". Artists performing include Car Commercials, King Darves, Ed Askew and a host of others. Other DJ’s include Mike and Maya Bernstein (Heavy Tapes, Religious Knives, etc.) and Brian Turner (WFMU, ex- guitarist in Skinhead Youth) This shit will be FREE to the public and will start at 2PM. Plenty of time to check this out and boogie over to PassOut to check out Sex/Vid. Perfect…

O.K. That’s it…Back to YouTube for more ‘Peep Show’ and ‘Never Mind The Buzzcocks’.

2007-07-29T03:08:00.000-07:00

NO BLOGGIN' 'ROUND HERE FOR A LONG, LONG TIME...

200LBU will be going on hiatus for a spell, due to something called the real world. Also, to be honest, I'm sorta sick of being the middleman between young innocent types and hipster vampires. As I scramble to sell records on eBay and take bucket after bucket of change down to the CoinStar, me thinks I'm owed some 'finders' fee' by some large indepedent label types. If you're half the gents you say you are, you'll send a grand or so to me via PayPal. If not...well all I can say is thanks for all the horrible promo CD's no record store will buy. Getting to hear promising new talent like the Silver Daggers or another 'totally great' Wooden Wand CD is all worth it.

And here we go again...I mean, does anyone really wanna read this crap over and over again? My bitter bitching has become a literal chore, something to entertain you and keep my finger in your pie. Fuck it. I'm out. Go read one of the blogs mentioned to the right and remember to 'stay relelvent'.

2007-07-11T10:43:00.000-07:00

BEFORE SPEEDOS AND WEED, THERE WAS LICORICE PIZZA...

In those wide eyed, innocent days of pud pulling and record collecting, it was always a bright orange blast to find out there was some sorta artifact out there you'd never heard nor seen; a total holy grail (to put it in less wordy words) Back in said time, my pals and I always heard about some Black Flag 7" that wasn't available through the SST catolog and it was simply refered to as the 'Licorice Pizza' 7". The toddler trainspotter in me not only remembered seeing those two words at the bottom of alot of the Black Flag flyers my brothers' friend was sending him from L.A. (i.e. -- 'Tickets available from...') but I also recalled seeing some sign in the background of 'Fast Times At Ridgemont High' that had those words printed on it. What can I say? I was a nerd as soon as I stepped outta my mommas' gut. I later found out via a back issue of Flipside or something that Licorice Pizza was a chain store in Southern California and the singles were given away free (Uh...what?) at certain Licorice Pizza locations prior to the 'Damaged' record coming out. That was a total mindblower to me at my age. I remember thinking,'Man, I gotta get myself out to California...they have record stores there that just GIVE AWAY Black Flag records!' Later on in life, I found out the meaning of the word 'promotion' and realized this wasn't some act of punk graciousness, but simply a decent way thought up by Unicorn and SST to drum up interest in an upcoming lp. Nonetheless, I had no idea what was on this record or how to get it, which of course made me want it even more. A little further down the line, I heard somewhere that the majority of these singles were simply THROWN AWAY by the Licorice Pizza franchise when the promotional scheme didn't pan out as planned. I remember thinking 'Man, I gotta get myself out to California...they have record stores out there that just THROW AWAY Black Flag records!' Eventually, someone (TDT maybe?) got a hold of one through a trade with a penpal and to say I was dissapointed would be an understatement. The thing had no picture sleeve and it was just live recordings of 'Life of Pain' and 'Thirsty & Miserable'. Is this what I was waiting so long to behold? Ech... I promptly killed my persuit for the record and moved on to even lamer prospects...

But the other day I ran across a cheap bootleg of the thing and I thought 'What The Hell?' and I gotta say I'm pretty stoked on it in my time of dying. Perhaps it's that the cover has my fave Flag stillshot of all time (The one where Dez-O looks like he's either got a bad rasta cap or a poorly knitted Afro wig on his dome) Perhaps it's that the thing really looks like a labor of love, complete with liner notes, pics of the original record and a BF interview from an old issue of Ripper. Or it could be that these tracks simply shred (If I may use some sixth grade lingo here) The Ginn/Cadena assault is in full force here and although Hank sounds parched, his voice sounds burly as hell. Check the weirdo phrasing on 'Thirsty and Miserable'. At the end of the single, they even chuck on an unearthed studio recording of Dez singing 'Spray Paint (The Walls)' If you ask for more, you're simply an asshole...

There's a certain record store in NYC that's on Thompson St. that has abuncha these things, and as I check out the internetting of my computer I see a website named Punk Utopia (good lord) has some ...

http://www.punkutopia.com/Merchant2/merchant.mvc?Store_Code=P&Screen=PROD&Product_Code=7IN0139

So get this thing and get to skankin'....

For those who don't know, Oaklands' Never Healed performed on my radio show this week and simply KILLED it. Do yourself a favor and check it out on the WFMU archives. Thanks to those dudes and Charles for the board help.

And how the hell did I go about my life without knowing about these two awesome web presences?

http://cooldudequarterly.blogspot.com/

http://shit-fi.com/

Be sure not to burst into flames....

2007-07-03T13:54:00.000-07:00

I POSE SO HARD, SOMETIMES I EVEN GET AXED TO MAKE LIMITED EDITION CDR'S -- HARDCORE TRIVIA ANSWERS!
Alright all you harder-than-hard Leslie Keffer fans…here’s the answers to the Hardcore trivia…just in time for AmeriKKKa’s burfday…Mosh it up you retards!

1) Dick & The Balls
2) Roger Dean
3) 18th Century Bulgarian Clog Dancing Hymns
4) Flash and The Pan
5) Short lived BB member Cedric the Entertainer. After lambasting Discharge singer Cal with numerous ‘Yo momma so fat’ jokes, Cal left the stage both disgusted and embarrassed. Apparently, his momma (or ‘mumma’) WAS so fat that the back of her neck DID looked like a package of hot dogs.
6) Disregard
7) The Begging Paupers (Tommy Rat era)
8) Pilsnick McNamara (Studio name -- Burlap Sam)
Susan Faludi (Studio name -- She-Who-You-Would-Not-Wanna-Fuck)
Studds Turkel (Studio name -- Bruce ‘Car Alarm Cock’ Froiderminn)
Gumbo MacKaye (Studio name -- Gumbo MacKaye)
9) John Watson/Jimmy the Russian/Keith CFA/Cedric the Entertainer/Roger Miret
10) ‘Beaver flash in Pennsyltucky’/’It was bald…just like Robo’

2007-07-01T19:52:00.000-07:00

STILL CHECKING THE MATRIX AT AGE 34 -- IT'S HARDCORE TRIVIA TIME AGAIN! If you ever gotta hold of the 'print' edition of 200LBU #4, you might know I threw alittle Hardcore trivia on the back cover to seperate the true blue from the name droppers/checkers. I think it really did it's job, 'cause not only did no one send in a complete set of correct answers, but no one even noticed that I more or less ripped off the idea (and some of the questions) right out of Schism Fanzine. I guess it only goes to show you what Sonic Youth said was right, 'You Pose, You Lose'. By the way, if you don't know the band that originally had a song named 'You Pose, You Lose' and really think Sonic Youth came up with that song title on their own, please stop reading now.

Here's a small batch of questions to continue the fun. Feel free to send in your answers and any one who comes close or answers them all will win nothing but maybe my respect and perhaps a vinyl goodie or two. Dig in, pongo....

1) What was the side project of Violent Apathy that did reggae-fied versions of Negative Approach songs?
2) Who was originally supposed to do the cover artwork for the 'Process of Elimination' compilation?
3) On the title cut of their debut LP, SSD sing they will rise above through the strength of what musical style?
4) What band did the bass player of Tampere S.S. join after the bands' break-up?
5) What Bad Brains' member ended a Discharge set in mere minutes of them taking the stage at The Rock Hotel in '85? How did he actually do it?
6) Who did Vile open up for when they played their one and only show?
7) What infamous NYSEHC band shared a member with A.R.E. Weapons?
8) Who was Tesco Vee's backing band for the 'Dutch Hercules' 12"? (Please list both their real and 'studio' names)
9) List all the singers for Agnostic Front
10) How does the matrix read on the 1st pressing of the 1st Adolescents lp?

2007-06-21T09:49:00.000-07:00

STAN KENTON HAS THE HARDEST MOSH PARTS

If you’re the type of fancy dude or dudette who constantly sips their soda with your pinky upturned, it’s more than likely you’ve hoid of Houston, Texas’ Susan Alcorn. The woman has played her pedal steel beside such high falootin’ types as Chris Cutler and Pauline Oliveros while harvesting praise from publications way more glossy than this virtual one. The Olde English Spelling Bee label has just released a super deluxe gate folded vinyl beauty of some of her solo pedal steel work entitled ‘And I Await (The Resurrection of the Pedal Steel Guitar)’ and it’s certainly the finest late night record we (me and the couch) have heard all year. Previous recordings I’ve heard of her were in a group setting and although they were pretty exhilarating, I didn’t really get a full grasp on what she was saying with her instrument. Stripped of the previous surroundings, Alcorn takes full advantage of her solitude and produces sounds from her instrument that poke and bubble and sit and breathe with intense pregnancy that can only come from someone who actually knows how to play her instrument. She certainly ain’t no noisenik cooking up a buncha bullshit so she can rub elbows at the next No Fun Fest, that’s for sure. Throughout the whole disc, the roots of the pedal steel that Alcorn has devoured playing in C&W pick-up bands throughout her hometown can be heard poking its’ head through all the (cough…splutter) ‘experimentation’. Has there been a bookend in weird pedal steel records since Red Rhode’s ‘Velvet Hammer In A Cowboy Band’? Can this be it? Cool! I’m glad we can agree on something….Rest assured, next time I drive that snaky stretch of 84 leading into Taos, I’ll have this seeping out of the rental car speakers to lead me directly into the sun that leads to oblivion.

P.S. -- Believe it or not, no drugs were taken in the making of this review.

To get this direct from OESB, contact them at -- obese@gmail.com

Fusetron’s got some copies too -- http://www.fusetronsound.com/

For more info on Susan Alcorn -- http://www.susanalcorn.com/

Also, if you’re in the NYC area tonight, check this out. Should be a happy good time -- http://walden.phpwebhosting.com/~stevek10/

I could write something real biting right now as a closing line and make it out like it's not directed at anyone in particular like I normally do, but I won't. Let's just say the farther I stay away from warehouses fulla trustfund kids being raped by Todd P, older losers dressed as the 'hipster weirdo' on 'Friends', and bands who play 50 times a month, the better...let's just say that. Hmm...maybe I shouldn't of said that. Oh well...

2007-06-13T12:55:00.000-07:00

ANYONE WITH A BEER BOTTLE IN THEIR HAND WILL BE FUCKING KILLED ON SIGHT
TONIGHT JUNE 13TH
BLUES CONTROL (Personal friends of Choke on MySpace)
WARMER MILKS (From LeXXXington, Kentucky)
WEIRDING MODULE (Skinhead noise like the old days of The Anthrax)
NONHORSE (Yarn X Edge)
8 PM
Silent Barn 915 Wyckoff Ave, Ridgewood NYC L to Halsey or M to Myrtle/Wyckoff http://myspace.com/thesilentbarn

And for you non-NYC dwelling types (Lucky bastards) check out the Warmer Milks on tour as they put their fucking Straight Edge in your face….
June 14th @ Montague Bookmill in the fucking woods of Massatwoshits with XX MV/EE XX & XCharlambidesX (Matt Valentine = Harder than Mike Judge)
June 15th @ Twisted Village in the home of the Edge with SUNBURNED HAND OF THE MAN
June 16th in Baltimore most likely not with either Law & Order or The Bullocks
June 17th @ Whorehouse Next Door in the false home of the Edge
June 18th @ Twisted Branch in Charolttesville, Virginia with Neddy “Paint Cans” Oldham
June 19th @ Café Bourbon in Columbus (Café Bourbon…what a lame name for a club…how ‘bout Café Edge?)
Those kids will have merch out the ass for you…Hooded tank tops, CDR’s with X’s plastered all over ‘em, etc. Buy them all and stay On Edge….

200LBU TOP 10 As of Right Now…
1)The very existence of Mark Perry
2)’Grandma’s Boy’
3)The Cotton lp looking like a bad sXe record from the early 90’s
4)Violent Minds ‘Eyes of Death’ is out…REPEAT OUT!!!
5)Jim Ford
6)Pecca Records
7)The re-discovery of Quiver
8)Peace & quiet due to the filming of ‘Baby Daddy’ on my block (I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried)
9)D.Y.S interview in Forced Exposure #5
10)’What were you expecting? ‘B.J.’

2007-05-30T11:53:00.000-07:00

HOW COME I'M STILL CONFUSED? -- AN AFTERNOON LISTEN TO DRY-ROT I'll spare you all some sorta silly piano intro and just say I think Santa Barbara's Dry Rot might be the most intriguing music group in America today. Their first seven song seven inch entitled 'Permission' was released sometime in the summer/fall area of last year and was utterly confusing. The first side consisted of six quick jabs that actually waranted the name checks of Void, Deep Wound and Child Abuse (The band from long ago who released a single on Mutha, not the pee-pee pants noise band from now) The other side was this real long jam that just sounded like a lost meander from 'Daydream Nation'. Was this the same record? Most who I played it to just shook their heads in question, but I was right there with them. I played the record over and over gazing into the lyric sheet that accompanyed the thing. Who are these guys with their bizarro, cryptic doodlings of fat old men barfing in peoples' faces? What kind of person would write lyrics like 'Don't touch me or I'll bite your fingers off!'? Why did they feel it was improtant to know the single was recorded the day after Hitler's 117th birthday? Even though I have touched base with a member or two of the band and I'm still left curious....

Then what comes in the mailbox yesterday but their new two song single on the Deer Healer label. Limited to 300, already long gone in it's one week in the virtual public eye known as the interweb...too bad suckers! This was the first in a long, long time that I was about to throw something on the turntable and not know what to expect. That was a good feeling. The A Side was a jam featuring a cameo by a member of Sublime (on sax) and the singers' dad on bass. It sounded like a very inept/simplistic (take your pick) take on 'The Great Gig In The Sky'. This was far from the world of puking old men drawings and finger biting. I actually listened to it again to make sure I heard it right. I've listened to it a few times since then and I'm still not sure if I did. The B Side was a perfect fit with me right off the bat. A weirder, more Psychedelic slowburner with random organ whirls poking in and out. The jam eventually erupts into a total freak-out throb that would scare the pants off anyone...even you over there with the turtleneck sweater and the leggings. To think what they might come up with on their next single (To be released on Painkiller) is making me hafta squegee my thoroughly handsome bald head every ten minutes. They'll be around the east coast in August to play, so hopefully I'll see ya there. Look out for me...I'll be the thoroughly ugly guy with the thoroughly handsome bald head.

I'm pretty sure Painkiller still has copies of the first single for sale. They might get a few copies of the new one in a few weeks...who knows? Check it out--

http://www.painkillerrecords.com/

2007-05-26T00:16:00.000-07:00

WHO ME? ...I'M JUST GETTIN' MELLOW WITH MY MERKIN TO THIS COTTON CASSETTE... A few weeks back, the kids behind the Bone Tooth Horn cassette label gave me a big yellow sack fulla tapes they put out. All of it was truly twisted and I was more than happy they were kind enough to fork it along. But there was one tape in that bag that just didn’t jive with the rest of the mix. Where as the bulk of the tapes had me wandering in a tinned out basement full of sharp friendly objects, there was one outta the pack simply entitled ‘Cotton’ that made me think of that big ole house we used to have over on Nichol Ave. in Brunfess around ‘96. That was the house I self taught myself a musical history that was very abnormal for a kid who was jumping on kids heads just a few years before that. Sides by the likes of Mighty Baby, Little Feat, McKay, Help Yourself, Laramie, Quiver, The Sutherland Brothers, Cochise, Formerly Fat Harry, Gary Higgins, Poco, Brinsley Schwarz, Red Television and many other mellow beardos spun as I smoked more and more grass and wished I had a denim couch. What clicked between me and those easy sounds I cannot put my finger on even to this day. All I know is it sounded right at the time (still does I guess) and it pissed the shit out of every member of Lifetime who’d come over to buy pot…so it must have had SOMETHING going for it… Rest assured, if I had any jams by this mystery band who called themselves Cotton back then, they would have been rocked for sure.

After abit more digging, I found out Cotton were a unit out of Fayetteville, Arkansas in the late seventies. Much like the fore mentioned McKay, they were stuck in the middle of America with a love for the laid back Laurel Canyon sound, but luckily held limited resources to recreate those overblown affairs. Much like the limeys who fell in love with the same sounds, Cottons’ melodious ways come off both subtle and skewed. As a matter of fact, the vibe on a lot of this reminds me of that unreleased Help Yourself album from ’73 that was eventually…uh…released on CD by Hux a few years back. Here’s to Kevin at Bone Tooth Horn for getting this out to the masses and here’s to anyone who can score me a copy of this actual LP. Could it be you? Could it? For more info on Cotton, check this out --http://www.soundclick.com/bands/pageartist.cfm?bandID=473333

Huh…just took a look at the BTH site and it sez this particular title is sold out, but I’m sure if you beg nicely, something could be done... Get in touch here -- http://www.geocities.com/bonetoothhorn/

Until then, all I gotta say is bar….bar…bar…barba…barbeque!

2007-05-20T03:32:00.000-07:00

YEAH...PRETTY MUCH WHAT THAT GUY SAID...

2007-05-16T14:44:00.000-07:00

A SOUNDTRACK WHILE YOU PERFECT YOUR KEGSTAND FOR NO FUN... Let it be known Highland Park, New Jersey's (and future DeStijl recording artist) King Darves will be showing up on my radio show tonight/this morning to strum and spin. Shit airs 2 am to 6 am est at www.wfmu.org. For those with jobs and lives, the show will be archived for future pleasure. Enjoy...

Also, I guess I should also let it be known I'll be DJing the opening night of No Fun Fest tomorrow. What I'll play...I really don't know, but I'm sure it'll be shitty. Come up and say 'Hi'. I might be in a good mood depending on what kinda candy you got. If you gotta Take 5 bar, I'm all yours...

2007-05-11T08:40:00.000-07:00

I BLAME SOCIETY AND BANDS LIKE FEATHERS FOR MY ACTIONS...PLEASE ARREST BOTH
Jesus Christ…the amount of seven inches I’ve accumulated in the past year is sorta puzzling. I don’t think I’ve been this single crazy since my short pants daze. I won’t get into my usual tail chasing of trying to figure out ‘why’, I’ll just talk about them and you can buy them if you want. What can I say? I’m a great guy. Buy me a drink next time you see me.

ImperialiSt Pigs are a unit I feel pretty stupid not knowing anything about up until now. Containing a pre-Poison Idea Tom Roberts (A.K.A. Pig Champion), they existed in Portland in the very early 80’s way before ole Piggy would start making late night phone calls to The Fix’s Steve Miller. This single of recently unearthed recordings of the band entitled ‘Corkscrew Porksword’ is real fucking intriguing. Obviously some of the early L.A. proto-core singles were making their way down the pike to Oregon at the time, ‘cause you could pretty much tag this as some lost ‘Bloodstains’ gem if you were blindfolded and force fed carpet samples. To make the situation even more confusing, it seems this has been released on the recently re-erected (duh) Fatal Erection label, home of all the early P.I. sides. Huh… By the by, lyrics about molesting children and sperm facials noted and accounted for.

The beardos over at the Black Velvet Fuckere label just dropped this pretty boss single by The Touched. The details on who exactly these jokers are is pretty slim, but taken at face value, it’s a pretty potent glob of warped garage rock. The vocalist has a cool non-Biafra warble to his delivery and the whole thing sounds like it was recorded at the bottom of a flooded well. One of the guys in the band is grabbing his crotch on the cover and I find that very endearing for some reason at the present moment. So heed this recommendation before my mood dips back into asshole mode…

One of my favorites outta all these little records I’ve done gotten lately has been this eight songer from Albany, New York’s Acid Reflux. This record is yet more proof that ’retro’ is nothing more than a five letter word made up by assholes who’d rather sniff each others’ butts than remove their brains outta their bread bin. Trust me, I’m the last motherfucker who wants to relive the days of ‘goof core’ (If you had to sit through Adrenalin O.D. as much I did, you’d feel the same way) but for some reason, the combination of this units’ blinding thrash and completely retarded lyrics has made me more than happy to be alive the past few days. Songs like ‘Do Your Parents Know You’re A Ramone?’ and ‘Oh Good, There’s An Applebees’ make me wanna throw my head outta my bedroom window and feel the whiz of stray bullets around my head more so than any Frederic Rzewski or Miller Anderson record I’ve played today (Nothing against either gent, of course) Hey, the same crap that was happening THEN is happening NOW, so why not party and scream in the abstract face of total shitdom? Right? Darn tootin’ you know I’m right. Where was I again? Oh yeah…put down that phony fucking hippy bullshit record and buy this from the totally estimable No Way imprint.

I got another single from Cleveland’s Midnight. There’s some sorta big story around them I’m sure. I know they have some connections with Boulder or some sorta horseshit. All I know is this new single of theirs “Midnight Slay The Spits’ is a record I like to play nice and loud like when the neighborhood kids are outside playing with stolen wheelchairs and weapons. The opening track, ‘Nuclear Bomb’, is like some unholy hybrid of the first few singles on both the No Future and Rip Off labels. The rest of the tracks are no slouches themselves, but that one…whew, it’s both a scorcher and a keeper. Stupidly limited with a total cheapo cover, this is the kinda stuff that gives me the hope I need to put on matching socks in the morning.

Like a complete Growing fan (i.e. -- a faggot) I totally missed Italy’s Out With A Bang when they bombarded our country with B.O. and drugs a month back. What can I say? I was too busy mellowing out in the hills of Taos while they installed the hot tub in my crystal mansion, O.K.? Luckily I scored a copy of the e.p. they released to coincide with the tour with the oh-so-endearing title ’Few Beers Left, But Out of Drugs’. This record ups the ante of the previous release in a no-nose holes-barred barrage of frenzied Punkin’ with the brains removed (of course). You remember those reviews Pushead used to write in the old issues of MRR? Well, obviously I do too… Would these guys be offended if I said they reminded me of those first two Yah Mos singles? The Yah Mos? Where the hell did that come from? How do I remember them? Yeez, these seven inches are worse than seeing an old girlfriend…Drudging up memories (maybe) best left in the crawlspaces of the brain. Anywhos…

California’s Shoot It Up are always having their name bandied about by the hip young Punker kids I invite over for candy and drugs, but I was too busy trying to play them my King Crimson live CD’s to really pay that much attention. This new six song e.p. of theirs really makes me feel like a stupe for not paying attention sooner. Yeah, yeah, yeah…those same three chords will always sound ’timeless’ when recorded into a tape recorder with some guy squealing over it, but the fact these guys have the nerve to release this on vinyl is enough reason to fly over there and give ‘em all syringes fulla boat cleaner free of charge. This goes beyond the realm of obnoxious punk into something that both pleases and frightens me at the same time. The day someone with the name of Oscillating Gizzards or whatever can do the same, I’ll eat a fat free smoothie.

You can acquire most of this shizz from the kids at No Way, Check ’em out here --
http://www.nowayrecords.com/

Now let me die in peace…

2007-04-27T09:00:00.000-07:00

UNLIKE BILLY RUBIN, I'D RATHER DO WHAT YOU TOTALLY EXPECT...

Straight up, the post office in my 'hood sucks dog dick for nickles. The other day I came home from work to find a parcel of compact discs shoved through the tiny mail slot with no fucking regard that there might be something of actual worth in there. Most of the time though, there ain't nothing of actual worth in those puffy envelopes, so I don't mind. Just more crappy promo CD's from major indies of shit I wouldn't play in the earhole of the nearest dead relative. But this padded manila held the newest jam from Allentown, Pa's Air Conditioning, something I actually wanted to take time out of my Henry Cow appreciation time to listen to. Luckily, the actual disc (entitled 'Dead Rails' and released on the Load label) and it's guts were left unscathed by the mailman's meanie paws and I gotta chance to preview the shit. The cover comes off like an homage to 'The Land Of Rape & Honey' and I got no qualms with that. Memories of roaring up the Pennsylvania turnpike blasting 'Stigmata' have been suppressed far too long! The rest of the booklet is stuffed fulla pitchers of burning homes and other such suburban vacancies that provide a very wise window into the world that surrounds the boys and visa versa. What does it actually sound like you axe me? Well, first off, FUCK YOU...don't speak to me that way. I'm a grown man and I deserve respect. But anyways...I'd say it sounds like A.C. are gonna hafta finally accept their unwanted crown as the finest heavy Psych band in our country...maybe the world? Opening track, 'Where To Litter/Trash Burning' is kinda what I expected from that Bad Trips record, but didn't get. Loud sounds roaring to be released from a tight, smokey space. Is this what it would of sounded like if Monoshock had heard Breakdown? Hmm... For some fucking reason, the vocal ranting of Robert Jurgensen poking through the din on 'Conclusions/Concussions' reminds me of lady Crass rantings ala 'Shaved Women'...Much like the Ministry memory mentioned above, nothing to be ashamed of. A quick moment of head slung atmospherics entitled 'I Run Low' acts as a breather and a bridge to the disc closing 'Accept Your Paralysis/Cephalexin', another chunker that makes my too-much-time brain swim in reams of unpublished/unpublishable/unformed thoughts on the subject of '74 era Hawkwind winding up at CB's in '88 on a Sunday afternoon. Yeesh...what a thought! Yeah, so most things these days that are described as being noisy/slow/sludgy/etc. make me wanna produce something noisy/slow/sludgy into the nearest commode. This does not... Hopefully that statement means something to you. If it does, great. If it don't, whatever. Nonetheless, I will be eating tuna noodle in five minutes and you won't.

Most Load titles are available through your local hip record shop, but if you feel the need to load (heh heh) Ben's pockets on a one on one basis, go to -- http://www.loadrecords.com/bands/airconditioning.html

Until then...bleech....

2007-04-21T23:23:00.000-07:00

HEY! RECORD THIEF! THESE GUYS JUST WANNA TALK TO YOU...I SWEAR... A large chunk of my record collection was stolen while in storage. Anyone who knows the whereabouts of these records and/or wanna break the kneecaps of the thief and/or would like to donate these records to 'the cause' (ha ho) please get in touch --

Six Organs of Admittance - 1st lp/Hackamore Brick - ‘One Kiss Leads To Another’ lp/Human Instinct boxset/Billy TKs’ Powerhouse lp/Dreamies lp/Negative Approach - ‘Live Your Life For You’ bootleg lp/Edgar Broughton Band - all lp’s/Yod 13 CD boxset/Sonny Sharrock - ‘Black Woman’ lp/David Ackles - 1st lp/Sapphire-lp on Sound At One/NNCK - ‘Live at Kens Electric Lake’ 2lp/NNCK - ‘The Clearing’ 7”/1st K Salvatore lp/Bridget St. John - ‘Ask Me No Questions’ lp…

…There’s probably tons more, but these are the few I noticed missing right away…Maybe it’s for the best…I just would of sold them anyway. At the present time, most music sickens my stomach if it isn’t The Sandpipers or Antioch Arrow. As it gets warmer outside, more assholes are outside my window stabbing one another for soda money and doing retarded dances. I grow disgustingly bitter and wanna get out of the city. Happy Spring!

2007-03-31T16:35:00.000-07:00

GOT SLUDGE IF YOU WANT IT...BUT IT COMES WITH A COSMIC PRICE Years from now, when Matador will be known as the AmRep for the late double o's and Matt Kosloffs' pubic hair will be auctioned off at Sotherbys', there will be kids digging through piles of chest hair and gravy lookin' for obscure artifacts from this time in weirdo history. There will be plenty of CDR's, 7"s, etc. filled to the gills with poser shit, but I'm supposing there will be some stuff worthy of the dig. One such dinner plate will be this Snake Apartment 12" just released on the Parts Unknown imprint. Rhode Islands' Snake Apartment seem to fit snugly in with your Urinated-On Trousers...your Cockcleaners...your Helmodummies, etc. but what they got that those dudes don't is two peg legs both rooted firmly in those shitty 80's and those even shittier 90's. Sure, these guys know the second side of 'My War' like the back of their schlong, that's a rather obvious (and very beautiful) thang. But the opening track on this disc, 'Paint The Walls', was a hard flashback to fifteen years ago on those first couple of listens. I shut my eyes and sprang back to Tad yelling at kids in my hometown to stagedive. Was this good? Do I even own a Tad record anymore? After awhile, these self Stalinized thoughts became decent memories and made me think, 'Shit, maybe I should get those Vertigo records outta hock?' Is it time for a re-think on Helmet? I guess anythings better than staring at the walls... Nonetheless, the dudes evenly worship the sludgy riffage of Ginn and the Sub Plopped 90's headshaker sound with equal aplomb and pretty gnarly results. Maybe I'll even knock the remote off my paunchy gut and see these guys if they're stupid enough to wanna play New York. Hot damn! So...if you consider yourself 'Mr. Vegas', send twelve bones to fatrich1@yahoo.com and lemme know what you think...Like I give a shit...

There will be a slight decline in posting here for a week or so. Shithead ghetto youth and banker asswipes have caused me to need extreme therapy in the form of hot rock massages and breakfasts at the Frontier. Hopefully you can get along on your own.

2007-03-17T22:17:00.000-07:00

COLUMBUS OHIOS' VEGETATIVE STATE HAVE BEEN WATCHIN' YOU THROUGH THE WIND-UH!

Above -- Vegetative States' spiritual leader receives a happy ending from hot gook gash.

Since those culture vultures over at the Bull Tongue have hepped themselves to Clevelands’ Homostupids, the collective we had to find some new young Midwestern Punker necks to sink our tender fangs into. After much perusing of countless distro websites, we settled on this three song single by Columbus’ Vegetative State. What made us settle on them you axe? Well, the cover seemed to be a homage to Don Knotts, a sure sign of quality. I just figured, anyone willing to be so blatantly retarded in the graphics department has to have something going on in their musical pants. And as usual, I was right. Reports tell me the cats behind these tunes are of the young and drunken variety and it certainly shows. The two tracks that make up the first side have an inept quality to them that sounds like an early live tape of the Germs or that first Court Martial single played by mentally challenged walruses. The flipside of this single was the thing that made me really sit up and take notice though. It’s this long winded Psychedelic Punk mistake entitled ’Laguna Beach Rules’. It sorta lumbers on for awhile in a weird fumbling fog until the guitarist busts out this solo that sounds like it’s straight off of ’Kings of Oblivion’ or something. Is all this blundering a pose? How can you sound like you failed a tryout for Maniax one minute and then mimic Larry Wallis the next? The record is just this huge, hanging question mark for me. A total mystery item. A total mystery item with a MySpace page…. Oh brother! You can order this sucker for four clams here --
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=21529336

Now someone get me a flea bath...quick...

2007-03-14T08:26:00.000-07:00

C'MON IN EVERYBODY! AN EARLY MID-LIFE CRISIS FOR ALL THE WORLD TO SEE!!! A few weeks ago, a buddy and I drove down to Philly to see an honest-to-goodness real life Hardcore show in the year 2007. The line-up couldn't be beat I thought. Canada's Fucked Up, the recently resurrected Philly Hardcore legends YDI and Virginia's Government Warning. As the days grew closer, the shittier my work situation became and my contempt for the adult rat race grew. I counted the hours until we left on this trip and wondered in my head if I would actually clock some kid in the pit while Fucked Up busted out that 'Police' jam. I had a checklist in my noggin of all the new fangeled Hardcore platters I would pick up at the show. Yes, I agree it was sad, but it was helping not clock a client in the mouth, so I stuck with it. One night when I was walking home from work, I thought how much I needed something like Hardcore now more than I ever did when I was a kid. All I had then was an implanted hatred of the norm. Now I have bills, a crap job, an honest fear of everything and no hair. What do I have to go off to in my current situation? Tell me!

The ride down was great. Good jams and kindly fat asses serving fried chicken. After a few beers, we walked down to the hall where the show was going on. 'Y'all think it's Woodstock down here?!?' axed a street urchin to a group of fresh-faced Hardcore kids. Ah, guff from the local color. Perhaps Punk Rock hasn't changed that much... Government Warning was already rollin' when we got in. Within seconds, as corny as it sounds, everything felt real. I'm not saying I had some post-revelatory moment. I'm just saying the energy felt pure. Government Warning were tight shit with a drummer that's a phenomenal spiritual son to Lucky. Kids knew all the words and good dives were done (Feet first...nice touch!) While I was watching them, I flashed back to Flipside videos of Stalag 13 and Adolescents. So far, so good. I'm usually pretty opposed to seeing reunited Punker bands, but I felt the need to see YDI as I found them to be an open-ended case in my life. My brother had their 'A Place In The Sun' 7" and that record really intrigued me. When I finally got to see them as a tot (Opening for Samhain maybe?) there was not a flannel shirt or bald head in sight. Elbow length leopard skin gloves and frizzed out hair is what I got. I just caught on to all this aggro face to face and everybody was going metal or wimping out. I was bummed. Their singer Jackal came to the stage tonight in an old ass Upstarts shirt and leather pants. He said it was nice to be playing in front of some 'young guys' rather than 'old farts in bars'. He seemed happy. I mean, as happy as you can look singing songs like 'I Killed My Family' or 'Mad At The World'. There was certainly nothing offensive about it. They was no pandering or posing. Why should I suspect that in the first place? Is there really anything they should expect to gain? These are the thoughts I wrangled with as I kept gazing at Jackyls' Upstarts shirt and thinking 'If he takes that thing off, I'm grabbin' it and running off to Mexico'. A few old faces were caught up to (If you told me I'd be in a room with the likes of Robby Redcheeks in my 30's, I'd think you're on the pipe) and I went to swill more beer during the wait for Fucked Up. I guess in the interim of guzzling brews and shooting shit, someone let off a fire extinguisher in the hall. The whole crowd was more or less standing outside the hall covering their faces. Again, more proof Punk Rock never changes. Once the hall was cleared, Fucked Up started out with 'Police' and my compadre said 'Shouldn't you be killing someone right now?' But I didn't. C'mon, the idea of a grown man beating the hell out of some kid in a sleeveless Japanese HC shirt sounds funny at first, but in reality it's sadder than sad. So I just stood to the side and pushed back kids that barrelled into me. One guy seemed like he was doing it on purpose, which in my pittin' days, was an extreme no-no. I pushed him by the neck while holding either end with my pointing finger and thumb. It was then some large kid with a shaved head said in my ear 'Yo, you can't be doing that shit!'. I rasied my brow and squinted at the kid. It was then I knew I couldn't go home*. Madonna's 'This Used To My Playground' played in my head and I sulked to the back. Why was I someplace where some kid is telling me what I can't or can do? Why did I push this kid by the neck? Fucked Up played for awhile with numerous technical difficulties which sorta was bringing me down more. But overall, I'd say the evening was a success. Much records were bought and much sweet beautiful drunk talk was made over Black Flag and Judge. But will I go to another HC show again? I'd say 'yes'. The lofts of Brooklyn are filled with bands I've seen over and over again. Even if I've never seen them, I feel I have. Some might say the idea of HC in this time and age is kinda weird. I think so too and that's why I wanna dig into it. The sight of the guitarist of Government Warning in a Chronic Sick shirt was mindblowing to me. This thing has legs and gotten to the point where the kids started dictating the history. It needs further investigation. So excuse me if I misplace that Birds of Delay review somewhere, I'm listening to 86 Mentality.

2007-03-07T08:31:00.000-08:00

WHO BE THE KING? Pictured above -- King Darves performs after getting over what looks like a bad case of V.D.

A few months ago, I went off on some major props fest here regarding all those crazy kids in the New Brunswick/Highland Park area of New Jersey and their crazy ways. Most of them I knew in the CDR/cassette format and I done seen a few with my own peepers to know they were legit, but the one that was still cloaked in a cheesecloth of mystery to me was this guy from down there who went by the name of King Darves. I saw a few of his tape releases lying around at a relatives' apartment, but I was too busy at that particular moment gettin' lifted and listening to all the newest blippity bloop 12"s' to give it a listen. So friggin' finally I get a hold of a CDR he did with the title 'The Sun Splits For...The Blind Swimmer' a few nights ago and I gotta say I'm as bowled over by this as I've been by all that shizz from the same area rug. For some reason, I figured he was either doing some sorta big boned noise thing ala the thing he does with Mr. 2673 named Asps, or a lame 'New Weird' knock-off. So I was rather shocked and pleased when the prettiest sound with a deep, rich voice came out of the headphones that made me tap my toes and nod my head like a little goil. Now, I get the feeling you're gonna take one look at the photo of KD pictured above and think 'Oh boy! Another guy with a beard and an acoustic guitar, where's my ax?' But it ain't like that I tell ya! The bedrock of this' mans' conncoction is certainly folk based, but he ain't wearin' no headband and singing of pixies. This is somewhere between rollie cigs and the foggy vision of Big Pink from somewhere on Jersey Avenue or maybe a one-manned Meat Puppets. And this kid can really cobble something together in his kitchen sink. I haven't been this dizzy for a one-manned (genuine) musical matter since last years' Colossal Yes disc, which is really saying something if you've ever been around me when I'm in my 'Drunk and boring you with shit you don't care about' mood. But where Mr. Yes wants to be Elton John fed through Kendra Smiths' kidneys, Mr. Darves wants to be Dick Curless fed through a Rutgers' students' bowels (Right after the Tuesday night veal loaf) You get my drift? Enough gay ass word play...Get with this kid at his MySpace thingy and tell him to make more and feed them to a public too fat on Wooden Wand as well as his vanishing shlong...

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=32085219

Other good shit that might get talked about when I'm not so bloated on garlic...

Various Artists -- 'No Bullshit Volume 2' 7" (No Way)
Mala -- 'Bury Da Bwoy'/'Hunter' 12" (DMZ)
Government Warning -- 'No Moderation' 12" (Feral Ward)
Vegetative State -- 7" (Death by Noise)
D. Charles Speer -- 7" (Sound @ One)
Koro -- 'Speed Kills' 12" (Sorry State)
Order -- 'Kickball' 7" (?)
Emeralds -- 'Dirt Weed Diaries Vol. One' CDR (Maim & Disfigure)

2007-02-25T03:32:00.000-08:00

I GET ME MEDICIDE FROM THE NATIONAL ELF...

The inner debate still rages on with me about the amount of records I order these days from labels with such names as No Way and Painkiller. Is this a mid-life crisis or just a rethink of roots? Hmm... One thing's for sure, no matter how many spins I give that Wasted Time 7", I still got plenty of couch and grass time for anything revolving around the London based Morphogenesis troupe. The subtle creep and sweep of their ways has made many a late night seem like a pit of lush silver to me and that 'Stromatolites' jam from the late 90's still sounds pretty keen-o. Morphogenesis' Adam Bohman (pictured above) did up a solo joint sometime in '99 or 2000 entitled 'Music and Words' that I thought was a real crack-up. Lots of bed springs scraping and whatnot while Adam kept turning the handheld tape recorder on and off to tell you what he had for Boxing Day dinner at the folks' house and other such important facts. Repeated listenings to the disc proves the fact that the more mundane an object is, the more fascinating it becomes. So when I found out that another solo thing of Bohmans' had just come out on the Paradigm label (a racket owned and operated by fellow Morphogenesis member Clive Graham) entitled 'Bunhill Row', I snapped the sucker up real quick like at a local spooge shack and ran like hell back home to bust out the sweet green and lissen to it. When I got home and started to check out the cover, I gots alittle confused. The amount of song titles on the back rivaled the first D.R.I. LP or any Inca Eyeball release for that matter. Nothing went over the three minute mark. Something was fishy. Are these....like...ACTUAL SONGS?!?! Turns out the LP is a collection of bedroom recordings done by Bohman in the early 80's when everybodys' head in London was fulla demented homespun dreams. The gush of short, playful and downright juvenile improvised songs this LP shoots off is a real groin scratcher. Is this really a member of Morphogenesis? Not to stereotype, but I'd figure a member of this band in his late teens/early twenties would be practicing puffing on a pipe and saying 'Rather', not creating skewed pop tunes about old women and their vibrator collections. If you're a sucker for anything British, primitive and catchy, you need this like a Israeli rock star needs a cigarette in the eye and a good shove. If this came out at the time it was recorded, you know Chuck Warner would be re-issuing it and some hipster doofus would be trotting Adam around NYC introducing him like he was his new pornstar girlfriend. For now, it sits in the distinguished company of other forgotten artists re-discovered by Paradigm, like Brast Burn and Daphne Oram, which ain't no nothin' to sneeze at. Done up in a numbered edition of 500 and the whole bit...go grab it before those Paradigm snewts find out some Cro-Mags fan told you about it...

http://www.fusetronsound.com/label.php?whomart=BOHMAN,ADAM

2007-02-18T02:37:00.000-08:00

WHAT'S ITALIAN FOR 'DUH'?
I know to all the youngsters who still scour the pages of Maximum Rock 'N' Roll, Italy's Out With A Bang are old, old hat. So all you P.Y.T.s' out there can go back to downloading Swedish Hardcore demos and Swedish Hardcore Porn while I provide my service here to those (kinda) oldsters who are in a rut with their record buying and need some numbskull Punk Rock in their lives. I mean, you know more noise records are just gonna make you feel crappier about your lot in life. Are you buying these records for further listening pleasure or just to have a bunch of squares to line your shelves so's you can keep up with the jerk off Joneses? You could start really getting into collecting Black Metal I guess, but if you're gonna do that, why not just move to Williamsburg and buy a poodle? Don't get me started on all the cookie cutter floppy hatted juanny-come-latelys on the new weird circuit. I am a firm believer that the world will not return to being a garden of light until Vetiver die a slow, painful death right in front of my eyes. So I say the only way to get out of this rut on both a personal and spiritual level is to buy more records with song titles such as 'Do What My Cock Says' and 'Hurt Yourself'. Only then will you feel better about yourself and the world around you.

So, Out With A Bang released this one sided 12" on their own last year entitled 'I'm Against It' that set the Punker underground on it's ear with a ton of buzz. By the time I caught wind of it (wudda stench) the thing was long gone, snapped up by the whipper snappers on their skateboards and unicycles. Good for me that those repellent little bastards at the Fashionable Idiots label out there in Minnesota did up a domestic re-do of the thing, this time on a two sided seven inch. The grainy ass picture on the lyric sheet of this thing makes these guys look like Killroy ('member them?) or Circle of Shit, a real bunch of dirtbags full of leather, bristles, studs and booze. But their jams ain't real limey influenced at all. As I spin the disc more and more, all I can think of is a looser limbed Adolescents recorded in a friggin' toilet, which is a pretty sweet thought I think you'll agree. I know my rather lazy description of this disc doesn't really make it sound anymore unique than a million other Punker records out there, but it really holds something special in it's determined retardation. Since I've gotten hold of it, I have a spring in my step and a flutter in my heart. Turns out I just caught that peanut butter salmonella...

O.W.A.B. are coming to America in a few months, so go crush up your sisters' diet pills into a snortable form for them NOW. Go to the Fashionable Idiots website and mark the days until they come to your town. I guess you should order the seven inch while you're there too. I mean...if you wanna...

http://www.fashionableidiots.com/

2007-02-14T08:32:00.000-08:00

BLITZ BUMMER ...Sorta ironic that my last post had some veiled reference to a Blitz lyric, as I have just found out that Nidge, founder of said band has recently passed. Turns out he was taking some scab laden line-up of his band across the U.S. when he was struck by a vehicle somewhere in Texas and died instantly. The fact the guy was hauling around America in the late '00's is strange enough. For his life to end on some barren strip of highway so far from his home is even stranger. He most likely was wearing some sorta lame ass Punk get-up when he died too. It's something straight out of 'Ladies and Gentlemen, The Fabulous Stains'. All they would of needed was The Magik Markers as their opening band and it would be perfect. Nonetheless, I know the dude's passing might mean nothing to your smarty pants self. To be honest, it really doesn't mean that much to me, except that the dude's music set me on fire as a kid. Still does. All I have to hear is those opening rings of 'Someones' Gonna Die' and that's it. It's on. I know, not as cool as saying some obscure Pysch jam inspired me to be a total asshole, but I'm tryin'...I really am.

2007-02-11T01:47:00.000-08:00

THE RECORD IS STILL BROKEN AND I STILL DON'T CARE (JUST LIKE THE KIDS ON THE STREET) Above -- Me showin' off my new tat. Wait'll ya see my Skullhead back piece. You'll shit five ways 'til Sunday!

Alotta the bigwigs out there in the chronic cocktail party they call 'the scene' keep axin' me 'Where's the updates? Where's the info? What's your opinion on the latest vacuum cleaner noises put onto a disc so's some grown man or woman doesn't have to go out and get a real job?' Believe it or not, I try to be diplomatic with these gentle souls when I tell them (in the nicest way possible) I could really give a shit about most of the crap they ask me about. At this point in the game, I feel no need to listen to anything that's going on in this cock licking competition for people who (I guess) missed out on being popular in High School. It all makes me ill. We all know you liked Indie Rock in High School, so please remove that brand new obscure early 80's Foreign HC shirt at once. Where did you buy that shit? Hot Topic? You are aware you're an adult, right? Jeeze. It all reminds me of that Lester Bangs quote from the year before he died that went something like 'Wanting to listen to Hank Williams or The Velvet Underground over The Go-Go's or Squeeze isn't a matter of nostalgia for me, it's just a matter of good taste'. I hear the man on that one. Why the fuck would I want to familarize myself with the latest hollow whack-off from Matthew Bower or John Olson when I could listen to The Byrds or Cressida or Grand Funk or (even better) complete utter silence. Besides the hordes who try to be something that they're not, the other thing that really makes me sick are older people who say it's 'important' to 'keep up' with what's going on. They sniff around whatever The Wire deems 'relevent' and ask what DubStep twelves are 'essential'. It's like fucking corpses fighting off the maggots. They think if they actually sit back and enjoy something for a moment that they'll fade away into the wallpaper of life. Shit man...that's what I dream for! When I'm 50 years old, the last thing I want to be doing is hanging out with the 2023 equivilent of Lambsbread or Loefah or whatever. I hope I have enough sense by then to be either retired or dead. Here's to hopin'...

BITTER OLD MAN PLAYLIST

Step Forward - '10 Song e.p' 7" (Painkiller)
Homostupids - 'The Intern LP' CD (Parts Unknown)
Al Stewart - 'Orange' lp (CBS)
Richard Lerman - 'Music of Richard Lerman 1964-97 ' 2 CD (EM)
Tony Hazzard - 'Tony Hazzard Sings Tony Hazzard' CD (Rev-Ola)
Eric Matthews - 'It's Heavy In Here' CD (Sub Pop)
Catherine Howe - 'What a Beautiful Place' CD (Numero Group)
The Ray Pacino Ensemble - 'Be My Lonely Night' tape (LalLalLal)
Bob Dylan - 'Modern Times' CD (CBS)
Dry Rot - 'Permission' 7" (Cold Vomit)

2007-01-26T06:58:00.000-08:00

CRUCIAL CACOPHONY AT THE CRUCIAL CAKE SHOP COCKSUCKER! TOMMOROW @ CAKE SHOP 152 LUDLOW ON THE LOWER EAST SIDE IN NYC AT 8PM FOR 7 DOLLARS...MAGIK MARKERS/HOMOSTUPIDS/BLUES CONTROL/RICHARD AND JON (Or as I like to call them 'EXCITINGS!' get it?) PLUS DJ SETS FROM BRIAN TURNER AND TONYA RIOTMAN. SHAVE OFF YOUR BEARD, GRAB YOUR GENNIES AND MOSH!!

2007-01-24T14:05:00.000-08:00

GET YOUR KAFTAN, BITCH...WE'RE GOING FOR A RIDE...
Awhile back there in the '01, I went on about the Babe in the pages of Fuzzola's Blastitude in a painfully sucky manner. There were some facts and words, but that's about it. I don't really think I nailed down how much this early 70's UK bands' music means to me, especially their second and final record, 'A Jug Of Love'. Their self titled debut from '69 was an amazing blend of California dreaming and English mysticism, a totally essential listen for anyone who enjoys lit windows and brown shag carpeting. Their second record from '71 pretty much saw them chuck all the limey vibes out the french windows and go full bore ahead with their interpetation of the American dream. The whole thing that continiously lures me back to records cut by these English bands from the early 70's is how well they beat the American pioneers of this music in mish-mashing styles. Quicksilver, The Band, The Byrds and Poco were all the same to them in some polarized vision, so out spat some truly mesmerizing and strange records. There's equal measures worship of both Richard Manuel (Just listen to 'Virgin Spring' for dick's sake) and the faux dirt cowboys from the hills. Why MB guitarist Martin Stone (also having served time in Savoy Brown, The Pink Fairies, Chilli Willi and The Red Hot Peppers, etc.) doesn't have a bronze statue in my living room, I really don't know. Anywhos, the people at the Sunbeam label did up a real nice thick vinyl re-ish of 'Jug of Love'. Go buy a garbage bag full of oregano and enjoy this disc in a proper fashion. http://www.forcedexposure.com/artists/mighty.baby.html

2007-01-21T04:57:00.000-08:00

MACRONYMPHA CAN SUCK IT!

Not one douchebag in a brand new Negative Approach shirt in sight...perfect. I wish I had a time machine to take every No Fun attendee who thinks seeing a bunch of guys dry hump one another and throw garbage cans around is a 'radical' statement and dump them off at CB's in '88. Oh what fun that would be! Communale sighting in this video noted and accounted for..

2007-01-17T13:52:00.000-08:00

THE BOSS JIM GETTYS ARE DEAD...LONG LIVE THE PLUM STREET SPOT... What kinda 'authority' am I to talk about all these new and exciting true-to-life disorienting sounds the kids are kickin' out these days? I sit here in this dustbin of an apartment jamming 'Bella Donna' and Soulside's 'Trigger' 12" over and over again while so many with holes in both their souls and pockets mull over this stuff and spit out their opinion like so much onion dip. They usually end their opinion with 'Limited to 50...act today!' but who cares? I guess if the sounds is potent, they potent...no matter how many are made. But if I know anything, I know that when I was a young beardo dwelling the streets of New Brunswick, New Jersey in the early 90's, the place was a serious cultural wasteland. Still feeling the blowback of being such a hip city in the late 80's, the burg was a fuckin' pit of despair. Tons of horrid Stooges copyists still thinking Bruce Pavitt was gonna roll through town with a time machine and a contract to make a jillion albums while giving an advance of Swallow twelves. It truly sucked. Me and some of my bros tried to stir some shit, but we were looked at like pointless card tricks. I remember trying to convince some indie rock douchebag he should book NNCK (circa '96) in this loft space he had. He treated me like total dogshit and then proceeded to play me tape after tape of his crappy space rock band being produced by one of the guys from Tortoise. Bummer city, U.S.A population me...

So now there's this total happenin' noise/psych shit rock scene going on there and I gotta admit I'm abit jealous. How come all these kids in their homemade costumes get to have so much fun in that town in this post-Wolf Eyes blowin' up world? But shit man, I'm happy for 'em...even ecstatic you can say. They got a happenin' party palace there on the same street I used to live on and some decent touring bands always stop there. And some of these units they got goin' on there are pretty hapennin' as well. USA Gold Exchange seem to fill their 'large ensemble' quota, jamming out quiet, creepy jams for those of us who still hold their copy of 'In Public and Private' close to their crotch. 2673 has been on the scene for awhile but he still don't get the recognition he deserves. Maybe if he donned some heavy eye make-up and wore communion dresses people would care...I don't know. I haven't really heard any of those King Darves jams yet, but I'd like to. Human Adult Band I've actually hoid and it's some damn good sludgy shit rock shit with some obnoxious ass wiggling to spare. But the whole stupid reason I started this spiel, was to talk about this new 7" entitled 'Jar' by New Brunswicks' Car Commercials. Car Commercials includes a dude named Dave whose done stuff under the name Ladderwoe and has a finger (heh-heh) in the fore mentioned USA Gold Exchange. It also includes that dashing lil furball Daniel DiMaggio, who you might know from his Home Blitz fame. The two dudes do up some real demented jams on this slab. Tape recorders get shut on and off, sped up...slowed down and then they bust into some rockin' and then some close-talkin' microphone action. You like the Prats?early Shadow Ring? Do you get joy outta knowing there's kids half you age that are as fucked up as you? Then, mister...jump on this today! Limited to....ahh...y'all HAD to see that one comin'. But seriously, get with these jokers and get a copy of this single. It's a dingaling up the shnozola, lemme tell you...Dave in CC does the Leaf Leaf label and here's their MySpace page where you get hooked up with a corn-a-coppola of stuff from the home of The Golden Rail...here's the linkage

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=28758210

Other than that, I really dig this compilation that was just dropped on the Non-Commercial label entitled 'Battle of The Worst Bands'. If I may spew one of my usual stand-bys...In the early to mid 90's, I was an ex-Hardcore kid smoking weed and seein' how many records on the United Artists label (circa '72) I could find (I still need that Halfbreed record...anyone holdin'...drop me a line) The idea of abuncha dudes in Cleveland making up 'joke' Hardcore bands at that time and putting out singles of them in minute editions would of amused me, but I surely wouldn't of listened to them. But now I'm old and angrier than I ever was at 16 (How'd that happen?) and those dudes were cool enough to put them all on one LP in the present day and I'm lovin' it. Cider and The Darvocets I've heard of before and they make up the first side of this thing. The Cider stuff (Originally released as the 'Out To Get Me' 7" in 1994) has got a brash UK Hardcore sound that would most likely scare the bejesus outta every hipster doofus who creamed their expensive 'vintage' jeans to the lame sounds of No Fucker a few weeks ago @ The Glass Lands. Their cover of NA's 'Last Warning' is an 'interpetation' at best, but that's whats so marvy about it. The Darvocets are like a thrash version of The Rezillos, complete with lyrics about spacemen and shit like that. I still got a lump in my pants for both Faye Fife and her goofy tunes, so you know I was down with that. Apparently they are actually playing this weekend here in Brooklyn, but I gotta babysit a copy machine that night, so I'm screwed. The second side has gotta single released by The Ruiners in '99 entitled 'Blank Your Life' which has gotta cool early Boston vibe to it but the winners of this battle of the worst bands has got to be the closers of the record, Brainwashed Youth. Apparently holding a member of Integrity (?!?) this is most likely the stupidest thing I've heard in awhile and I am ever so happy to hear it. With horrible phony British accents and inept musical ability, these guys make the Maniax sound like King Crimson. I almost crapped my pants listening to these guys....who am I foolin' with that 'almost' part? Ha! These suckahs were done up super limited (here we go again...) so jump on this like a Gia Paloma blow-up doll. Here you go...http://www.noncommercialrecords.com/

'Til then...'come in out of the darkness...'

2006-12-30T23:43:00.000-08:00

MY TOP TEN OF 2006 INCLUDES BOTH ME AND YOU DEAD... PLEASE FILL IN THE OTHER EIGHT SLOTS YOURSELF... Above -- Yet another shot from the 200LBU Holidaze party. Ricky belts out a heart wilting rendition of 'Too Deep Until Now' by Chain of Strength via karoke.

For those who care about that sort of thing, my fave crap of '06 can be found over at the FMU and Ecstatic Peace sites. I'll put links to it at the bottom of the post. Dig on it you sexy things, you. Since this was such a bonny year for music, there was a few things I totally forgot about when I scrawled down these pointless lists in an indecipherable scrawl (Praise be to Saint Laughner) Colossal Yes was played so many friggin' times around the Classon castle that it was sorta forgotten when it came time to make these lists. It's crawled into the walls like a cute dead squirrel whose stink smells like a scented candle from the classiest painted wagon in the nicest mall in New Jersey. I gotta copy of 'Tumbleweed Connection' hidden in my ascot and I'm not afriad to show it. Neither does Mr. Yes. I wanna hear more of these jams, but I want them to sound like Glyn Johns produced the fucker, not some hack from the early nineties. Shit...did I say that out loud? Gotta stop doing that...should make that a resolution for the new year ahead or whatever...

And another I forgot to list was Boxcutter's 'Oneiric' jam on Planet Mu. Mr. Barry Lynn made (to me) the only sit-throughable electronic groove full length of the year. As much as I love all these cwazy 12" singles I've accumulated throughout the year (Big up to Chamberweed and Dr. Don Cream for hipping me to alot of them) I gotta say when these Dubstep/Whatever cats shoot out a full length of the shit, I'm bored within the first fifteen minutes or so. It's not their fault though. Much like early Hardcore, the stuff's only good in short spurts when you're rockin' it at home. When you're out and about and within a crowd, it's a total different story. Or that could just be me. But I've spun this 'Oneiric' thing more than a few times and it still sends ice cold razor blades up my spine. Dig your nails into the ass of 'Sunshine VIP' and FEEL IT. Yup...she's a keeper...

Brooklyn B-Boys Blues Control don't need no nod and wink from yours twooly, but what the fuck? Let's do it anyways...All their cassettes jams (esp. the one on Fuck It) were sheer grace. Like watching Mike Post jam out in a Parisian cave. Can't wait to see what happens on the real deal full lengths coming out on Holy Mountain and Woodsist. Dig in and let's see what the Red and the Black has for us in the ought seven...

Like I stated in the post prior to this one, this is the first year in my life where I've ever felt conciously bitter and bored with music, even though there's been so much that's sent my heart a twitter. From Home Blitz to Violent Students to the re-issue of Jackie Mittoo's 'Wishbone' to all that output on Hot Flush and DMZ. Fucked Up sent my mind into too many inner debates regarding the idea of song as a celebration of oppression or spirtual arrival. But then the idea of abuncha maries slapping each other with their purses to 'Negative Approach' creeps into my head and I wanna move to a cave with nothing but a copy of 'Younger Than Yesterday'. I guess all I gotta do is never leave the house in '07 and have all my records and information delivered to me by small Peruvian boys and I'll be AOK. Anyone know any small Peruvian boys???

http://blog.wfmu.org/freeform/2006/12/tony_rettmans_t.html#more

http://www.ecstaticpeace.com/2006poll.php

Oh yeah, go over and look at this kids' deal...I like his steeze...

http://atwarwithmetal.blogspot.com/

And take a look at this friggin' rapist...

http://www.flickr.com/photos/sixorgans/331158526/

MERRY NEW YEARS EVERYBODY!

2006-12-19T22:34:00.000-08:00

SHIT FROM A NEW YEARS NOTEBOOK -- AKA -- A FOOT WITH A MATCHING BULLET Above -- Group shot from the 200LBU Holidaze partee -- BACK ROW --(From left to right --Annonymous member of Satanic Witchery, Annonymous staff member of Dusted, Meadowlark Lemon, Devandra Banhart and annoymous 'guest' of Mr. Banhart FRONT ROW -- (From left to right -- Jimmy Pursey, 200LBU editor-in-chief Coach Smothers and 200LBU co-editor Tonya Loiterminn.

For some godforsaken reason, I’ve taken to ingesting the extract of watermelon seeds every few nights this week. While under the influence of that sweet, sweet shit, I‘ve taken notes in a ‘year end‘ fashion. It’s all a buncha hooey. A blur of Crisco and Rolex and all that kinda stuff. Take from it what you can…

Call off your dogs, I got nothing to tell you. Nothing more than what I’ve ever told you in a million other ways, being the whore that I am. New noisy punk dudes, kids in warm-up suits around South London, moldy favorites found under the bed…it’s all still news to me. Seems strange the first year I’ve actually felt bitter and bored with music is the same year I’m so blown away by most of what I hear. Let’s just say crowds give me gas and if you ever want to just come over and jam records, I’m down. It’s gotta be better than watching a thousand shlongs wag in motion, licking each other to the beat of acceptance.

I think Dolman said it a month or so back, but 2006 was certainly the return of the weird, cool idea of actually pressing up a few hundred singles of yourself and selling them. Sounds kewky , don’t it? There was the Home Blitz shit, The Jacks, Homostupids, Armas Huutamo, Velveeta Heartbreak, Sex Vid, the Religious Knives one, the list literally goes on and on. Some of them were great initially, until their veneer of intrigue was wiped away when you learned the artist posted on a message board twenty times a day and had a webcam. Mystery has been replaced with an unneeded knowledge of everything it seems. Not to sound like a blue hair with a cane underneath my armpit, but think about if The Misfits, Throbbing Gristle or Combat Stance Fanzine had the interweb in the day and time they existed. Would it have worked? Could they maintain that much of an image while telling you every time they took a crap? I’m sure brighter people than I have debated this issue, figured out the problem and then both ate and scored with Bernadette Peters and Shirley McClaine. Good for them. For now I beat on a rock and rock the seven inch jams of the year. Ain’t gonna make a list though…didn’t I already sorta do that up there? Leave that shit to the others. All I gotta say is these singles gave me a good amount of exercise running to and fro the turntable and that’ll add a year onto my life. Fucking great…

Jack off with pride in the year 2007 if you scored a copy of ‘For Sada Jane’. I’ve been watching the clock for awhile now and the arms keep moving real fast. I keep the thought of movement constantly in my mind. Stumbling is movement. Falling flat on your face is movement. Pushing the two actions together and holding them together with spit and chewing gum and keeping them intact is the job of the Markers. Anyone who has been watching for this whole time will tell you this is where the wormhole has been leading. ‘Shabbetai Tzevi/1666’ is a stoned gem that burns. Up and over, over and out…give me the time and I’ll tell you everything I heard from a twelve year old last week.

2006-12-17T03:45:00.000-08:00

I THINK THE SOLE REASON COMPUTERS WERE INVENTED WAS SO WE COULD ALL WATCH THIS 1ST VIDEO...OH YEAH, THE REST OF 'EM ARE GOOD TOO...

2006-12-17T03:41:00.000-08:00

2006-12-17T03:17:00.000-08:00

2006-12-17T03:12:00.000-08:00

2006-12-17T03:05:00.000-08:00

2006-12-17T02:55:00.000-08:00

2006-12-11T13:42:00.000-08:00

I GUESS FAIRIES DO WEAR BOOTS...

2006-12-06T09:18:00.000-08:00

I'M BACK SLEEPING OR FARTING OR SOMETHING (ALL YOU EMO KIDS WHO GOT THAT REFERENCE, TRADE ME THE NOT FOR THE LACK OF TRYING DEMO ASAP) Do you know how many times I've gotten this far? Went to the 'create post' screen, picked out some silly photo, threw it up there and just stopped. Didn't even get as far as staring into a blank screen. It seemed almost immediatly I would think "This is fucking pointless...how is this going to get me money, drugs or pussy?" It was then I 'd retire to my bucket of Crown Fried Chicken and wallow in a pool of poultry grease and self loathing. But it was fun while it lasted...call me sick, call me twisted (just don't call me late for dinner!) but there's something really beautiful and therapuetic in the act of renting bad movies and chronic scratching. Some told me I was crossing over into real 'Carl' territory for awhile there, but I think I'm back for now. It wasn't all totally pointless....The local Crown gave me a free bucket of chicken for that endoresement a few sentences back, so that's cool...

So what have I been listening to inbetween repeated watchings of 'Little Man' and walks to the store to get smokes? Let's go through this pile on the floor and take a look.... Although every fucking promotional blurb for this new 'Best Of/Retrospective' Josef K thing (entitled 'Entomology') would make the average blood pumper wanna wretch a pretty stream of blue ('For Fans of Franz Ferdinand') you can't deny the jams still sound real good. Shit man, do you remember when you could enjoy a good herky-jerky limey beat without some college grad mentioning some new school group of aqua net users? Those were good times...But one keen earfull of these Scots is all I need to watch the goggle glassed throngs blast away on a cloud of fart dust kicked up by whatever 'free folk' unit they're hyping this week. See you on the pages of Pitchfork assholes! You get all the gloomy hits from the Postcard releases (It's Kinda Funny', 'Forever Drone' ,and my personal fave, 'Heart of Song') and a throng of tunes from the always rumoured, never hoid 'rejecteted' 'Sorry For Laughing' lp. Tacked onto the end is their last Peel Session, which yields a confusing cover of Alice Coopers' 'Applebush' that makes me love these sad widdle boys that much more. I can't really remember any other re-issues that came out this year (I guess I'm still having some 'Carl' moments at this date) so for now, I'll say this is my 're-issue of the year' and be done with it and wait for Domino to send me a bucket of flan for this endoresement.

My boys in Philadelphia, Violent Students, have just done up a brand new spankin' CD-EP on their own Richie Records named 'Street Banger' and I encourage the purchase of it for the simple reason they hold compromising photos of me weeping in a pair of tighty whities while a copy of 'Tapestry' can be seen vividly spinning in the background. I love these boys so much, that I will personally make sure their long awaited opus 'Towelhead' will see release before the end of the year on a label that does packaging that looks strangely like this 'Street Banger' CD. Hmmm.... http://www.testostertunes.blogspot.com/

Also based outta Philly is that there Meg Baird who you might know from the Espers band. Her solo two song single goes by too damn quick for it's own good as far as this ole fat bottomed squirrel's opinion goes. The cover of my favorite Fraser and Debolt song is like some weird message from a satelite that runs on fried food and Yuengling that this thing had to have a home here in Classon Castle. Apparently, this single should be treated as some sorta 'teaser' to the upcoming full length to be released by Meg in the new year. Consider me teased. Hopefully filthy Tonya Vodges still has some floating around his Tequila Sunrise fortress. Contact the ole boy here and find out -- http://www.tequilasunriserecords.com/

A few months ago, in a fog of double chins and wooded wangs, someone handed me a personalized package of sounds that I thought was real sweet. The look and feel of the object just shreiked care, and I was touched. That was until I threw the thing into the disc player. After listening to it, I felt 'touched' in a different way. Since I'm the type who showers in a wetsuit, I can't really point to the spot on the doll where I feel 'touched', but trust me, it's there. Did I hear someone go to the bathroom? Did someone just half assly quote 'All Cried Out' by Lisa Lisa? Why are a bunch of crazy bitches telling random bad jokes on top of one another? ..And it begins again. The CD-R is question is 'The Lexie Mountain Boys Play Sexy Fountain Music' by the Lexie Mountain Boys and it can be obtained at -- meetamountain@gmail.com

I can't help but look at the cover of this Never Healed 12" and think it looks like the soundtrack for 'The Blair Witch Project III -- The Search for Curley's Release demo', but I gotta say the thing kicks ass. Imagine if Rorschach drank and fucked more and listened to Motorhead instead of Slayer. This group of Northern Cali kids get the goat moving when all it wants to do is eat cans. Apparently a fuckload of these were damaged when someone told Frich Slappendorf (CEO of Parts Unknown, the label that released this album) there was a copy of the Pratt lp hidden somewhere in the shipping. So you know what that means...limited supplies of modern Hardcore at rock bottom prices on eBay! Ha-cha! Whoever scores me one of those Never Healed/Violent Minds split singles first will get constant mentions in my writings for years to come! No flan required! Just score me that record! For now, send your money to Parts Unknown and Crazy Jay will send you a copy in the next year or so -- http://www.partsunknownrecords.com/

Alright, that's more than enough. Hopefully I'll come back before the year is out and talk about the Skream lp and other shitte. For now, to join in with the big boys in webtastic functions, please take part in 200LBU's 'Best of '06' polls. Post your ballots in the comments section. Tanx!

BEST TELEVISION SPECIAL OF 2006 -- A) Scott Walker and Clay Aiken -- A Mother and Son Reunion Live From New York B) 'A Very John Allen Christmas' Christmas Special C) 'American Pioneers of the 20th Century -- Sid Sludge'

>BEST BAND OF 2006 -- A) The Sandpipers B) The Byrds C) Fucked Up
> BEST SHOW OF 2006 -- A) Two dudes at bar during Magik Markers set at Northsix B) Max Eisenberg appearence at Bernstein/Miller wedding C) Dancefloor inbetween XO4 and Blues Control last Friday night
BEST RECORD COVER OF 2006 -- A) Donna Roitminn - 'Harshing My Mellotron' B) Mouthus - 'I Trust My Cock, Etc. (i.e. -- Balls)' C) Lambsbread - 'Water Damage'
If you have any other 'honorable mentions' for 2006 PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE submit them (to me) P.S. -- Co - written by the beloved Grimace...

2006-11-13T15:28:00.000-08:00

TOM LAX ISN'T THE ONLY BLOGGER WHO CAN EXPLOIT HIS PAST! -- 200LBU # 1 10th ANNIVERSARY RE-PRINTS AVAILABLE....READ BELOW....
Ten years ago, Nick Forte and I were just like these two random youngster douches I just stole from the internet. Ski-capped, high as hell and, most importantly, bearded. We were running high on the fumes being kicked out by the Forced Exposure mail order lists and whatever Actuel we could find that week. Those was the daze... If you told me then I would be listening to more Warzone than MEV in my old age, I most likely would of crawled into a small hole and wept, but I was a total faggot back then, so whatever. Nonetheless, all the new sounds we were discovering inspired us to put together a fanzine named The 200 Pound Underground. The first issue came out 10 (fuck!) years ago this month. K-wazy! In the past ten years, I managed to kick Nick to the curb (I'm a total dick) and squeeze out 5 (fuck!) issues by myself. Some people have shown interest in seeing those early issues, so without further a doo-doo...

I have done up a limited (100) re-print of the first issue of 200LBU. It features interviews with Brian McMahon of The Electric Eels, Eddie Flowers of Crawlspace, Mooseheart Faith as well as fiction written by the dearly departed Jim Shepard and a tour diary from New Zealand's Brother Love. There's also a review section where everyone from The Grateful Dead to The Infections to NNCK to DJ Spooky (Please, don't axe...) get much love. If you're interested in getting a copy, e-mail me at -- t rettman at hotmail dot com and we'll work it out.

Next time, I'll talk about musik...right now, I want your money...

2006-10-21T15:02:00.000-07:00

WHERE'S THE MUTHA WHEN YOU NEED HIM? -- THE JACKS AND THE RETURN OF 'SHORE CORE'

When I was just a mere nipper of a napper, my family and I used to take yearly vacations down to the Jersey Shore. Most of the time they were pretty uneventful visits. My older sisters would get drunk and try to hook up with guidos from North Jersey while my parents and their friends would get drunk in our bungalows while playing cards. Which left lil old me with really nothing to do. In my sad little mind danced a bizarre (Bizarre for a twelve year old) obsession with the Beach Punkers of Southern California. Skate parks, dudes wearing leather jackets in ninety degree weather, turf wars, etc. All this stuff was implanted in there by numerous readings of my older brothers’ issues of Flipside, We Got Power, and other SoCal Punk rags. I thought that maybe, just maybe, there had to be something similar going on at the sandy terrains in our state. No such luck, shmuck. I would ride my skateboard up and down the boardwalk hoping to find one kindred soul or even someone who would beat me up for being a poser, but there was nothin’ doin’. Little did I know there was that whole Mutha scene going on somewhere near by, but even though it was close to the beach, I wouldn’t really consider any of those bands ‘Beach Punk’. Most of those guys just looked like they wanted to be in The Anti-Nowhere League and seemed pretty tame and lame at the time. If only I knew then what I know now. I’d be a proud property owner from all the copies of the Send Help single I woulda scopped up at that weird ass record store on Morley’s Pier! But I digress…

If only I had found The Jacks ‘Concrete Death’ single amongst all the musty second hand copies of ‘Nantucket Sleighride’ and Chronic Sick singles back then, I would have been psyched . In typical shitty fashion, I find it twenty something years after the fact when I can't stand on a skateboard for five seconds without crashing to the ground in an elderly heap. But I’m still psyched I found out about it. Awesome mid-tempo beach moves with hooks a plenty and a real dense though fitting recording job. And they're from the Jersey Shore man! And even though the idea of something like this in this day and age might sound abit cheesy to the bitter contingent reading this (Hello brothers!) it ain’t. Lyrics about cruising down North 35, feeling weird about trading your stick in for a job in the city, smelly book smart hippy punks, etc. Shit man, where’s Mark Chesley when you need him to put this shit out? I guess these guys are just gonna hafta reap the benefits of these swell sounds by releasing it on their own. If I coulda sandwiched these tunes in between some Symbol Six and Simpletones on the mix tape I blasted on my walkman those lonely days down the shore, it wouldn’t have been so bad. I guess for now I’ll just sandwich them in between some Agitation Free and Distance on some CDR and be happy with it. Check these cats out on their MySpace page and buy a couple copies of the single off them while you’re there. http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=3451584

And while you’re still using this glorified typewriter, splooge on over to the Wounded Galaxy blogspot and check out David’s rather awesome observations on music and fun. This Canuck has got the fever and it won’t go down. http://woundedgalaxy.blogspot.com/

…And check out Jay Hinman’s newest blog-o-sphere entitled Detailed Twang, an obvious reference to everyone’s fave Brit art punk nutises The Door and The Window. I knew you couldn’t keep the Hin-mann down…http://detailedtwang.blogspot.com

So, I guess that’s about it for now…next time perhaps some musings on more gemstones of sound of an interview or just plain ole bellyaching…either way, you know you’ll love it…

2006-10-15T00:51:00.000-07:00

I'D TELL YA...BUT YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE IT... Once again...So sorry for the lack of correspondence in the past few weeks. I was tieing up some loose ends with actual writing that will actually pay, so you can understand why typing away at something that will be seen by no one but the converted might go to the back burner. No offense to you old chum, old pal, old one last ticket for the ten o'clock showing of 'The Marine', but sometimes (believe it or snot) I got bigger fish to fry. Yeah...It shocks me too. Nonetheless, expect more than usual in this space in the next few weeks. Aren't you exicted? Yeah, I can feel it, man...

The other reason I haven't been floggin' at the bloggin' is that I haven't really had much scratch to spend on records these days. Been diggin' through the crates lookin' for gems of yore that put a spark under my booty after I sparked the buddah back in the daze. One gem I re-discovered was that Harsh Reality jam 'Heaven & Hell'. I remember checking this out due to some parakeet like dude telling me it had some sorta Sensational Alex Harvey Band connection. After much research (Pre-internetting, fools) I found it in fact didn't have any connection to SAHB and felt somewhat roked, but once I started to jam the platter, I felt an immediate connection. A good feelin' to know. The tracks are sorta all over the place in a good way. One minute you're listening to a Brit blues jammer, the next some sorta melancholy Procul Harum shit and before you know it, one track will sound like it should be off of 'Mr. Fantasy'. Not to say this is all some second tier compilation record of British Rock of the 60's...no sir. Just giving you an easy understanding of what you're getting into. That's my job. My non-paying, self-assigned job. Yeesh. Just lettin' you know it's a good one to discover again or discover right now. As far as I know, even the CD re-issue of this is OOP, so hopefully you can find it used somewhere. If you wanna an OG vinyl copy of it, prepare to chop off a limb or a relatives'. I guess you can get it at one of those new fangled 'file sharing' sites the yobs all talk about. I'm too much of a stinkin' hippy to do such things.

I sure did see that 'American Hardcore' film. I sure did...I sure as hell did...What? My opinion? Um...it has YDI footage...that it sure did...hmm...I wish they interviewed more women than coatracks...It's easy to wipe your hands clean after 1986. Harley rules. MDC are talked about for 15 minutes and the beginning of their portion starts off like 'Star Wars'. What the hell is that? These guys had one good record...if that. Pfft. See...you got my blood angered up. Did I tell you there was YDI footage?

I interviewed Princeton prodigy Daniel DiMaggio (AKA Home Blitz) for Uncle Eddie Flowers' truly happenin' Slippy Town Times website. Check it out here -- http://www.slippytown.com/2homeb.htm Yes, that is right...I'm real lazy.

Sometime in the next week, either here or on the FMU site, they'll be more writing. Most likely about Fucked Up making the record of the year (Did I stutter?) The re-emergence of shore core with The Jacks, The two most recent cassettes by Car Commercials, and how I have convinced more than one person that one of my heroes is a rapist. Keep on sploogin'...

P.S. -- I forgot to mention I have finally gone totally helmo and started a MySpace page...Will you be a froid on MySpace? Will you let me meet you on MySpace? Will you let me show you some lame ass picture I took of myself in the mirror on MySpace? Will you find me in the toilet on MySpace? Will you suckle at the teet of Fritz on MySapce? Will you read me your life storyon MySpace? If so, get with me here...uh...um...'friend'....(I wanna die) http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=117065918

2006-09-12T22:25:00.000-07:00

THE BIBLE OF THE STREETS TELLS ME I'M ALWAYS RIGHT WHEN I LISP
The sound of urine hitting the bottom of a trash can is a normal occurrence in my nape of the neck, but sometimes it’s special. The other night I was out on the roof when I heard that usual gentle gushin’. I looked down to see if maybe I was missing some sorta watersportical hooker moves, when lo and behold, it was none other than Zachary Davis from that infamous Ohio improv crap rock band Lambsbread. Zac was scoring this new heroin/Gatorade hybrid drug on my corner and just decided to take a wee. How quaint! He tolds me they was in the area to both score drugs and play down at that wine cellar known as Tonic. He said I could get a ride with them if I promised to play ‘The Cinderblock Game’ on the ride there. Just then a chunk of wax the size of Bea Arthur’s clit fell out of my ear and I knew I was in for serious bidnit. The ride to Tonic found me chucking the cinderblock at this one cat with a blue bandana hanging out of his right pocket. Fucked him up bad. I came this close to spilling my mudslide down the front of my M. Ward t-shirt when we finally hit the Tonic. Outside were all these kids who were turned away from the Harley’s War show at CBGB’s. They all had on leg warmers and were jaggin’ to the beat of ‘We Gotta Know’. Fuckin’ total Nicole Ritchie shit. I was in their heads bouncing off their brains and they didn’t even know it. Blah.

As my hands started to swell back to their normal size, I had this weird flashback to a time I never had as a child. Riding bikes down a barren suburban road with a blonde haired girl. There was a chill in the air and some sorta (Jesus Christ) hint of hope riding through the electricity in the spokes. There’s just one thing…I never learned to ride a bike. Damn you Daniel DiMaggio! As you know since you’re such a hip motherfucker, Daniel is this kid outta Princeton, New Jersey who records under the moniker of Home Blitz. He put out this three song 7” earlier this year that sent many old men into heart attack mode. I was no exception in the situation, except for the fact I am not THAT old yet…dammit. He just pooped out another one entitled ‘Live Outside’ and where the first one brought jumbled visions of too many pixie sticks and not enough ass ointment into my preverbal ‘mind’, this one gets me all wistful and makes me wish I hadda window to stare out of that wasn’t caked with dust and splatterings of Taco Bell Fire Sauce. Gives me some sorta flashback to innocence I suppose…remember that shit? Yeesh…Maybe you won’t get so fruity when you listen to this and treat it as an actual frickin’ object. Get at Daniel and he’ll hook you up http://www.myspace.com/homeblitz

So back at the club, Lambsbread hear the news that Britney Lohan had her second kid and they burn a dumpster fulla weed in celebration. No wait…I meant to say they burned a dumpster fulla homeless people in celebration. Either way, it’s awesome. Afterwords, they decide to play and burn on fumes of utter nothingness with contempt that’s got some expectation in it’s corners. I remember this time when I was a dumb ass kid and I took too many of these pills that Rosenburg nicked outta his Dads’ medicide cabinet. His Pops had some sorta back problem and these things were supposed to help it abit. All it did was make me wanna run up and down the street yelling ’Senior Week!’ I then felt like I was gonna shit my pants, but I was still happy to be alive. This is how Lambsbread make me feel. I know they would be so proud. Ten minutes is all you need of their blowout and you feel fucked. I wish that was how long my whole ‘trying not to shit my pants/running down the streets of Newtown’ episode went on for. Sadly, it went on for awhile and we missed going to see Unwound because of it. I guess I did us all a favor…Hi-Oh!
Lambsbread got shit’s coming out on Parts Unknown, Ecstatic Peace! and ninety million other labels ‘cause niggas wanna piece of the flavor. You want a piece too, dontcha? Too bad…go back to your studio apartment you faggot ass! Things will never be the same ‘cause you never treated people right! At least that’s what someone told me… mmnddsfgr@yahoo.com if you wanna get with the ‘Bread.
I really got nothing else to tell you. Why don’t you tell me something? That would be interesting…

2006-08-25T06:17:00.000-07:00

THE MAN PICTURED BELOW IS A RAPIST -- AN INTERVIEW WITH THE HOMOSTUPIDS

Day in and day out, my mailbox brims with utter crap that I have no use for. Letters telling me what I owe (Good luck getting it, dipshit) and what I need. Those manila enveloped, official looking jobbies that are merely ploys to join some white slavery ring organized by non-profit groups posing as white slavery rings….you know the drill. And then there are those mountains of garbage promo CD’s that can make a good man go bad. How Brian Turner and people of his ilk don’t go up to the nearest bell tower and start picking people off with a high powered rifle while uttering ’So many Jade Tree promos…So many Jade Tree promos’ is beyond me.

But, every once in awhile, a surprise comes in the mailbox that makes it worth putting on pants and leaving the house at dusk. One such surprise is a three song 7” recently released by a group outta Cleveland named The Homostupids. As soon as I opened the anonymous packaging and saw the name of the band and the cover of the single (A real dumbo drawing of a skull with a thunderbolt slashing through it) I was smitten as shit. It was almost like I didn’t have to listen to it! Thank God I did. In this past year, witnessing the utter brutality of units like Philly’s Violent Students and Pissed Jeans, Ohio’s Lambsbread, etc. has given me a giddy spark that the fucked up kids who love The Cro-Mags AND The Brainbombs AND The Dead C. AND Keith Hudson will finally have their say. Throw The Homostupids in that mix of kids. Recorded in the red and out the door, this single has a dunderheaded mean spiritedness that sucks in all the above mentioned sound burglars and shits it out totally splatter effect stylee. You could do no worse than to go to their MySpace page and pick up one or two or the entire pressing. Go to -- http://www.myspace.com/homostupids and shit’ll be sorted.

The following is an interview I conducted here at the 200LBU offices with one Steven Peffer, who claimed to the bass player in The Homostupids. As of ’press’ time, we have no proof. But if you could see the dent he left in our supply of Wild Turkey and all the blood he left on our collection of Bad Brains bootlegs, there’d be no doubt in your mind that this guy was both homosexual AND stupid…read on….

200LBU --Have you seen my pipe?
Steven Peffer :What do you mean? What kind of question is that?
200LBU --Never mind…How and when did you start jamming? Were there any other bands y'all were in prior to the Homostupids? How did you homos get to know one another?
Steven Peffer: Maybe a year and a half ago, I had an idea for a band I wanted. Simple repetitive bass lines under thin wanking guitar with simple song structure. I did a 4 track thing and enlisted some help from a friend or two. It came out good, but not what I was shooting for with an actual band idea. That recording will be titled “The Brutal Birthday" e.p. and it will be released as a 7” on Richie Records out of Philadelphia. Anyway, I found 2 dudes I didn't know before hand through just asking around over and over. That's Dale and Josh. They're great and the sound I had in my head kinda morphed into the 3 of us playing whatever it is we're playing, which I guess is very close to what I hoped for. I was listening to the Dwarves "Blood Guts and Pussy" album, The Grabbies and Supercharger. That was kinda the inspiration. I guess that's not a clear answer to your question right?
200LBU --Not even close, but who cares? Where exactly do you live in Ohio? Do you play out a lot?
S.P: We live in Cleveland and I like it here. It’s cheap. Food is cheap and rent is cheap and girls here have nice round full breasts. They don't come to see us though. I don't know what the reaction is. it's hard to gauge something like that I think. People tend to be drunk and dishonest, so I don't know and don't care too much. We just keep to ourselves and play once every other month or so. No other bands here play similar sounding music to us it seems, which me thinks good.
200LBU--If you could back in time to see any band perform live, who would it be and why?
J.P: Maybe when Metallica first got Newsted in the band and they would play secret club gigs as Vertigo. That would be cool! Share a small stage with Kirk and the boys!
200LBU--Yeah, I’m sure Kirk would love sharing a small stage with some boys. Are there any bands around now that you feel some sorta kinship with?
S.P : I don't want to say "kinship" but I like very much The Clockcleaner and Out With A Bang from Italy, also Shoot It Up from California is very good music makers. I like Cococoma from Chicago very much. Who else is good for me? Let's see... Throbbin Urges have an LP on Dead Beat that is over the top and right to the point and loudy too. I like that.
200LBU--How did you become pals with them there Violent Students?
S.P: Well, John jr. is the drummer I think, right? He moved to Cleveland for like 2 years and we were roommates. So I've known him well and good for like 5 years or so. I think he's the one who got me mixing tuna in with macaroni and cheese, which I still do. So he's my ‘in’ with that band. Richie, the basser in VS is a buddy of John Jr. so I know him through him and so on. They are nice dudes and have helped our band quite a bit whether they know it or not. I don't know what Richie's diet is like, but John Jr. doesn't seem to eat as much meat these days. I like the stuff and usually in the summertime I don't eat much meat. The heat limits my appetite, but this year red meat has been on the menu every week just about. Meatball sandwiches, kielbasa, bratwurst, salami, Lebanese bologna. all that shit.
?#6--Um…O.K. So, what are the future plans of Homostupids? Shows? Records?
S.P: Not much I think. We're recording an LP this weekend so we'll see how that goes. We play in town like I said, about once every other month. We have some out of town stuff lined up but we're limited to what we can do. Josh has a wife and a daughter and we don't have much money or reliable transportation. Also, we don’t have much motivation to go out of town and suck each other off or whatever.
200LBU--Again…‘Um, OK…‘ So, who is going to put out this LP? How many tunes will it be?
S.P.: It's kinda up in the air as to who's gonna release it right now. I'd like it to be on both vinyl and disc at the same time, so whoever can do that and pay for the recording wins!! I think it'll be like 10 songs… maybe 12. It depends how many come out the way we like. We'll record 15 songs total though, all live. My friend Paul just built a lovely very accommodating studio and has a large tile bathroom that we will set up in. we'll see how it goes. Blown out I hope.
200LBU--How did you come up with that rad ass name?
S.P: My first year outta high school, I started listening to alot of high energy garage stuff. My friend Stephe and I would eat some acid and for the first wave of it, the speed would slowly ride up. So, during this part we'd jam out Supercharger and The Mummies and shit like that. Jump up and down and sweat, then the mellow paranoid part would come in and outside we'd go. Then, the speed would come back when the mellow washed away and then hell crept in. So, while on the initial speed rush we brainstormed our high energy slop-o stupid as shit inept garage band and it'd be called the Homostupids. There you go. This was 9 years ago. We had one practice and that was it. I folded up the name and kept it in my pocket until I needed it again.
200LBU--Let’s do some word association….Jackson Browne…
S.P:Rapist.
200LBU--Necros
S.P.: Overrated
200LBU--Wait a second..You think the Necros are overrated?
S.P: They are pretty good I guess. I just don't think they are as special as people make them out to be. Don't get me wrong though, they are better than most Ohio Hardcore bands from that time I guess? Better that Articles of Faith... YUK! Lyrically and musically they seem kinda Hardcore by the numbers, that is Necros not AOF. AOF is just plain g-a-y.
200LBU--AOF were from Chicago, but I guess we’ll just skip that…back to the word association…Bella Donna…
S.P: Injun
200LBU-Painkillers…
S.P: Penis
200LBU --Fucked Up…
S.P: Canada
200LBU -- DubStep
S.P: Kit Kat
200LBU -- Neil Young
S.P:Danny Whitten
200LBU: And finally…Max Milgram?
S.P : Penis penis.
200LBU: Very good…end transmission.

2006-08-04T10:53:00.000-07:00

I CAN DEAL WITH CHICKS SINGING AND THAT'S ABOUT IT -- PART ONE

A few months back, Jay Hinman called me his bro-in-arms or something regarding our love for the girlie sounds. He wrote something about him and me being the only ‘dorks’ that care. DORKS? Sir, we are not dorks! I’ll tell you who a dork is! A dork is someone who weeps when their CDR limited to 5 gets hosed down by a D.J. just trying to show a crowd abit of fun. A dork is someone who discovered the Circle Jerks last year and then wants to debate on the proper way to mosh during Hair Police. A dork is anyone who writes an eight hundred word review on anything musical. But most of all, a dork is anyone who doesn’t have virtual air conditioning rushing through the cracks in their toes when they hear something as vital and alive as Twinkle’s ‘What Am I Doing Here With You?’ or anything off of ‘Dusty in London’.

Like most things, I don’t consider myself some sorta ’real life’ expert on these sounds. The reason for this could be because of my humble, self-deprecating demeanor. Or it could be because I fear a nation of cardigan sporting dudes who live in their moms’ basements telling me my girl group tastes are ‘pedestrian at best’. Nonetheless, I know what I like’s and that’s all there is to it. On these past days of absolute swelter in the shelter, I cranked up the A.C. as high as it could go, put on my beehive wig and white lipstick and jammed the jams that make women swoon, men shudder and take cattle off their feed. Here’s a sampling --

Dusty Springfield - ‘I Start Counting’
Sort of a cheese bag fusion-like intro kicks this lush one off and then that voice that could sooth the harshest of sun blisters kicks in and makes me wish I had some sorta consistent hook-up on pills that make everything look like a scene outta ‘Casino Royale’. I could never go into the technicality of the actual sounds created here…I’m too much a dolt on that front. All I know is this lady’s voice has made my life seem not so shitty from the deserts of New Mexico to the grey tinged streets of Bed-Stuy. I’ve lifted many a gin and tonic in my living room on a lonely night to her. Maybe you should do the same…just make sure no one’s around.

Val McKenna - ‘House for Sale’
Like I stated above, I don’t claim to be some know-it-all on this shit. Most of my ‘knowledge’ of it comes off the beyond excellent ‘Dream Babes’ compilations that the ever lovin’ RPM label has been shooting out over the past few years. All I know is Val busted out some singles in the mid-60’s with James Page on them that are quite stellar. This one isn’t as dreamy as some of the other jams that’ll be listed. Even though it’s got kind of a sad vibe to it, this tune’s gotta hip movin’ feel about it that might get you either sympathy sex or two minutes on the dance floor with an actual girl. The decision is up to you.

The Caravelles - ’Hey Mama You’ve Been On My Mind’
Another one off a ’Dream Babes’ comp (Volume Five) that’s like a gush of strong sea air rushing through my constantly retreating hairline. Total limey Spector worship done by two London office girls that went by the names Lois Lane (!) and Andrea Simpson. This track mixed with a little weed, and a little a.c. will make you feel like you’re in heaven…or at least in someone else’s living room.

The Supremes - ‘I Wish I Was Your Mirror’
I don’t care what anyone sez…the Ross-free era of The Supremes is staggering. The whole record this one comes off of (‘New Ways But Love Stays’) is a blurring trip of good vibes. It could be World War Three outside while this song is on and I’d still be all smiles. Have you ever seen me smile? It’s quite an occurrence when it happens….trust me.

Twinkle - ‘Take Me To The Dance’
Hinman wasn’t too impressed with ole Twinkie, but I think she’s the Brit girl shit. Most of her self penned tunes are heart string pullers about boy pals dying in motorcycle crashes and the like, but ‘Take Me To The Dance’ is a groover about nothing but the simple joys of being out and about with a person whose company you can tolerate for more than five minutes. I wish I could find that sorta bliss…

Abit ‘cut-off’ I agree, but I got more writing to do, hairs to be cut, rooms to be cleaned, and Odyssey records to listen to. If you’re in the Brooklyn area tomorrow (8/5) come on down to the Hook in Red Hook. Monotract is having a party for the release of their CD on Ecstatic Peace, ‘Xprmntl Lvrs’. So far, it’s one of my favorite things I’ve heard all year. It makes my hips move like rubber wheels and I can’t say that about much else out there. You’ll also get the chance to check out Magik Markers, Mouthus and the NY premiere of Canada’s Panopiticon Eyelids, another thing that’s sure to turn your socks to shit. DJ’s will be DJ Beard, DJ Gray and DJ Gaye. See you there…

2006-07-20T20:11:00.000-07:00

THERE ARE SO MANY REASONS TO LIVE...AND DIE...AND EAT...AND TO DIE AGAIN...
I could care less. You’re all fools. I can’t wait to see you fall..and Winter…and Spring! This weather sucks. I swear I saw the devil in the living room last night. The following tunes cools me...

THE COOLER CRIT TOP 18
Esther Williams - ‘Last Night Changed It All’
Homostupids - ‘Caveman’
Still Life - ‘October Witches’
Violent Minds - ‘Hit List’
Carl Carlton - ‘I Won’t Let That Chump Break Your Heart’
Awesome Color - ‘Ridin’
Burial - ‘Distant Lights’
Velveeta Heartbreak - ‘I Shot The Invisible Man’
Monotract - ‘Projectus’
El-B featuring Juiceman - ‘Buck & Bury’
Jimmy Pursey - ‘One Night in Paris’
Digital Mystikz - ‘Ancient Memories’ (remix by Skream)
10CC - ‘Headline Hustler’
Geeneus - ‘Congo’
Funeral Shock - ‘Dead Scene$ter’
Dusty Springfield - ‘Bad Case of the Blues’
T.U.M.E - ‘Love Shortage’
My Own Hands - ‘The Sound of You Slowly Dying’

Now go enjoy a nice bit of crack and read

THIS

. It’s all you really need. Whether you like it or not, you pathetic trend-hopping loser. See you down at the Tonic!
P.S. -- Do I need to leave an emoticon to show the sarcasm in that comment?

2006-07-09T18:29:00.000-07:00

WOULD YOU TRUST THIS MAN WITH YOUR OSCAR? I DIDN'T THINK SO... Above -- Ben Chasny relaxs in the backyard of famous Pornstar Seymore Butts before shooting his cameo for 'Sex Organs Of Admittance -- Get Your Freak Folk On...'

I look around at the piles of dirty socks and empty boxes of smokes on the floor. The other half of the double bed is a pile of old fanzines and mustard bottles. About twenty times a day I think I should get my act together and become an actual fucking adult. But just when the upstanding gentleman in me starts to take over, the phone rings and some sorta codger is yapping down the line to me about his dogs’ eating habits and tales of amps being traded for dope money and I sit there in rapt attention while ants crawl out of my laptop. I know I sound like a broken record, but I gotta say it’s a sad though interesting existence. People are nice enough to send records and they just sit there while piles of Dubstep 12”s’ are purchased and ‘Blue Letter’ gets played over and over again. But I took the time to listen to this Velveeta Heartbreak single that came in the post the other day. The A Side is a good enough lo-fi faux glam rave-up. This Michael Bowman character (A.K.A. The V.H.) is most likely some sorta Pop prince, so he might not understand I’m praising him when I say the riff that drives this track sounds like a leftover from ‘Rock ‘N’ Roll All Over’. But I’m praising you man…trust me. The B Side is a sorta sappy piano jam about the death of a Wilson brother that kinda mad me uncomfortable in the same way a weeping man on the corner does. Yikes. Nonetheless, ‘E’ for effort and all that. Get a copy at -- velveetaheartbreak@yahoo.com

Zac ‘Mild’ Davis unloaded a crapload of stuff on his Maim & Disfigure label on me awhile back and I never talked about it. I’m a dick and many people can attest to this. The majority of it was stuff by his bombastic Blast!-meets-Blue Humans power trio Lambsbread and all that shit kills, no doubt. But my fave amongst the lot was a solo jam from Zac that he calls Sky Juice. The CDR he passed off was entitled ‘Live At Brokeback Bridge’ and it’s a disorienting, low budget stew of Melvins riffage, loner/stoner folk and basic fuckedness. The boys’ not right and that’s why I think I might have had some drunken one night stand in Ohio when I was 10. It coulda happened! But one look at the handsome laddie will tell ya I had no hand in the doing of his making. Wait..wasn’t I supposed to be talking about a CDR or something? Oh yeah, so this Sky Juice jam, like all the Lambsbread jams, is available through Maim & Disfigure. Give Zac some time to recharge and have some juice and he’ll send out your shit post haste.

Alotta man bitches like to talk shit, but then they realize ‘Gilmore Girls’ is off the air and they tie their shoes. Those types won’t be diggin’ the roar of this Violent Minds CD recently released on the Parts Unknown label. This sucker collects both the 7”s’ they released in 2004 and a cut off the ’Town of Hardcore’ 7” comp from the same time. All eight minutes of it bring to mind The Abused, Blitz, Negative Approach and Court Martial. Can you ask for more? Well, in the next month or so their full length entitled ’Eyes of Death’ will be out. Is that enough? How about this quote about V.M. from Don Rettman himself?. -- ’I guess Pig Champion didn’t die in vain!’ What else do you want? RIOT! RIOT! 1200 Pound Gorilla approved. www.partsunkownrecords.com

Can anyone get enough Afternoon Penis? I for one cannot. I can take it anytime, anywhere. A new A.P. jam entitled ‘Up All Night’ is out on the Our Mouth imprint and it’s a ramshackle, raw percussion jam for all those who enjoy long toilet breaks and giving out cigarettes. Lotsa hip shakin’ homemade beats rise outta all the whining feedback and make me night dream about Nasty Nate doing a collabo with either Skream or Mick Fleetwood. I’m still not sure yet. Get your copy from the Fusetron empire or from Nate directly at fungalorigin@hotmail.com

There’s tons of other stuff that gives me a charge these days, but it sure ain’t music. Sleeping in my own filth, drinking Blue Moons, plotting revenge, staring at walls…these are the things that fuel me to occasionally lift a lip. Oh yeah, there’s also both of those Digital Mystikz 12”s’ that just came out on Soul Jazz. Buy that shit if you’re not too much of a mouth breather. If I only I could find a publication to fund my trip to South London to see this team in action so’s I could lose control of my ‘number two’ functions in the most dignified way possible. I’m sure with the right sound system, this shit makes Deathpile sound like Juan Denver in comparison. Why am I such a jerk? Because I’m fat, bitter and never been loved. I thought you knew that already.. Get both these twelves from Forced Exposure and tell ‘em no one sent you.

Next time, they might be an interview with a mystery guest….there might be more reviews…there might be more pathetic bellyaching…Hey, who knows? I’m not in control here. See you on the corner of 7th and A….

2006-06-30T17:12:00.000-07:00

IMAGES SPEAK LOUDER THAN MY TURD WORDS... OR...MY LIFE SINCE BEKI BONDAGE

200LBU endorses all the above. Run out and consume. Or read a book or smack a bitch or something constructive. Happy burfday AmeriKKKa! -- EL STINKO.

2006-06-14T18:11:00.000-07:00

MAX MILGRAM SEZ AND I OBEY...SIMPLE AS THAT...

Last night, Max Milgram (vocalist for the always ready-to-ruck Violent Students) flew into my window in the form of Beki Bondage (above) and told me to tell ‘the kids’ about this show. You’re pretty much gonna get to see three of the best bands rollin’ right now for FREE! Is it worth the trip? You betcha! Will I be there? Well..if I didn’t have to take care of my World Cup Fever…maybe…but I got a serious case. But don’t let that stop you from going…it’s gonna be a corker!

Magik Markers Lambsbread Violent Students June 18 2 PM free! Tequila Sunrise Records 525 W Girard Ave Philadelphia PA www.tequilasunriserecords.com

Also, for all you floppy haired Brooklynites, Pissed Jeans will be playing for FREE outside of OfficeOps this Saturday at 4 PM. As some of you know, these guys are the flakiest of the flakes, so a live show is a rare occasion. Go there and get your Sup Pop single auto-mo-graphed! Office Ops is at 57 Thames St. in Williamsburg.

‘You should really sit down and listen to ‘Tusk’ in it’s entirety one day, you pussy….

2006-06-13T21:48:00.001-07:00

THE DAY I FOUND OUT THERE WAS MORE TO THE INTERNET THAN PORN WAS THE FIRST DAY I TRUELY KNEW PAIN...

So sorry for the lapse in correspondence, but I actually have to pay bills and eat cheeseburgers and get through this awesome third season of ‘Black Books’ and take muscle relaxants and all such business. Sometimes, when I’m in the wonderfully foggy magic moment of a waking medicated dream, I imagine a lovely English country row full of green and mist. I walk stridently down the row unencumbered by normal, everyday shackles and seem to be….like….happy. It’s then I stumble upon a record shop (or ‘shoppe‘) that fits all the American stereotypes of quaint Englishness. Cobblestone tea coseys and all such bizz. It’s just then I usually awake to cries of ‘YOU A FAGGOT ASS NIGGA!!!’ coming through my bedroom window. It’s then I get up, eat a pot of buttered noodles and try to forget mostly everything, including the dream. Something tells me if the dream continued, I would walk into that record store to find either a too tight Uniform Choice shirt or a nice vinyl copy of Keith Cross and Peter Ross’ ‘Bored Civilians’ album. Either way, I’d be something of a winner. Some of you hardnosed Prog rockers might know Keith Cross as a member of T2, who put out that monster LP, ‘It’ll All Work Out In Boomtown’ on Decca in 1970. Some will know him as the guy who tried to screw your mother. Whatever. A couple of years after T2, Cross teamed up with Richard Thompson sidekick Peter Ross to do up the ‘Bored Civilians’ album. Those who like to take it free and easy in the countryside of their living room will take to this like ducks to duck sauce. English pastoral grooves that’ll please anyone whose ever dreamed of waking up at Headley Grange with a head fulla cheese and pills. Dig that cover of Fotheringay’s ‘Peace In The End’! And check out the line-up on here….Nick Lowe! Billy Rankin! Dee Murray! Jimmy Hastings! I know these names mean nothing to you noise helmos, but one day you’ll understand. And that gives me enough warm fuzzy to get through another painful fucking day…that and this CD re-issue of the above mentioned record. Si-Wan in Korea re-issued this awhile back…dunno if they still got it. If you wanna take the chance, go to their website - http://www.siwan.co.kr/. By the way, I could care less if you don’t understand one word of what I wrote. Get on the bus or get on your bike, fruit loop.

And now I’ll talk more shit…The summer disastour to end all summer disastours will start this weekend. Those infamous cheesecake warriors The Magik Markers will take off to the west coast with the new breed of real deal miscreants, Ohio’s Lambsbread. Here be the dates…be sure to be there and to bring lots of pills. Those kids can eat the hell outta some pills…

6-16 - Brooklyn, NY - Syrup Room 6-17 - New York, NY - Tonic 6-18 - Philadelphia, PA - TBA 6 -19 - Columbus, OH - Skylab Gallery 6-20 - Cleveland, OH - The Church 6-21 - Chicago, IL - Empty Bottle 6-22 - Iowa City, IA - Hall Mall 6-23 - Minneapolis, MN - TBA 6-24 - Minneapolis, MN - TBA 6-25 - Minneapolis, MN - TBA 6-26 - St. Louis, MO - Spooky Action Palace 6-27 - Kansas City, MO - Record Bar 6-28 - Oklahoma City, OK - TBA 6-29 - Denton, TX - Rubber Gloves 6-30 - Houston, TX - Proletariat 7-1 - San Antonio, TX - The Lounge
7-2 - Austin, TX - Emo’s 7-5 - Los Angeles, CA - The Smell 7-6 - San Francisco, CA - Hemlock Tavern 7-7 - Eureka, CA - Synapsis 7-8 - Portland, OR - Towne Lounge 7-9 - Seattle, WA - Gallery 1412

…And then those kids in Awesome Color are going on tour with those pros in Sonic Youth. Anyone else out there think that new SY disc looks like an homage to the Necros ‘Sex Drive’ single? Is it just me? Hello? Christ, I’m a loser…Anywhos, this Friday (6/16) will be the record release/tour farewell party for the A.C. (The CD on Ecstatic Peace comes out today) Brooklyn cavemen Mouthus will also be playing and some asshole will play some records before and after them. Some other nice person will play records for the rest of the night. Guess which one’s which and I’ll buy you a beer. I’ll be the asshole in the too tight Uniform Choice shirt. The show is at the Cakeshop, located at 152 Ludlow on the (formerly) Lower East Side.
I hope that’s enough. You don’t know how difficult it is to do this shit…and I’m not just saying that to impress you…

2006-06-11T19:55:00.000-07:00

I PROMISE IF YOU LET ME ACT LIKE AN IDIOT RIGHT THIS SECOND, I'LL WRITE SOMETHING TOMORROW...OR THE NEXT DAY...

All these gems come courtesy of Al Barkleys' awesome osxhc site, which you can find at -- http://osxhc.com/ This site also might contain an interview I did with Dan O'Mahoney when I was 16. Look and see...

2006-05-31T10:20:00.000-07:00

I AM NOT ABOVE SELF-PROMOTION...OR TOUCHING YOU FOR A REASONABLE FEE... Above -- Lloyd Barnes is like 'I think I need more speakers' and his boy is all like 'Yeah, you do!' So he goes out and gets more speakers and they blast Uriah Heep and The Viletones 'til the weed runs out. True story...

Hey there hockey pucks--
Dig my review of the Howlin’ Rain CD that appears in this weeks’ Village Voice. I figure some of you outside of the glorious New York area might wanna check it out, so here ya go.
http://www.villagevoice.com/music/0622,rettman,73355,22.html
Other than that, I got nothing for ya. Too busy with the fourth season of ‘Home Movies’ and transcribing hour upon hour of tape containing old men telling me how skeevy the Freezer Theatre was. Life is many a splintered thang. For now, how about a half-assed list of music I listen to a lot these days? That should hold ya…

Super Eight Loop - cassettes (Bloodlust!)
Career Suicide - 12” (Parts Unknown)
Voivod - ‘Nothingface’ (MCA)
Mind Eraser - ‘Cave’ (Painkiller)
HG/BXC - ‘II’ (Heavy Blossom)
Fleetwood Mac - ‘Rumours’ (Warner Bros)
Dirty B.S. - 7” (Slasher)
Various Artitsts -‘Firehouse Revolution - King Tubbys’ Production In The Digital Era 1985 - 89’ (Pressure Sounds)
James T. Pursey - ‘Revenge Is Not The Password’ (Turbo)
The Twinkle Brothers - ‘Dub Masscre Part 3’ (Twinkle)
Loefah - ‘Goat Stare/Root’ 12” (DMZ)
Vex’D - ‘Bombardment of Saturn’ 12” (Planet Mu)
Violent Minds - CD (Parts Unknown)
Various Artists - ‘Darker Than Blue -- Soul From Jamtown 1973-80’ (Blood and Fire)
Pat Boone - ‘Departure’ lp (Polydor)
Junior Delahaye - ‘Working Hard For The Rent Man’ 12” (Wackies)

Please remember, there’s no such thing as ‘guilty pleasures’. It’s all in your head…just like your ‘god’. Got it? Good….until next tymee….

2006-05-25T22:08:00.000-07:00

NEGATIVE APPROACH IN THE DIGITAL VIDEO FORMAT AND ELISA AMBROGIO SOUNDING LIKE COOKIE MONSTER? MAN, THAT SPIELBERG'S SOMETHING!
What can I tell you people? Life is a strange, salty wind these days. One day I call out sick to work just to stare at the walls and the next one some MTV employee is telling me he tried out for Amon Duul 2. It’s crazy I tell you…crazy as hell. When I wanna wind down from all the shiny balls and general confusion, I throw on the slippers and watch the new Negative Approach DVD entitled ‘Fair Warning Volume One’. I guess the thought of a Negative Approach DVD is sorta preposterous to some people. Sometimes I think I might be one of them. But once I get an eye fulla Detroit’s baddest roaring blast furnace style off the stage at Traxx, I’m gobblin’ the shit up like a kiddy boy. Four sets are included. The first is an early one where JB is sporting a homemade magic marker made Black Flag shirt. Witnessing that is worth the price of admission alone, Jack! The set is honestly kind of boring but you get to witness Brannon pull off the lamest stage dive known to man during their cover of ‘Chaos’. Splendid! The next is a set from Traxx in ‘82 that is pure bootboy insanity. ‘This one’s for fun…it’s by Blitz’. That’s all ya gotta know. Now if someone can pull an Oi! Division DVD outta their ass, I’ll prepare them a cob salad! Third set from Paychecks’ starts out pretty crappy where all you can see is some fly cat sporting half a pair of eye glasses. Then you get to see Larissa start the pit and all is forgiven. Last gem is Pappy B. rockin’ out with The Misfits..no shit! When I was twelve, I would of given you my dads’ nuts for this footage. Nowadays, I got these guys sending this stuff directly to my friggin’ house. I love both technology , the postal system and old dudes who’ll talk to you for hours on end about both Bookies’ and Nunzios’. Spot the number of times you see Andy Necros in this DVD and win a gravestone signed by Doyle and a years’ supply of bath salts. And now…here comes that pain again….You can order this from the Negative Approach myspace page --
http://www.myspace.com/negativeapproach A special ‘F-You’ to all those people that do their shopping on St. Marks Street…

And when I wanna wind down from THAT, I just throw on this new Axolotl 12” on Gypsy Sphinx entitled ‘Chemical Theatre‘. Both sides are custom made for late night stoning sessions where you can’t find your feet or your shoes. Terry Riley re-born as a Jersey pothead? Sounds fine by me! Makes me eagerly await some more of all this other shit Axo got comin’ out (A split with the Skaters on Catsup Plate, another full length jam on Psych-O-Path, etc) I think for now the only source for this disc is the Volcanic Tongue site over there in Scotland. There’s only 500 or so of these and I’d hate to think of you without it. http://www.volcanictongue.com/axolotl.html

Sorta feel like a douche sleeping on this Magik Markers 12” on Hospital for so long. I just figured someone would fling it outta van window at me someday, so why care? I should care a lot more I guess. Listening to this, I don’t feel I’m listening to the Markers, but an anonymous rip in the fabric beyond thickness. You say you gotta boy over there wrapped in the blackest of cloaks who once heard an MP3 of Negative FX? How quaint. I will cue this sucker up, play it down the phone at you and watch you curdled like the brain turd you are. ‘Inverted Belgium’ (the record I’m sorta talking about) is going fast since Pete Nolan is so damn hot, so you better act quick on this un too. http://hospitalproductions.com/ While you’re virtually ‘there’, compliment Hospital proprietor Dominick on his lips. He likes that…

Man, I gotta another Vex’D thing that I thought was pretty gnarled. This ‘Bombardment of Saturn’ 12” is a lesson in monotonous aggression that every tape wielder should be forced to listen to. It’s sort of a shame so many turn to smoke machines, phony Black Metal fans and bologna by the barrel when there’s something pretty vibrant and fucked with this Dubstep crap. There’s that Skream shit too that’s just as disorienting as spinning in place while reciting the lyrics to ‘Take ‘Em Up’. I can’t claim to be the most knowingest cat on this stuff, but as I consume, you will hear it about it. Lucky, lucky you… For now, just going to some of these spots might sort you out --
http://blackdownsoundboy.blogspot.com/
http://www.planet-mu.com/
http://www.rinsefm.com/ http://www.tempa.co.uk/
http://pitchforkmedia.com/features/themonthin/grime/04-12-06.shtml
http://www.drumzofthesouth.com/

OK…that’s all I got in me at this late hour. For anyone that would care, this Saturday morning at 9 AM EST, I will be doing the listener hour on WFMU. If you wanna hear abuncha stuff you don’t care about, tune in. I’d be glad ya did.
Who knows when there will be a next time here. Who knows what I’ll talk about. Who knows why I’ve been carrying around this chicken carcass in my saddle bag for so long. I know I like that Black Market Baby discography that came out last month. I know I like Coach McGuirk. That’s all I know right now. So, with that in mind, let me go and gargle bleach…

2006-05-09T23:09:00.000-07:00

IT'S AMAZING THE AMOUNT OF ASS SOMEONE CAN GET BY JUST READING WIKIPEDIA...OR.... HOW I LEARNED TO LOVE ASKINSTOO.................................... Above -- ...love letters in the sand between GD + TV...ain't that sweet....

Well…long time, no corny ass bloggin’. So sorry, but I have been embroiled in so many god damned things lately. Besides producing the upcoming Apple Hub Bub Gang 7” (entitled “Now That’s What I Call Bleech!”) I have been playing phone tag with Pappy Brannon as well as feverishly checking the Livewire message board for more talk of Chain of Strength and Free Jazz. Hot damn man! The kids are finally having their say! I have also been huffing much Freon and checking out tunes. “Rear Deliveries” boy himself hipped me to the sounds of the DJ duo outta London Town named Vex’D. Now, I know all this will be old hat to you hip young things with your Palmolive flavored drugs and big ole t-shirts, but this crapola really knocked me on my cute lil’ rear. It’s a knotted sound with jarring electro-shocks and jolts that sends sheer paranoia up the spine. And now I get to say the thing my parents used to say about The Meatmen….’HOW DO YOU KIDS DANCE TO THIS?’ Seriously, I could only see moving to this in a slow shuffle with your arms dangling like snakes. Or maybe I’m just not that good of a dancer…For those who don’t want to get into the murky depths of collecting all these 12” singles and crap, Planet-Mu did up most of their 12” jams on a two CD set named ’Degenerate’. It’s provided many a confusing night here at the cabin since it came through the doors. Perhaps it could do the same for you?

Another thing that has been fucking me up lately is these CDR’s from Ohio’s Lambsbread. The sets they laid down while on the east coast a few months ago were holy gnarled godhead. If I ever have children (Rickles forbid!) I’d like ‘em to be like this lot of hooligans. Messed up on cough syrup…spinning ‘The Age Of Quarrel’ and ‘Demolish NYC’ back to back…writing ’fag’ on a mattress and setting it in front our neighbors’ window…cute scamp stuff, y’know? Most of their stuff comes out on band member Zach’s Maim & Disfigured label. My favorite out of the lot is ’Water Damage’, which not only destroys, but might win the 200LBU ’Best Cover Art’ award hands down this year. Shrieks and shards of feedback, hot leads and a drummer whose not sure whether to be the dude from Infest or a deboned monkey. You make the call by getting in touch with Zach at -- mmnddsfgr@yahoo.com
Be on the lookout for a CD on Parts Unknown and a U.S. tour with The Magik Markers this summer. I can smell the burnt skin already…

There are grizzled dudes who sit in poker sheds all day and all night for years playing every crappy record in the world. And then there are college grads who are slumming it until they inherit their daddy’s shoelace factory. Consider Burnt Hills in the former. As history has proven time and time again with everyone from Magic Muscle to The Screamin’ Mee-Mees, (not to mention those apple cheeked/ mentioned above Magik Markers) there is a strange and tempting allure to letting it all go in a basement, especially when you’re smoking toenail clippings out of a soda can. A thirty plus minute jam that is constantly shifting into the red eye zone, this is the type of stuff that makes bunk greens THAT MUCH better. Edition of 99 or something fucking retarded like that. Chrissy at Fusetron has it. www.fusetronsound.com

At this time, I’d like to remove my pants and tell you that I’ve enjoyed many a good live show lately. The double whammy of The Believers and Awesome Color at the Cakeshop was a good drunken time for anyone who testifies in warm sludge and nice buns. The Believers opening with a scorching version of the Beach Boys’ Wild Honey’ and then moving into new material that’s the ultimate in sludgy love rock. Awesome Color provided the only kind of Psychedelic muscle you can get from smoking’ bowls, thrashing pools and jamming both the Shitlickers and Randy Holden. Y’all who are out of range of NYC could do yourselves a favor and check this unit out when they open for Sonic Youth in the southern area of our fair country. Go to Awesome Color’s myspace page and get the dates. If you expect me to give you a link, you can also expect to get herpes sometime soon. Then there was that hipster concentration camp show at the Syrup Room with Om/Endless Boogie,/Major Stars/Michael Hurley. This show was a fun time despite a sorta crappy p.a. and a constant foot in my groin. Major Stars brought the riffs and sex faces for all the yellow sweatered masses. Endless Boogie peaked and vallied through their set, but made up for it the next weekend at the Cakeshop with delivering one of the best set I’ve ever seen them do. Times New Viking were also on this bill and proved why they make so many blogboys hearts go atwitter. Twas a good night. I’m looking forward to more evenings of too much booze and not enough Blitz references. I hope you do the same.

NEXT TIME (IF YOU’RE LUCKY…) Talk of the brand new Negative Approach DVD? Some old interviews out of the 200LBU dustbin? Maybe a new interview? Maybe I get a life? Well, as Lil’ Stevie Winwood said himself, ’Who knows what tomorrow may bring?’
Now please drop dead…

2006-04-21T01:06:00.000-07:00

THE KIDS ARE STILL ANGRY? WHO WUDDA THUNK IT???
Every once in awhile, some young buckaroo will try to play me some new fangled Hardcore band they think I’ll like. ‘Dude, they sound just like (fill in the blank), you’ll love it!’ The situation usually ends up with me playing the recurring role of the jaded old fart. ‘Jesus Christ! This shit is so retro they might as well be playing stand up basses and wearing pompadours!‘ I drunkenly foam into the poor kids’ face who was nice enough to play the record for me. After that, I normally go on about how forced the anger is and how their guitar sound is too thin before passing out on their couch in an inebriated clump. The sad thing is, I wanna like the stuff. I wanna believe ‘the kids’ will actually have ’their say’ one day. I’d hate to think all my finger pointing and jumping on other young boys’ heads was all in vain, y’know. And so enters Toronto Canada’s Fucked Up. I heard their name thrown around here and there among the hip Hardcore kids I’ve been known to give candy to time and time again, but never really investigated them until one of them played me one of their many seven inchers. I was immediately floored. ‘This is some legitimately pissed off shit!’ I thought. I was already too late in the game to collect all the singles they released, but luckily they’ve all (more or less) been collected on the CD format by the Deranged label with the title of ‘Epics In Minutes’. One earful is testament to the fact that Hardcore is the Blues for the alienated Suburban youth. It might be the same three chords and the same lyrics about cops and confused anger, but it’s what’s behind it that makes it what it is. The band usually keeps everything at a mid-tempo, which reminds me of the more Oi! Inspired tracks by Negative Approach. One thing is for sure, if their track ‘Police’ doesn’t make you wanna punch some random pretty person in the face and/or explode (whichever comes first) you should have your Hardcore hall pass taken away, post haste. The end of the disc contains their demo and some tracks recorded live. Both batches of jams sound so dense and distorted, you’ll think it’s some new noise joint on the Hospital label or something. Strangely, next up for the band is a seven inch on Vice (?!?) and then a full length on Jade Tree (?!?) But don’t let that deter you. This is thee angry for both the young and the old.

Check out Fucked Up’s bloggo -- http://www.lookingforgold.blogspot.com/

Other than that, I’ve had a very weird obsession with the first side of Fleetwood Mac’s ‘Tango In The Night’ as of late. Anyone who can explain this event (‘cause god knows I can’t), please do so…

2006-04-17T19:21:00.000-07:00

GIMME THAT USED VHS COPY OF 'DUTCH'...THAT AUTOGRAPHED 8 X 10 OF DAVID FAUSTINO...AND WHAT THE HELL...THROW IN A COPY OF NANCY PRIDDY'S 'YOU'VE COME THIS WAY BEFORE'...

Like most loser boys who grew up in the late 80’s, I hadda major wood problem whenever that laugh parade known as ‘Married…With Children’ came on the T.V. set. Remember the episode when Kelly Bundy did that super hot dance routine with the janitor at the talent show? I’m sure you do. Well, I know I do at least (How sad) So many years and buckets of spuzz later, it seems sorta strange that my teen dream queens’ mother herself put out some sorta whacked out soft pop record in her time and prime. Who woulda thunk it? Who woulda cared? Well, I care! (How sad) Nancy Priddy not only mothered Veronica Corningstone, but she also released ‘You’ve Come This Way Before’ on the Dot label back in 1968 with the help of our old hero John Simon and the production credit of Phil Ramone (?!?). The recent CD re-ish on the always impeccable Rev-Ola label outta the U.K. is something that hasn’t left the CD player in quite some time and if you’ve ever clutched a glass unicorn, you’ll understand why. Sure, there’s plenty of brass flourishes and sunny day vibes all over the thing, but there’s certainly something screwy going on in the corners of this raisin fest. Check the doomy and creepy anti-war sentiment of ’Ebony Glass’ and tell me you can take a late night trip to the bathroom in the same state of mind ever again. The track ‘And Who Will You Be Then?’ also has the same sullen feel with plenty of weirdo moog blurts and bubbles adding to the disorientation. But yeah, there’s plenty of rainbow licking on here too. ’Mystic Lady’ is the number one track to throw on when you’re stoned out of your gourd and wanna get all lollipop on yourself. The thing I find funny is Pretty Purdie was the drummer on this session. I get a vision of him there, cig dangling from his lips, gettin’ slimy and down in the dirt for some of the funkier shit on here (like the title track, for instance) Then I picture him knee deep in disgust playing the happy white people beats on some of these tracks. Hey, it amuses me…I’m sorry. I’m not even gonna get into the track based on an Andrew Wyeth painting. It’s conceptual before Jon Anderson ever delivered a bottle of milk. And that’s a pretty heavy statement, no?
If this sounds like your bag of candy, go here --
http://www.cherryred.co.uk/revola/artists/nancypriddy.htm

For now, all I can tell you is if you live anywhere near this crud hole we call New York City, make sure to be down in the basement of The Cakeshop (152 Ludlow between Stanton and Rivington ) this Friday (April 21) when Midwest-cum-Bushwick psychsters Awesome Color share the stage with Northern Massachusetts’ sexiest sludge rockers, The Believers. It’ll be a love fest to end all love fests. I recommend donning ’protection’ prior to leaving the house. You have been warned…

2006-04-07T06:52:00.000-07:00

NEW YORK AND LONDON PAIR WITH EUNUCHS...EVERYBODY TALK ABOUT ROBIN SCOTT... Above -- Rettman looks into the window of the future and sees this image; still confused.

If memory serves me right, my seventh birthday party wasn’t the greatest of occasions. Sometime early in the proceedings, I was stung right in the face by a bee and some kid wet his pants just so he could go home early. Not only that, but a family member decided to play ‘deejay’ for the soirée. Plenty of dummy kids and their dummy parents were serenaded and marinated to the strains of such hits of the day as ‘Hey Saint Peter’ by Flash and the Pan and ‘Straight Lines’ by New Musik. And then of course, there was the incessant spinning of ‘Pop Musik’ by M. Whenever I hear that track, my brain soaks itself in bee juice and kiddy urine to remind me of what a shit start I had on this life. So, when I heard a few years ago that the ‘mastermind’ behind ‘Pop Musik’(Robin Scott) cut a record of acidic folk rock for the highly collectable and totally awesome Head label in the late 60’s, I was sorta puzzled. The record was always out of my price range when I would see it in Euro record lists. I’m not too sure of the exchange rate in Ratland, but I was pretty sure I didn’t have the equivalent of 2000 ganips in the bank. This situation really started to irritate me when I found out his backing band on this album was none other than Mighty Baby, a late 60’s U.K. hippy band held in the highest esteem by me and probably about three other beard wearing wanderers. Well, sometimes good things DO come to those who wait…and wait…and wait. The Sunbeam label just re-issued the thing (Entitled ’Woman From The Warm Grass’) on tinfoil and it lives up to all my bad toothed hippy dreams in some aspects. The tunes where Scott is backed by the Babe are spectacular stoned out grooves with MB guitarist Martin Stone practically bleeding his soul out. The English take on the west coast laid-backed-smoke-a-garbage-bag-full-of-weed sound will always prevail in my Anglo fixated mind, folks…sorry. The tracks where it’s just Robin and his acoustic can be affectively brooding, but nothing that’ll make you make up some lost love to weep about. I mean, why dole out the cash for this when you can buy the double ‘Early Years’ set of Al Stewart for a couple bucks at your local basement shoppe? His imitation of Dylan on a few tracks sometimes rivals Mike Hart, but that’s just sometimes. An interesting artifact? Sure. But let’s just say I’m glad I never gave Paul Major my first born for this. Then I would have to convince myself it was great.

Robin Scott - ‘Woman From The Warm Grass’ available through -- http://www.forcedexposure.com/

In the past week, when I’ve been ignoring paying bills or attention to the outside world, these are the things that have been entertaining me --
http://members.tripod.com/20thcpunkarchives/id64.htm
http://www.terminal-boredom.com/samoansfiles11.html
http://teengluesniffer.blogspot.com/ (dudes, you gotta update this bloggo more often! I need more!)
http://members.tripod.com/20thcpunkarchives/id65.htm
http://blow-up-doll.blogspot.com/ (the greatest blog ever? perhaps…)

…And finally, I give you the wit and wisdom of the man I consider both my soul mate and guiding light in life…
http://coack_mcguirk.tripod.com/COACHMCGUIRK/

There we go…just how I like it…short, sweet and to the point. Dig on it or go dig a grave…

2006-03-31T08:50:00.000-08:00

THE GHOST OF WALTER GLASER HAUNTS THE WINGS OF MY GHOST DAD...SEND HELP! Above -- Son of Earth trio causing mass destruction opening for Bulldoze, Marauder and Fury of V. Photo credit -- B.J. Puppies

Just when I was ready to don my beehive wig and let you know the real me via a lengthy discourse on Evie Sands, Peanut and The Goodees, this brand spankin’ new tape from Violent Students plopped it’s way through the mail slot and into the deck. Sounding like it was recorded on a ninth generation Realistic C-60, this cassette entitled ‘Bitchy Woman’ (get it? get it?) further extenuates The Studs non - existent curves and displays them for the solid block of grey, grey meat that they are. Someone yells at a black chick. Some dude throws up. It’s heavy, man. Dig it up via the Maim and Disfigure label. Mmnddsfgr@yahoo.com

But it hasn’t been all vomit and racial slurs around the boudoir lately. No surrey bobcat. This new CDR release by the Son of Earth trio entitled ’Erotic Empire’ has made sure of that. As some of you might know, the S.O.E. are capable of creating sounds that are barely there and only sonically readable by their pulse and presence. This new batch of jams kicks it up a few notches. We’re not talkin’ Montrose or anything, but the electro-squeals are abit more apparent and all the twinkling/tinkling sounds alittle more aggressive. Dare I also say it all sounds sorta…sexy? You know, the kinda sex you would have in a dank cave on a pile of scrap metal. And we all know that kinda relations is the best kind of relations. Why dontcha mosey on over to the Apostasy site and score one of these chumps, chump. http://www.apostasyrecordings.com/ P.S.-- If you reside in the Canadian area, be sure to check out the love sludge rawk of The Believers (Two out of three S.O.E. members in that unit, y’know) as they strangle their way through your town with Sunburned Hand of the Man. Dates? I got ‘em -- March 31 --Montreal/April 1 -- Montreal/ April 2 -- Ottawa

I don’t know where your asshole self resides, but from where I’m sittin’, Spring is coming on full and strong. As the windows open wider and the beer gets drunk earlier in the day, I need a soundtrack for this new lease on life. Luckily this copy of the Howlin’ Rain CD came in the post on the sunniest day thus far to make life just THAT MORE livable. Ethan from Comets on Fire and John Maloney of Sunburned Hand of the Man team up to produce the most legit beard swayin’ tracks to come out since The Suntanama decided to sequester themselves in the uptown lab. Shit…is that Ethan bustin’ out the Terry Reid impersonation that would make Chris Robinson hide in shame? Is Maloney bustin’ out some sweet Mick Fleetwood beats? Total good time jams for the gold tinted station wagon. And remember…don’t be afraid to Poco.

Sometimes beauty comes in strange places. The weirdest place I’ve experienced such exquisiteness has been on this new Religious Knives single (‘Blackbird’ b/w ‘Wax and Flesh’) The destruction of past experiences has been put aside for ghostly, head spinning tracks sure to wake you from dreaming destruction on all and everyone…but that could be just me. The A Side finds Maya’s voice soaring and soaring into the phony heavens while Mikey plucks, scrapes and drops various stringed thangs in a reenactment of Black Lodge rituals. Flipside’s got a fog of droning organs and delayed beats that bring to mind mountain tops I never really knew. Rad. Hey man, bliss is cool again!

And while we’re on both the bliss and Heavy Tapes tip…Mike gave me a whole satchel of new HT jams a few weeks ago. I must admit I’ve been listening to the second side of Fleetwood Mac’s ’Mirage’ too much to really delve into the whole batch, but the cassette that’s really stunned me thus far has been Family Underground’s ’Risen Under Altar Souls’. It seems every F.U. thing I’ve had the pleasure of hearing thus far has been a mystifying experience. Delay mania and slowly enveloping pulses might be old hat to some, but it’s the way they just throw things in out of fucking nowhere to break the tranquility that intrigues me. I think these kids might be honestly insane, and that’s why I love them. And its’ also why I love you…and you…but not you…you smell like whiskey and Demerol on a bad day. Yuck…

Do you remember when we used to hang out and we knew what it was all about? Of course you don’t! But for those who do, step right up to Mike Simonetti’s NYHC flyer fanzine. Man, I’ve known who Simo was before shit became shampoo. He was the ‘Supertouch’ kid! Always hanging from Mark Ryan’s sweatshirt hood begging to sell shirts for the band. Little did I know this kid would become the biggest tycoon in screamo-core. I shoulda been nicer to the dude. But man, he assembled this ‘zine of flyers from Hardcore shows in the late 80’s and it’s the total obvious trip down memory lane for this old, pathetic man I call me. I could go on and on about half these shows, but I don’t wanna bore you and I figure you all know what I’m gonna say by now. Good times…great oldies! I never got into that Project X show at the Lismar Lounge, tho’… Simo did. That kinda fries my fanny. Ugh.

As usual, most of these titles are available through the Fusetron site. Go there and give Chris all your money. He needs new binoculars. Next time, I’ll talk big shit and think I’m the best. Please…put me to the test…

2006-03-21T13:06:00.000-08:00

ONLY EIGHT POSTS IN AND RETTMAN ADMITS TO RUNNING ON FUMES BY DREDGING UP HIS PAST...FILM @ 11...

Once upon a time, I was an eager young man brimming with enthusiasm and hope. Wudda dummy thing to admit to. Somewhere around 1996 or so, I decided to totally ditch my britches on my Hardcore past and start this Psychedelic avant garde scum bucket type fanzine named The 200 Pound Underground. Wudda dummy move. A lot of people have shown interest in seeing the early issues from this time period, but I don’t gots. I guess as space/time/food permits, I will put up some of my ‘personal favorites’ from issues 1 through 3. I know this isn’t the same thing as holding the actual issue in your precious little hands. Tough crap. Accept loss forever and you’ll be the better man.

Somewhere in the Spring of 1997, Jim McCarthy (formerly of The Godz) came into a record store a relative works in to take some photographs. Somewhere between the photos being snapped and the car being started, Jim’s phone number was taken down and I met up with a day or so later. I don’t remember too many details from the interview other than he wanted to get back to his apartment to yell at the handyman for installing the wrong handles on his kitchen cabinets. As usual, I am a fountain of information.

Looking back, I see alotta cringe worthy things. A lack of punctuation, a fumbling lack of research (I really should of axed more questions about his solo LP, ‘Alien’) and a totally confusing earnestness. How the road lead from there to here, I’m totally perplexed by. If you can tell me how I went from this to that in fifty words or less, I will ride a winged serpent into your kitchen for Flag Day. No shit…

I include the original introduction from the ‘zine as proof…

In April of this year (1997) a blood relative of mine ran into Jim McCarthy at a local record shop. Luckily, Mr. McCarthy was cool enough to give out his phone number for a possible interview and the next thing I know I’m on the 2nd floor of some typical NYC deli having lunch and rapping with the man himself. I tell ya, sometimes it’s a sweet life. If you have yet to discover The Godz music, it’s imperative you do so immediately. Their sound reached beyone rock boundaries to scrape it’s fingernails on the walls of the great unknowable. They were soulful, chaotic, heartfelt and obnoxious all in one album. It was their music that moved Lester Bangs to scrawl down the immortal words ’Sometimes less is more’. Their first 3 releases (’Contact High’/’Godz 2’/’3rd Testament’) are the best place to start. For the less discerning types, might I also recommend Jim McCarthy’s solo LP, ’Alien’. It’s certainly not a free formed freak out, but it is an absolutely lovely little record (probably one of my all time fave ESP’s) rich with loose ’Basement Tapes’ like vibes and it’s complete with Jim doing his best Gary Brooker imiation. All the Godz records as well as ’Alien’ are available on CD via ESP XYZ and are most likely sitting in your local hipster records shop awaiting your consumption.

Jim McCarthy: So what do you want to know?
200LBU: I guess you all worked at a Sam Goody’s together, right?
JM: Three of us did. Me, Paul and Larry worked there. Jay Dillon we met through Larry. He (Jay) was originally a painter. He also sold marijuana to pay the rent so that’s the main reason we hooked up with him. (Laughter)
200LBU: So when did you originally get together to make music?
JM: I was living at Larry’s house. I had just got out of the hospital with a case of hepatitis and had broken up with the woman I was living with, so I had to move out of her place and live with Larry temporarily. It was a pretty depressing time for me.
200LBU: Oh really? You couldn’t tell that by the first record (obvious sarcasm followed by laughter)
JM: Yeah…so me, Larry and Paul were hanging out one afternoon, getting high and there were all these percussive instruments lying around and out of total frustration, I got up and starting shaking a tambourine or something like that, and that’s how it all started. We all started to get up and make noise like a bunch of maniacs, expressing our frustration. Paul played guitar, Larry didn’t play anything at the time and he was working at ESP as a sales manager and he said ’Oh Bernard Stollman would love this!’ and I thought he was crazy. Up until that point, I had been in bar bands playing top 40 covers. I actually cut a record with one of them, The Dick Watson Five. The record was called ’Baker Street’ and it was our take on a Rock ’N’ Roll Broadway show. It’s pretty obscure. It doesn’t even have our names on it. I left the band because I saw The Fugs play and I was inspired by them. The reality of their music caught me and I thought ’Why am I fucking around singing other peoples’ songs when I should be expressing my own feelings?’ So I left the Dick Watson Five with no plans at all, and when we did that thing the one afternoon, it felt right and I was ready for it. So we started writing songs and then we would improvise on them. We auditioned for Bernard Stollman over the telephone.
200LBU: Really?
JM: We just called him up and were like ’Hey Bernard, check this out’ and we played some weird shit over the phone to him and he loved it. He gave us 2 hours of studio time to record a single and we ended up recording the whole ’Contact High’ album in that session. We recorded all the songs from beginning to end. Exactly the way you hear it.
200LBU: Was there anyone else besides The Fugs that inspired you at the time?
JM: Mostly English bands like The Beatles and The Stones, but it was The Fugs that definitely turned my head around. We lived in the same area as them and the whole mood of the Lower East Side at the time was right for us starving artistic types. I was searching my soul for truth and found it in what I did.
200LBU: Did you have connection with the Velvet Underground?
JM: When I was in the hospital for hepatitis, I was in the same ward as Lou Reed. He had hepatitis as well. Mine was infectious, his was serum. This was before either of us had recorded our first albums. We used to get together to smoke cigarettes in this little room outside the ward. We would listen to the radio and I remember his favorite song at the time was ’Red Rubber Ball’ by The Cyrkle and mine was ’I Want You’ by Dylan. After he got out of the hospital, I was walking from the east side to the west side and we both walked towards one another but didn’t say anything. When the first Velvet Underground record came out, I realized who he was and I found out that he had ’Contact High’ and liked it, so we had this mutual appreciation society. He hung out once in awhile and we played with the Velvet Underground at some place out in Long Island called the Action House. It was a big concert with The Ronnettes, The Rascals, and a few others. They had 2 or 3 stages set up for the bands to play and it was a very weird scene. I have vague memories of it because I was pretty stoned. The last time I saw Lou was after the ’Transformer’ record came out and I ran into him at Max’s one night and we just talked.
200LBU: Did you guys have any connections with LaMonte Young?
JM: (Confused look) Who?
200LBU: The Theatre of Eternal Music?
JM: (Same confused look) No. We hung out at a club called The Scene. The Scene was a hang out place for models and musicians and people would just get up and jam. Hendrix used to hang out there.
200LBU: Did you feel any kinship with the more rock based ESP bands like Holy Modal Rounders or Pearls Before Swine?
JM: Pearls we didn’t really care for much, but Holy Modal Rounders were cool. The ESP offices were on Fifth Street and they had a room across the hall from the offices that they were supposed to set up as a studio, but it never happened.
200LBU: How steady of a live band were The Godz?
JM: We played in every club in the city at least once, because after the first time, no one wanted us back. We auditioned at a club called The Night Owl which is where The Lovin’ Spoonful got their break. I’ll never forget the afternoon we auditioned, because we went into ’White Cat Heat’ and the door opened and the bouncer who was standing outside opened the door and looked at us with such incredible disbelief. It was something you had to see. Needless to say, we didn’t get the gig. We played Folk City in it’s original location. Café Wha?, Café A Go Go. I remember the Café A Go Go gig because we were thrown out of there for smoking grass in the dressing room.
200LBU: Who were you getting to play with at these shows?
JM: Mostly ourselves. The biggest gig we ever got was through a college rep in North Carolina at Duke University. It was after the 2nd album came out, which was our most successful period. We drove down and they put us up in these rooms over the library for the weekend. We played the Civic Center in Durham and it was a great show. There was a pretty good local blues band that opened for us and they were baffled out of their minds at why we had top billing over them (laughter)
200LBU: So you were known outside of the NYC area at the time?
JM: Yeah, but we’re more popular now than we ever were then.
200LBU: Well that’s the way it always goes.
JM: Most of our biggest fans weren’t even born then.
200LBU: I wasn’t. Did you ever check out that Godz tribute record?
JM: On Lissy’s? Yeah, I like it.
200LBU: (Disapproving face)
JM: Why? What’s wrong with it?
200LBU: I’m just not too into those bands.
JM: I’m just amazed someone took the effort to replicate the spirit of our music. The thing that amuses me the most is the detail they remember, because we never thought of our music in that way. It just happened.
200LBU: I was looking at the recording dates on the back of the CD’s last night and it seemed like you guys were just kicking out the records one after another.
JM: The first one was just like getting out foot in the door. Fortunately, Bernard loved it and put it out immediately and it fit the feeling of the music because everything happened so spontaneously. Even in the music, things just happened and it felt right.
200LBU: I understand what you mean because The Godz were one of the first bands that helped me come to the realization that what I loved about music was the spirit and not the technicality of it. There’s things happening on those records that aren’t suppose to be happening and they’re creating these intense, heartfelt sounds.
JM: We certainly let mistakes work in our favor. Art is about taking things that occur and letting them go and seeing what happens, and that goes for any art form. After the first album, our egos really pumped up. Larry kept insisting we were the American version of the Beatles (Laughter) By the second record, we got some decent instruments. Jay got an electric keyboard, Paul got a set of drums, Larry had my bass and I got a nice electric guitar. We played around with those instruments and got a different feel for the 2nd record. It’s the most cohesive. I recently played the CD for someone and I have to say I enjoyed listening to it. I can’t say that about the first one though, I cringe when I hear that album.
200LBU: Really? I love that record. That was the first Godz record I ever heard. The next one I heard was the third one and I couldn’t believe it was the same band.
JM: By the third one, we weren’t really a band. Jay had dropped out.
200LBU: Didn’t he just disappear or something?
JM: For some reason on another, he didn’t like how things were working out so he just went back to doing what he was doing before the band.
200LBU: Selling pot?
JM: No, doing artwork. At the same time, I had just gotten married and my wife was from Philadelphia, so I moved there because my father promised me a job there. I lived there for 6 months and hated it, so I moved back to NYC and we recorded the 3rd album. That record wasn’t done as a group effort, it was separate elements of our own put together. I had a handful of songs and I just went in and did them. The same thing goes for Larry. There was only one full group session.
200LBU: Was that with the First Multitude?
JM: We just invited all our friends down to the studio one night. Most of them weren’t musicians and we just told them ‘Play’ and it rambled on. By the time the third record came out, we had broken up and a few years passed. I started to write a lot of my own stuff and I feel that was my most prolific point. I was trying to put a band together and it just wasn’t happening.
200LBU: What came first ‘Godzundheut’ or your solo album, ‘Alien’?
JM: I’m pretty sure ‘Godzundheit’ came first. Larry put that one together. I just joined in for a few songs. It wasn’t a Godz record, I’ll let you that. Bernard was begging me to do a solo record and I didn’t want to record for ESP anymore. I wanted to record with a label with a good budget. Finally, I gave in and did it. We did an acoustic session first and I didn’t like it, so I talked Bernard into getting some guys together. The band on ‘Alien’ was basically a pick up band. There was a few guys from the Left Banke on there (Steve Martin and Paul Thorton -- Baroque Pop editor’s note) We ran through the songs once and all the songs on the record were done in the 1st or 2nd take.
200LBU: Was ESP a well run label?
JM: Bernard was a musician’s lawyer and he had clients coming in complaining about record labels ripping them off, so Bernard thought ‘Hey, why don’t I rip them off?’ (Laughter) I’m sure he doesn’t see it that way. He played his role in providing a forum for us, though.
200LBU: Have you stayed in contact with him?
JM: Yes. He still thinks of himself as a great benefactor. I haven’t received a royalty statement from ESP Disk since the earl 70’s.
200LBU: You haven’t received royalties from the CD reissues?
JM: No, Bernard made a deal with XYZ in Germany to press up a shitload of CD’s for a shitload of money and no one has seen anything. I know they’re selling…
200LBU: It’s pretty ridiculous that he got as much money as you say considering most of those CD’s were mastered right off the vinyl.
JM: I agree. What happened was when Bernard closed up shop and moved up state he gave the master tapes away to the bands. Larry has the master tapes for some of the Godz records. I’ve got the master tape for ‘Alien’.
200LBU: Did you get to hang out with the Jazz musicians on ESP?
JM: Sure. I actually worked as a photographer for Bernard when he wanted file photos for his artists. I shot Marion Brown, Gato Barbieri, etc. Marion Brown and I used to get high on the roof of the ESP building.
200LBU: So there were no barriers between the Rock and Jazz people in ESP?
JM: Not at all. The Jazz people dug us because we were improvisational. There was a common ground. We used to run into Sun Ra in the East Village all the time. He was a trip!
200LBU: I can imagine. Was there anyone besides Lester Bangs who gave you guys a good write up? Maybe when you were around?
JM: Yeah, but Lester’s thing was the definitive one on The Godz. He really knew where we were coming from. I remember the day I saw that issue of Creem on the news stand. I was working at a clothing store in the East Village and I was out on my lunch break and pick up the new issue of Creem and it reads ‘Lester Bangs on The Godz’. So, I flip through and there’s this huge write up with pictures. Lester and I spoke a few times after that. He then moved to NYC and we got friendly. At the time he was putting together a band and he wanted me to join his band.
200LBU: Have you ever heard their record?
JM: No, how is it?
200LBU: He should of stuck to writing.
JM: I went to one of their rehearsals and I wasn’t impressed.
200LBU: So did everyone on ESP have to learn Esperanto?
JM: Oh man! Bernard wanted us to sing in Esperanto! One time Bernard brought us into his office and he had this old geezer in there and he spoke in this Eastern European accent and he tried to teach us Esperanto and we could’ve cared less.
200LBU: There was a study that said it would take over 200 years for Esperanto to progress over the entire planet, so it’s obvious Bernard really had a vision. (laughter)
JM: Oh yeah! It was this exclusive upper society thing to be into Esperanto. (I had to flip the tape at this point and somehow I ended up here…) All we did was try to express our feelings honestly. We wanted to show you didn’t have to be a musical student to express yourself. Jay Dillion was the one who wanted to get intellectual with The Godz. He wanted us to go to school and teach kids how to play music.
200LBU: What do you think of Larry’s new version of The Godz?
JM: I think it sucks. Larry is a scary guy.
200LBU: Mentally or physically?
JM: Both. Back in the old days, he was real scary. We were good friends and I can’t say that anymore. The last time I saw him I couldn’t stand to be in the same room as him.
200LBU: How long ago was this?
JM: Three or four years ago. It was when Bernard tried to get The Godz back together. Apparently he had some gigs lined up for us in Germany and Holland. We did one gig at the Bitter End. The music sounded good but it wasn’t The Godz. We tried to record some songs and it really sucked.
200LBU: I read a recent interview with Larry and he acted like the Godz never broke up.
JM: In his mind they never did. He owns the name, so he thinks The Godz owe him. Paul and I were supposed to do something for that Lizzy’s comp but Larry went and did his thing.
200LBU: That single is really bad.
JM: I agree. The thing that pisses me off is that’s one of my songs (‘Radar Eyes’)
200LBU: Do you still write music at all?
JM: I don’t. I still consider myself a musician and music still means an awful lot to me but I don’t have the need to express myself through music anymore. What happened was, after the solo record so many promises were made as far as support and nothing happened. I just got turned off by music because of the music business.
200LBU: Do you listen to any recent music?
JM: I like The Wallflowers a lot. My musical tastes varies, but most new music I can’t get into at all. There’s not enough substance to grab on to. The most disappointing area is R&B. I remember real R&B.
200LBU: It’s all about convenience. They just throw labels on thins even though it’s hardly what the label conveys.
JM: I mean, I’m talking Al Green, Wilson Pickett, Otis Redding. THOSE are R&B singers. You hear them and it’s pure emotion. Even Aretha Franklin, one of my favorite singers, is singing shit these days! I’m sure there are bands just as good as them. I just don’t keep up with them.
200LBU: Well, there’s plenty of bands keeping up the tradition of The Godz. I guess my main problem with that Godz tribute record is most of those bands are well known indie rock bands. The bands who are really sharing something with what you guys did press up their records in editions of 500 and sell them to their friends.
JM: My basic interest is in roots music. Whether its roots rock, root blues, roots folk. I like all music as long as it’s got an element of soul to it. It doesn’t matter the category, it’s the emotion and that’s what I miss in music today. I go down to New Orleans every year for the Heritage Jazz Festival and to me it’s like Christmas. There’s this tall stage set up on a racetrack and all day long there’s music going on all the stages. You’ll see these old guys who probably have a job as a dishwasher every other day of the year, but that day they’re loved and they’ve been doing this for 40 years. They do it for the love of it, not for the money or the girls. It makes you feel good and others feel good.
200LBU: Well, that’s what it’s all about.
JM: Absolutely, man.
200LBU: It’s one of those things where you can’t really put it into words, it’s just about the feeling.
JM: Well, you know it when you feel it. I just bought the Al Green anthology last week and I’ve been a fan of his since the beginning. I put this CD on and his music still brings chills to my body and it’s so REAL and that’s what it’s all about.
200LBU: Weren’t the Godz actually pretty good friends with Procul Harem?
JM: I still am. The other guys weren’t so much as I was. I bought the 1st Procul Harem record at the same time I bought the 1st David Bowie and the 1st Velvet Underground album. I listened to that 1st Procul Harem records everyday regularly. In ‘68, I was working at the Sam Goody on 49th Street and someone said Procul Harem was staying at the hotel across the street. I went over there and picked up the house phone and asked for Gary Broker and he answered! So I went upstairs and introduced myself and he knew who The Godz were! The band had a photo session a year before at Michael Sullivan’s studio and he played a Godz record while he photographed them. Gary and I hit off as well as B.J. Oswald, one of, if not THEE greatest rock drummers ever. A real strong friendship.
200LBU: My last questions is an obvious one. I guess drugs played an important role in The Godz’ music.
JM: Yeah. We smoked grass and hash. We tripped on acid. Did speed occasionally.
200LBU: From what I’ve read about NYC in the late 60’s, speed was pretty much the drug of choice.
JM: We didn’t do it that much. We didn’t do acid that much either. Maybe like once a month.
200LBU: Oh, once a month, that’s it? What was that? Doctors’ orders?
JM: It was a required thing at the time.
200LBU: It’s certainly required thing while listening to it.
JM: It helps!200LBU: I know the first time I heard The Godz, I was incredibly stoned.
JM: Well, if it’s any consolation to you, Paul still smokes joints like they’re cigarettes.
200LBU: Yeah…that makes me happy.

---AND IF THE LAZINESS AIN'T APPARENT ENOUGH---

Sometime next time, we'll chat about the new Violent Students cassette on Main + Disfigured and Simos' flyer 'zine and the new Loosers thing on Our Mouth and other stuffs. Until then...don't bother me....I'm mulling...

2006-03-12T01:55:00.000-08:00

...THE HOBBIT THAT TURNS MY CRANKCASE IS DEPRESSED AND NEEDS THERAPY... ...AND I WON'T EVEN TELL YOU ABOUT MY UNICORN AIR FRESHENER...

Sometimes here at the ole 200LBU Headquarters, we like to let down all five of our hairs, light some aroma therapy candles and put the Tampere S.S. seven inchers aside for a day. When a mood such as this hits us, we bust into a special pile of wax and tracks that takes us away like lysergic Calgon. Always sitting high and mighty in said stack is the re-issue of the 1968 classic by Chrysalis entitled ‘Definition’. Chrysalis were a gaggle of New York freaks who managed to sound like the finer things coming from England and the west coast of their own country while still maintaining their east coast peculiarisms. The opening ’What Will Become of the Morning?’ is like early Canterbury moves interpreted by Curt Boetcher or something. Stuff that’ll make ya wanna tip toe through the long grass with the finest hooker you can find on your dead end street. ’April Grove’ is total first LP Fairport Convention, even if this Nancy Nairn chick ain’t no Judy Dyble, or even Judi Dench for that matter. Parts of this might get too hippy vaudeville for some of your asses, but anyone who doesn’t thrill to the thought of a draft dodger with a garder belt on his arm can go suck a ski cap. It sorta fries my cheese that there’s some beyond middle-aged-pony-tailed-doobage addict who probably has an original of this rotting away in his collection due to it’s inclusion of Spider Barbour. He should just give the bastard to me. I need it more.

2006-03-07T20:59:00.000-08:00

FACT # 827 -- PICTURES OF CHICKS WITH CATS PUTS ASSES IN THE SEATS...
…IT’S EVIE’S WORLD….WE JUST LIVE IN IT…

Sadly, I have a rotation of songs that run through my head when I’m doing my daily grind for the money. In the past few weeks, it’s included everything from ‘I Can Hear The Grass Grow’ by The Move to ‘Bats Ain’t For Baseball’ by Lockjaw. What can I say? I truly suck. But for the past few weeks, there’s a certain tune I can’t get outta my friggin’ skull that‘s been leavin‘ both Roy and The Slayer Hippy in the dust. ‘Hey Girls? /How’s it goin’?/ How’s your week been so far?/ I gotta the gift that keeps on givin’/It’s called ELECTRIC GUITAR!!!’. A howl of inept wailing bleeds through the words before the track dilapidates on top of it’s self and the creator blurts out ‘I Gotta Get Some Gum’. It’s just then I hit ‘pause’ in my head and think I’m actually sorta happy. This moment of half way decentness is brought to me by the Home Blitz 7” single recently released by the home blitzer himself, Daniel DiMaggio. This little hairball of enthusiasm has produced a three song single that jumps all over itself in jumbled guitars, happy-go-boom primitive pop moves and a snotty vocal delivery that would choke up even the blondest of giants. I’ll list Daniel’s e-mail at the end of this report. Do yourself the biggest flavor you can and snag it while you still can.

On Tuesday nights, my roommate is usually scratching out lotto tickets at the bodega for hours on end. I knew this would be the perfect time to bust out this new CD by Colossal Yes and don my mint tinted ascot while eating funyuns. Once I heard the creaky door slam and his footsteps drift out into the dark urban night, I started blasting the disc at a thunderous roar and wept into my deep fried treats at all those melancholy pop jams. I wept so hard that I was awoken a few hours later by my roommate shaking me conscious on the couch. He questioned what the hell the deal was with the ascot. I muttered something about a salute to our fallen hero, Don Knotts. He actually bought it and I went to bed wiping much sweat from my brow. Another dodged embarrassing moment. The story of my life. But that moment hasn’t stopped me from listening to this thing for many moments in the past few days. Do any one of you have a deep buried copy of the June and The Exit Wounds CD somewhere in your caverns? You damn sissy. Join the club! Anyone whose not afraid to enjoy a nice brass arrangement, come on over to the crib for a listen. You can wear your blazer if you want as well. I DON’T JUDGE.

Although it might cost ya the price of your weekly beer budget, you really can’t go wrong picking up this new Loosers lp on Qbico entitled 'Bully Bones’. Where previous releases find these slick devils slipping into too much of a ‘song’ mode, this one is pure smoke and abstraction from the get go. Looped strings, maracas madness and hilltop vocal drones that’ll send many a beard a swayin’. Light your windows to this on a good night and lemme know how it feels...

I’m sure most of you out there are collecting all our sheckles in big burlap sacks to spend at next week’s No Fun Fest. You’ll fly from god knows where to spend all your hard earned dime on cassettes wrapped in boogers and tinfoil while making sure your ski cap looks ‘just right’. God bless ya, you crazy bastard. While taking in the trade show, make sure you find ole Beardy Bernstein to secure volume two in the continuing Hive Mind/Workbench split LP series being done up by Heavy Tapes and Chrondritic Sound. The Hive Mind side is the pure wormhole sound we expect in our creamiest of nightmares. Workbench’s half is more of a throbbing flicker that fogs the mind and drains the pockets. Dig that fancy cover!

Before you go off to some gross porn site, check out some of the finest non-smutty pickins on the ole inner web. My hero in free dudedom, Eddie Flowers, has got the Slippy Town News site up and running and it’s a joy to read. Sights and sound are considered with great aplomb while none other than Brucie Cole shows you his live Stooges photos from 1974. Do you know how lucky you are? Sometimes I wonder… The proprietor of Philadelphia Record Exchange used to shoe me and my pals away when we would paw through issues of Siltbreeze fanzine in his store. I guess he thought it wasn’t cool for fifteen year olds to see picture of naked fat women in his establishment. Well, he can’t say nothing now that the ole Siltblog is there on the cyber thing for people of all ages to see. No sick nudie pix as of yet, but there’s talk of sounds no one in their right mind has ever heard of, which means you’ll be right at home, freak. While you're there, go to the Silt site and load up on Sunshine Superscum singles. Tom’ll be glad ya did.

Home Blitz jam available at homeblitz@gmail.com Colossal Yes available through Midheaven. Loosers and Workbench/Hive Mind things from Fusetron. http://www.slippytown.com/ for your Flower needs. http://siltblog.blogspot.com/ for all your short ordering needs. Gorge on it, skinny.

And what kinda of collection of crappy blurbs would this be without a You Tube link? Bust out your braces for this one, ya yarn boys…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lxEY4gMEujQ&search=cockney%20rejects

2006-02-24T07:29:00.000-08:00

FACT #909-- DUDES WHO LOOK LIKE THOMAS DOLBY DO NOT LISTEN TO BLITZ... If you would like proof, just take a peep at this -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OD9yl_V3Azw

Anyone who is no-one knows Paul Major is the real deal. An encyclopedia on barely existent Psych and Hard Rock jams from the 60’s and 70’s…the guitarist for the constantly delivering Endless Boogie…record dealer extraordinaire…provider of whacky records to David Letterman (whuh?) The man is an interview waiting to happen, more or less. So when some certain someone told me of a certain moment in time when Paul guest deejayed on WNYU back in the early 90’s, you know I had to hear it. And hear it I did! The dupe provided to me hasn’t left the deck in days. Paul expounds on tales from the marshmallow dimension (through tons of echo of course) while playing obscure 60’s/70’s jams by Morgen, Curtis Knight, Spare Change, John Scoggins, Arthur Lee Harper, etc. It’s a true late night boiner. Hopefully one day you’ll turn on to it. Don’t look at me though…I don’t believe in sharing…and I smoke and I don’t vote….SO THERE!

Jakob Olausson is a Swedish cat who usually records under the moniker of the Joshua Jugband Five. From what I remember of the CDR released on the Slippytown label a few years back, the JJ5 stuff was the kinda fuzzed out hippy dementia that would drive both punkers and grandmas out of the room in disgust. This ’solo’ LP of his on DeStijl, ’Moonlight Farm’ isn’t too disturbing at all. In fact, it’s downright beautiful. Jakob’s lonerisms sound legit and the way he shoots them across the night sky is something that’ll please anyone who was knocked out by Benny Chasny’s first vinyl etchings or St.Mikael’s first one. It’s the kinda record that fetches the slippers and the pipe and lets you know the day is over…even when it’s 10 a.m. Just my style.

The fact Jessica Rylan releases records, tapes, CDR’s, commemorative plates, etc. is one more reason for getting up off your gray mat in the morning. Heavy Tapes just did up a new cassette by her entitled ‘Flight To The Ivory Tower/Total Confusion Recreation’ and it’s yet another gem in her long line of ‘em. Jessica’s willingness to let the sounds broadcasting from her electronics just lay and flail and collapse and do whatever they wanna do is pretty refreshing in this day and age of the tight fisted noisenik. But you don’t have to listen to me if you don’t want to. I mean…look at me! I’m covered in cat hair!!! Gross!!!

Most of the above is available at the Fusetron website. Dig it...

O.K….that’s more than enough for now. Next time around there’ll be craptastic writing on Mouthus, Hive Mind, Workbench, The Loosers, Home Blitz and maybe all that other stuff I always mention in the other entries that I never get around to. We’ll see…
P.S. -- FANX! To Disco Danny D. for the Blitz linkage.

2006-02-19T20:28:00.000-08:00

HOW I EVER BECAME THE REVEREND NORB FOR CRAP ROCK, I'LL NEVER KNOW... I had read Eva Salens' blog (A.K.A. Inca Ore) before hearing any of her music. Her site was crammed with narcotic fueled ramblings concerning living on a pot farm, wearing ill fitting clothing and tap dancing for Jackie O-Motherfather. As you can imagine, I was highly intrigued. I heard that a CDR of her actual sounds was available on the Jyrk imprint, but I never got around to picking it up. . . What can I say? I'm a sloth. So you better believe I was stoked when I found out the Weird Forest label had re-issued the thing on vinyl in a stunning silk-screened cover. Almost makes it worth being a slow moving slug like me. All you get here is Eva's voice layered and stretched and phased into a weightless heaven where snowmen melt slowly and surely. Sometimes I wish this is what it sounded like when I hummed to myself. Sometimes I wish I could broadcast this through a crappy p.a. system in a church basement. And then sometimes I wish I had a REALLY GOOD sandwhich. Unfortunatly, wishes sometimes never come true. Maybe if you pick this album up, you'll imagine a wish came true and you'll be happy for a second. Who knows...

I recall having a phone conversation with John Olson back in the early 00’s where he told me the original guitarist for Universal Indians had serious ‘Neil Young damage’. Some of those U.I. rock jams had some serious slo-mo action going on, but I never really understood what he was on about until I scored this newly released LP of old U.I recordings entitled 'Monster Approach' on the Killer Tree label. The first jam, ‘Place In The Sun’, is a full-on, jacked up rocker, but from there the record rides into a totally nuclear sunset. Ever have a dream about a Zuma Beach tidal wave hitting Detroit to clean Pappy Brannon’s soul clean? If so, you need this disc. You poor, poor soul...

Word from a bird tells me Philadelphia’s Violent Students has just released their CD on the estimable Parts Unknown label outta the Jersey Shore. I’ve had a copy of this thing for awhile now and I gotta tell you it’s the most heinous thing you could buy this year, thus far. No one else has the nerve to turn the riff from ‘Seekers Of The Truth’ into a fifteen minute throb rock opus like these guys do. All the heartless insanity you expect from your pastey noise icons is right here, no doubt about it. Pick it up now before some jerk ass on some other website tells you how he ‘discovered’ them. Those kinda people…they’re not good people. Linkage to the Parts Unknown label below…

In the ‘get now while the getting’s good’ department…Be sure to trek over to the Midheaven site to score yourself a re-issue of Gauze’s classic debut LP from 1984, lovingly entitled ‘Fuckheads’. This record is the Japanese equivalent to ‘Damaged’ or ‘Tied Down’ in sheer, vicious invention. You need it. I tell ya… the more I write this crap, the more I feel like Mike Tyson. Christ...

I know this disc is old news to most people who wear velvet on a daily basis, but the Akarma label has just done up a hockey puck thick vinyl re-issue of the Brit Prog Rock classic ‘It’ll All Work Out In Boomtown’ by T2. Although this disc fills all the tills as far as being overblown and highly theatric, it kinda bowled me over at how musically ambitious it was. Tons of brass makes the tracks abit more lively than the usual Dungeons and Dragons affair and the trios’ willingness to let loose abit (Check the side lone track ‘Morning’) makes me think these guys wouldn’t of suckled at Greg Lake’s twelve string if he ordered them to. That’s cool. The guitarist for T2, Keith Cross, put out an excellent album a few years after this with a dude named Peter Ross. It’s entitled ‘Bored Civilians’ and it’s on Decca. If you ever find a copy, you should send it to me…got it?

Oh yeah, for those who care, 200LBU#5 is now available. It contains too many reviews and a history lesson on Finish Kiddie Core legends, The Demars. E-mail me at trettman@hotmail.com and we’ll go from there.

If you actually care about any of this stuff, get with these people and they’ll help you out--
http://www.fusetronsound.com/
http://www.partsunknownrecords.com/
http://www.midheaven.com/
http://www.forcedexposure.com/
Next time around will I dare and try to write about this Vex’D double CD? Or Cher’s ‘3614 Jackson Highway’ or the latest Jakob Olausson LP on DeStijl? Will I go on for virtual pages about Evie Sands? While you ponder these and many other questions, check out my newest hero -- http://www.dylanmoranrules.com/
Until Then…

2006-02-05T20:12:00.000-08:00

FIND AS MANY HARDCORE CELEBRITIES AS I DID AND WIN YOURSELF A SHINY NEW PONY!

http://www.youtube.com/w/Fear-Live-On-SNL?v=o7Xtpf-ZKXU&search=fear%20SNL

So far I see Sab, Bloodclot, Harley, Tesco and so much more! Oh tell me, oh tell me who you see!

Uh...yeah...

BLUES CONTROL/AWESOME KU-LAIR/PENGO/FAITH HEALERS (?)/STINKY TURNER TELLS ALL!...

So you think you've seen and heard it all as far as overblown abstract heavy rock goes? What? You didn't say that? Oh sorry...it's these new glasses. Make everything sound so blurry. But Blues Control do seem to be on to something in the (uh...um...) 'genre' mentioned above. Sorry to hear you bought that thirty dollar Tetuzi Akiyama album when you could of been blown away by B.C.s' robo boogie for mere pennies via this cassette. Go here and they'll sort you out: --//whitetapes.8m.com/tapes.html

When a fellow came to my New Years' Eve party and was eyeing up my Four Skins collection, I knew I was onto someone who was either going to be a pal or an enemy. Luckily, he just became an acquaintance who sort of remembers my name and he's in a band named Awesome Color. A.C. don't play no bootboy anthems, but they do pull out a pretty muscular brew of Detroit sound/rock action for the pretty people. I am by no stretch of the imagination 'pretty', but I still am allowed to enjoy the sounds and stand there looking like my cat just died while everyone gyrates and such around me. Yah know...Sometimes those pretty people can be SO nice. The only thing I can do is direct you to their 'myspace' page (What the hell is that?) I guess you can catch up with them there and you can talk about how great that bowl of Grape Nuts you ate today was. Once again...'ugh' --http://www.myspace.com/awesomecolor

Rochester's Pengo have carved out a truly unique spot for themselves in the past few years. Live, they can sometimes come off like some manic tribal ritual that would of taken place on the Spahn Ranch right before a creepy crawl. Their recorded output can be a confusing though fulfilling stew of found audio, grey noise clouds and ham fisted guitar wrenching that would send any strong blooded struggler for the Geritol in no time. This double disc set, entitled 'Alchemy and Bullshit', is made up of various live recordings done around their hometown a few years back and it showcases the various forms of dementia this unit is capable of. The first disc is a perfect soundtrack for a late night wander through old newspaper clippings and various forms of mildew found behind the toilet. The boys attempt to cover Blue Oyster Cult, Thin Lizzy, Negative Approach and Organization only to end up sounding like pygmies dropped off in the middle of Sunflower City with only a bamboo shoot and a paper thin guitar pick to fend with. The gem of this disc is the closing 'Official Genius' which meanders through much fog and steam to relieve itself in a way only Captain Beefheart or Ansley Dunbar would find fitting. How quaint. The second disc is made up of shorter pieces of subtle mud slapped guitar crap that'll have ya heavin' in no time. Swap a copy of your Hunger Artist 12" to the fine folks at the Carbon label and maybe they'll throw ya one -- http://www.carbonrecords.com/

When I think of Th' Faith Healers, my mind reels back to a condominium in Newtown, Pennsylvania where a late teen/early twenties buddy lived with his mother. Their debut LP would spin ad infinitum there while bong loads of righteous boo and other narcotics were stupidly consumed. Their cover of 'Mother Sky' made me pester my brother to finally let me borrow all those Can records he'd been going on about for years and I generally consider the disc to be one of the many eye openers in this pointless musical journey I've been on my whole life. Have I listened to it in the past ten years? Of course not. To be honest, I think I might have sold it off years ago. So, hearing this new collection of John Peel sessions (on the BaDaBing! label) at this point in my life has been a strange experience. Lots of cringes and half smiles have been made while listening to it, but that could just be me. There's no doubt Th' Faith Healers were head and shoulders above the many limey contestants in the My Bloody Valentine sweepstakes of the early nineties. Where many were merely trying to collapse under the weight of their pop sensibilities and a junked up surging guitar sound, these chumps still sound like they were not in control of the sounds they were creating. The beefy swirl of Tom Cullinan's guitar sound still packs a wallop as it manages to deteriorate the surroundings of everything surrounding it. And the heave on tracks like 'Get The Fuck Out Of My face' and 'Ooh La La' keep such a tight clench on the U.K. Punk sound of the early eighties, you'd think this shit might of came out on the Riot City or No Future label. Nostalgia is a concoction I never want to taste, so I'm in total denial to the reasoning that this might be the basis on why I enjoy this disc so much. I mean, shit...the last thing I want to re-live is smoking codeine and peeing my pants. Let's just say there's still room in my dark little heart for this and 'Loveless' and 'Dirty' and 'Shoulder Voices' for the mere reason they merged the dissident noise I loved as a young punker with the pop hooks that we all long for in our deepest dreams, no matter how many C.O.C. records we ever owned. End of sermon. Pay as you leave. http://www.badabingrecords.com/

WHY LISTEN TO SOMETHING THAT YOU'RE NOT?--Sometime soon there will be more pointless musing on Universal Indians, Mouthus, Inca Ore, The Allied, Violent Students, Attak, Douglas Bregger, Can't, and more in-depth analysis on the meaning behind many of the Cockney Rejects lyrics...

2006-02-03T11:58:00.000-08:00

FIRST, WE'LL TALK ABOUT THIS RAD ASS JOHNNY WASTE INTERVIEW AND THEN WE'LL TALK ABOUT TWINKLE...

Yo dudes/dudettes--

Check out this interview conducted circa NOW with Johnny Waste, guitarist for that almighty first string NYHC band, Urban Waste. Coulda done with more stories of sketchy NYHC street life circa '82, but the piece is interesting/informative/entertaining nonetheless. Catch it here--http://bareboneshardcore.blogspot.com/

And since I'm in the mood to smash skulls and skank hard, why don't we talk about some female British singers from the mid sixties? Twinkle strutted into the British music scene in 1964 with the rather creepy but beautiful self penned tune, 'Terry', an homage to a boyfriend who died in a tragic 'motor bike' accident. Yeah...a guy named Terry being a tough British biker...I can see that. Anywhos, the song went to number four on the U.K. charts and primed Twinkle to release a string of singles in England that didn't really match the success of 'Terry', but still made grown men want to don beehive wigs and wear white lipstick. Some of you might know her track 'Golden Lights', which was covered by The Smiths and was the B-Side to the 12" single of 'Ask'. Yes, I knew that off the top of my head. You can stop reading at this point if you want. I understand. That label I love so much, RPM, did up a CD a few years back compiling all of Twinkle's singles entitled 'Golden Lights' and it's quite something, let me tell you. The dichotomy in the material is somewhat disorienting. Tracks like 'Tommy', 'Poor Old Johnny' and 'I Need Your Hand In Mine' stick in the 'Cor blimey! Me boyfriend done left me and/or died' vein and might have you droppin' a salty tear for ole Twinkie. But then there's 'Ain't Nobody Home But Me', 'Take Me To The Dance' and 'What Am I Doing Here With You?', tracks that make you long for some adolescent innocence you never had. But I think I see a theme here...Twinkle meets boy at dance...or invites him over to her parents' barren house...or meets him in some strange town and has a fling...AND THEN HE DIES! Remind me never to go over her house for tea and blood pudding. But man, if you track this down (plenty of 'em over at Overstock.com) it'll have ya floatin' on clouds. More so than that live Warzone set with Tommy Rat singing? Well...I never said that...

2006-02-02T20:33:00.000-08:00

Alotta people axe me (they axe me) ‘Hey goober, when’s that next paper issue of 200LBU coming out?’ Soon after delivering a sound blow to their windpipe, I understand they have a point. The last one came out over a year ago, and the one before that came out…well…let’s not get into that. I guess I really have no reason for not putting one out except that I find it painfully hard to paste words to a page and take them to be printed. It’s much easier to let the kind people at Blastitude or whatever simply throw them up on the internet and be done with it. But once in awhile, I do get that yearning to deliver something that is all my own. For the times when I do get that pang, I decided to do this dummy blog thing.
I hope you ‘enjoy’--TR

HERE’S A FEW REVIEWS THAT ARE/WERE SUPPOSED TO BE IN 200LBU#5. FOR NOW, THEY’RE HERE…GET USED TO IT

VEGAS MARTYRS - ’Choking Doberman’ (Kitty Play, 7”)
When ole apple pie face told me of his new ’Punk’ band, I thought it was real cute. The cassette they released was a decent blast of soot, but I still wasn’t on board. But then I saw them live (about as violent a band I’m gonna get in this time of geezerdom) and heard this 7” and I’m a total card carrying member Pops. Both sides sound like some kinda Psychedelic black metal wet dream scrapped right outta Donna Rettman’s pink sweatpants. The way the sucker looks drives it right there into legendville as well.
Between this single and the more rockin’ parts of ’Black Vase’, I could swear Dominick (the Mike Judge of noise) is dipping into Richard Dunn’s weed stash, but I don’t think that Dom’s edge will go dull EVER.

MAJOR CONFLICT - ‘Sounds Like 1983’ (Mad At The World, CD)
I recall at least one long lost high school collector buddy of mine scoring the Major Conflict 7” back in the day. I remember being real excited to hear it since it was something of a missing link in our early NYHC record collecting, but the actual sound of the thing left us cold. Both time and awesome liner notes from Wendy Guillotine hasn’t changed my mind. The actual tracks from the 7”still sound pretty lackluster considering who’s involved (ex-Urban Waste dude!) and the unreleased tracks come off too anthem like and mid-tempo for me to care. Brings to mind the L.A. Youth Brigade…not a good memory, really. There are some flashes of sweaty thrashing mania recorded at A7 that are pretty cool to hear, but overall, this disc just makes me anxious to hear this label’s upcoming Misguided discography CD. And if that’s doesn’t say something to ya, forget I said anything at all.
(www.madattheworldrecords.com)

ROGER NICHOLS AND THE SMALL CIRCLE OF FRIENDS (Rev-Ola, CD)
I’ve been getting alotta sideways comments these days about my recent obsession with all sounds lush and foppy. Having hipsters over for a meet ‘n’ greet and blaring something like this certainly separates the guff from the tuff in a heartbeat and splits a room apart in the same way your fave dirt quaffed noiser would at a martini shindig. Is this the new frontier? Now that I’ve hit upon people who don’t bellyache over hearing Rutto and David Stoughton in the same evening. Is this the stuff that will drive them ’round the bend? Hmm…gimme a few nights and a few Steel Reserves and I’ll give you one dandy of an essay on the subject. For now, I’d rather skip through the daises (I.e.--crushed 40 bottles) to this gemstone and forget my dead end existence. Roger Nichols wrote alotta tunes with that infamous dwarf Paul Williams (check the Holy Mackerel review) plus he even wrote ‘We Only Just Begun’ for The Carpenters. If that don’t tell you of the cat’s magnitude, go suck several eggs. But before Karen’s fingers started to smell of rotten beef stew, Rog did up this sunshine pop masterpiece. Is this disc goofy? Oh, you betcha! Even the cornball Beatles covers make me grit my teeth, and I’ve been known to play ‘Kites Are Fun’ on a loop while fondling my crystal unicorn collection. But their version of ‘Snow Queen’ is like listening to angels sing while eating cookies and getting a hand job. Pure bliss. Rev-Ola has done it again in the re-issue department. Between this and the Chrysalis re-issue, I just might plotz. And you’d like that, wouldn’t you?

FRICARA PACCHU - ‘Waydom’ (Lal Lal Lal, cassette)
Maniac’s Dream kinda strikes me as the real mouth frothers of the Avarus camp, with no concern for bongos or bamboo. But now one of the dudes from the band puts out this tape and it sounds like he’s smoking Jesus’ toenails and I don’t know what the fuck to do. High and spaced, this sounds like if I decided to re-record ‘Space Ritual’ in my living room using my coffee table as a drum set. Completely beautiful. Black and white psychedelic? Yeah…I guess there’s such a thing.

WATERSPORTS - s/t (White Tapes, cassette)
S/t (White Tapes, CDR)
Yeah…ya know…in this day and age so much dense black goo, it’s nice someone ain’t afraid to move up front and whisper so confidently. And this Brooklyn love triangle duo (?) is just the cat/kitten to do so. The cassette is a barely there affair that starts off sounding like a recording of your grand mama watching a infomercial in the next room. But then something of a simple beat rises out of the nowhere and turns the silence into a subtle urban dervish. Nice. Just be sure not to ‘rock’ this while the upstairs neighbors blast the latest Eminem. It just won’t be the same…trust me. The CDR is a super bite sized (eight minutes or so) collaboration with Richard Dreyfuss look-a-like Aaron Rosenblum and the fidelity is kicked up a notch, as well as the energy level. A rain soaked Greenpoint street provides an exquisite ambience while Russ, Leay and Aaron kick up a mish mashed faux ethnic hoedown that references everything from Habibyya, Bruce Palmer, Sun City Girls and any other blanks your collector ass wants to fill in here. All I gotta say is more releases, more live outings and more drunken house parties on Grandparents Avenue will make my demeanor go form ‘ashy’ to ‘classy’ in a heartbeat, so let’s give the red and the black our full support…cool?

ESPERS - ‘The Weed Tree’ (Locust Sound)
The glut of late 60’s/early 70’s U.K. folk rock inspired units that have sprouted up in the past few years is enough to drive anyone to their Cockney Rejects single collection. But I have found Philadelphia’s Espers to be one of the few that do it right and pleasing to the ear. Sure, it’s studied, but so are you , ya college graduating bastard, so don’t give me no guff. This somewhat short release (EP? Mini-LP?) is made up of covers from various artists these beardos have found inspiration in and I certainly can’t complain about their choices or the way they are both attacked and loved. The ‘expected’ ones (Nico, Hurley and a couple trad Brit folk tunes) are exquisite as anticipated, but it’s the more oddball selections they’ve chosen that have left me reeling. Their interpretation of the Durutti Column’s ’Tomorrow’ is something I could have never fathomed in all my stoned out fantasies. The way Greg Weeks’ and Meg Bairds’ voices lace together makes the mind drift to pleasant thoughts of sunsets, sunrises and maybe the occasional chocodile. It might as well be a cover of something from one of your fave obscure U.K. folk records, and that am ain’t no bad thing. Equally fucked and exhilarating is their cover of Blue Oyster Cult’s ‘Flaming Telepaths’ which hold on to the tracks’ bizarre mix of melancholy and out-and-out ROCKNESS, but throws a curve in turning into a noisy, uncontrollable rock jam towards the end. Apparently bigger things are ahead for these cats (A Drag City LP, a tour with Stereolab) and I can’t say they don’t deserve it. When you have stood through your one hundred and fiftieth ‘ensemble’ strumming acoustic guitars and braiding their armpit hair, you can’t help but be thankful for groups like Espers. And you better be thankful, buster.

AFTERNOON PENIS - ‘In The Evening’ (Heavy Tapes)
Afternoon Penis is the solo side guise for Nate Nelson, the human metronome/dangler for that constantly swelling duo known as Mouthus. This strictly cassette affair finds Nathaniel lost in his own rhythm like some retarded version of the late, lamented Chris Penn character in ‘Footloose’. It’s the eternal heartbeat for a lost generation. Did you ever wish their could be a fifth and sixth side of ‘Tusk’? Wish no more my fine feathered, fat assed friend...

WARMER MILKS - ‘Penetration Initials’ (Mountain, CDR)
I kept thinking about this dry wood. I didn’t know it was supposed to look like that. A slight shift of air. A quick stab of darkness shot through the green. That was the last time I remembered that moldy smell in the air and those really high knee socks. After that moment, everything just sank in shit and didn’t stop. Even now, I can’t feel anything but this slight chill that rises up my back from time to time. Sometimes I wonder what their motivation was. Well, to be honest, I think I know exactly what they’re motivations were. But then there it was, confusing and enlightening in it’s way. I remember my sisters’ boyfriend saying ‘Holy Shit!’ in a jock stoner voice and walking closer. I looked away from the dried wood and saw this fleshy tabletop. He waved me on further into the woods and I had to follow him. But I looked back a few times before I went further down the trail. Clothes were sort of there, not really though. It looked like they just shoved them off where they could and that was that. I didn’t tell anyone what I saw.

I THINK THAT’S ENOUGH FOR NOW. IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS EXPECT REVIEWS OF TWINKLE, GOWN, BLUES CONTROL, INCA ORE, MOUTHUS AND MANY MORE. NOW GO PLAY WITH YOUR WRIST ROCKET…

Oh yeah, most of this stuff is readily available at www.fusetronsound.com